Upset by SIL's comments

[chimayrah]

Hoping for a bit of perspective on this as feel really upset by it. The last few months I've managed to get into what (to me) was a pretty consistent exercise regime of running 3x a week (I did couch to 5k and now hoping to work my way up to a 10k), and strength training in the gym 2x a week. The other two days I do walking or might do a bit of swimming or cross training at the gym if the weather is awful. Anyway considering I have been overweight my entire adult life and always hated exercise I felt very proud that I have managed to keep this up. SIL asked me about it as I've lost some weight and so I told her what I'd been doing. She said the exercise I was doing was fairly minimal, didn't really count for anything and that the 30 minutes I do of strength training per session was "nowhere near enough". To be clear I push myself really hard during the 30 minutes, I do this amount of time because I have young DC and a busy job and I just do not have the time for longer sessions. She said "oh well I suppose it's better than nothing but it's the bare minimum really".

I feel totally deflated now tbh.

Typical mean girl bitchy behaviour. She can see you achieving something and doesn’t like it. You were the person in the family she saw herself as better than and she doesn’t like that it’s changing.

Ignore her. Keep going. You’re doing loads! Well done!!

Ah ok well dont let her bother you. If someomw makes a bitchy comment to me, its like water off a ducks back...says morw about them than me.

If shes really fit she may not realise how little most people do. My sister used to make comments like "its not worth putting your trainers on for a run of less than 5 miles" 🙄 I honestly dont think she realised how unfit most people are. Try not to take it to heart and keep on doing what youre doing.

You do quite a lot tbf and it’s a little bit every day that will get you where you want to be, she’s being silly.

OP you are doing AMAZINGLY. Well done on the Couch to 5K, massive achievement, and you are pushing forwards!

Great that you are fitting in strength training too.

I hope you are feeling the benefit in feeling fitter, and you are enjoying the boost to your morale that you deserve from your achievements.

Your SIL must be feeling very insecure and nasty minded to feel the need to try and out you down.

Tell her to eff off. It sounds like jealousy to me.

What you are doing sounds brilliant and it's obviously working. I am very overweight and am trying to get my butt into gear. I love hearing about other people doing well.

Well done, that’s such an amazing change!! And to do it so regularly too. It sounds like it’s great for your overall fitness and mental health . Agree she sounds threatened by something or enjoys taking people down to make herself feel superior. It says everything about her and NOTHING apart about you (well, apart from you must be doing a great job if it’s rattled her )

Please don’t let this deter you OP, you’re doing so brilliantly and you only have to answer to yourself

Well done OP, that’s a great achievement to get into a regular exercise regime and another to lose weight too!

Your SIL is a bitch.

You’re doing great OP, well done!

Next time SIL comments make sure you have a Witty comeback ready (I would offer suggestions but I’m crap with them).

Your SIL is talking bollocks. You are doing brilliantly OP. For someone who was previously quite unfit, to get to the end of C25K, and now going further and incorporating other exercise is a huge achievement. WELL DONE YOU.

You exercise seven times a week, whilst working and parenting, you are amazing! That is LOADS of exercise. Your sister in law is being jealous. I think it's fantastic.
Please do not take ANY notice at all of what she thinks. Keep doing exactly as you are and well done!

Agree she doesn't want you to do well for her own reasons. She might seem to have it all together but there's obviously some insecurity there.
However this is absolutely not your problem so carry on doing this for you. It is absolutely not a bare minimum.

When I said I think its fantastic, I meant what you are doing, NOT your sister in law being jealous?!

There are certain people who love to find the downside of what you do, whatever it is. She sounds like one of those. You are doing loads and there is tons of research that shows you dont need to do hours and hours of exercise at a time to benefit from it. Next time she makes a comment, tell her you are also going to exercise your right to ignore her.

She's a nasty piece of work OP.
I've no idea why someone would want to put others down.

You sound bloody amazing... don't let her silly words knock you back.

Trust me. She doesn't want you losing weight. No idea why. But she's not a nice person

Well. She’s a fucking peach, isn’t she.

"nowhere near enough" for what or who?! You're doing it for yourself, ignore her. Whatever reason she has for making shit comments like that is her own problem, and nothing to do with you. FWIW I wish I could get motivated to do what you're doing, I think you're incredible for putting your mind to it and doing something for yourself. Fuck her!

AFAIK she doesn't do any exercise bar dog walking. She is very fit and healthy though. I honestly can't see any reason she'd be jealous of me. She has more money, a bigger (and significantly tidier!) house, a better job. I just thought, when she said that today - do you have to piss on my chips?!!?

Your SIL is nasty. Don't let her put you off your fantastic achievements and routine.

100% agree with this, I've encountered plenty of her kind myself - their superficiality, arrogance and nastiness never ceases to amaze me.

Take a step back and think if you would ever say to someone what she said to you. I bet you wouldn’t because it would be incredibly rude and demoralising (aside from not even being a rational person’s idea of what is true). Now apply those same standards to your SIL. Ask your DP if she’s always been an arsehole or it it’s a more recent thing.

DH can't stand her tbh, but he and his brother are close so he just accepts it.

I have often found her a bit abrupt but that's just how she is.

What a cunt. She's threatened by you, op. Use this as motivation, whatever you're doing is obviously working. You should be so proud of what you've accomplished.

I don’t think you should bother wondering what her motivation is, the main thing is you’ve got into a good routine which is working for you and you should be very proud of yourself.

Don't equate slim with fit and healthy.

It's much better to be slim but there gets a point you have to do the resistance and CV work to maintain bone strength, muscle mass and heart health.

Sarcopenia is to be avoided and you're doing the work now!

I'm as fat as fuck and just about to embark on the CV bit of the above list, to help with blood pressure, heart health and muscle stability.

Give yourself a bit of love!