If your life's already disastrous, are you finding the current situation less alarming?

[WanderingFruitWonderer]

Hard to condense what I mean in a title.
Basically, my life hasn't at all gone to plan! Mostly due to mental health struggles, triggered by trauma. I've struggled with life since I was eleven years old. I'm also just one of life's exceptionally sensitive souls, and easily overwhelmed by everyday things that 'normal' people seem better able to cope with. I've struggled with rubbish accommodation and low income for years. I'm self-employed, and live an alternative life, as can't cope with a lot of mainstream stuff. I'm not successful in the conventional sense. But as a result of all that, I've learnt to find my joy in the simple things - a walk along the beach at sunrise, a cup of tea consumed mindfully, watching butterflies etc. Brief periods of respite (which happens now and then) from the chronic anxiety bring unfettered joy!
So weirdly, I think I'm finding the current state of things (essentially society starting to collapse) less shocking. I've essentially been in training for it for years. I've lived a microcosm of such collapse, for a long time. I say this with caution, as I have huge empathy and sympathy for those who are not coping at all with things currently. I'm very worried about people struggling to stay warm and well fed etc. The climate crisis keeps me awake at night too. But, as my life has been so disappointing and disastrous in many ways for many years, a lot of the economic and societal stuff just feels like more of the same, in terms of the effect on me personally. I never really experienced the boom. I wonder if anyone else is experiencing something similar atm?

@CryingInTents thank you for this, and your post very much fits in with this thread. You take care

Kind of. This ain’t my first rodeo. Those who’ve never experienced adversity are finding things more challenging - but perhaps the first time MY life imploded I was the same.

But then I found the same on the ante natal boards - those whose lives had revolved around themselves and “naice” struggled far more than those of us who just got the fuck on with it.

'In the UK'
Why speak about it like that if you actually live here.

We have access to both ambulances and GP appointments and always have done. This is hyped up media nonsense. Maybe in a few places they were under strain at different points due to staff sickness and backlogs but our system has coped admirably here. (SW) Our passport came back in record time - three weeks in October so those issues are not there any longer. Schools have been stretched for the past thirty years - no change. There is a recruitment issue in all of Europe, we spent the summer in France and the situation is far more acute there especially in F&B industry. There are shortages everywhere, we are lucky to avoid the black outs and energy drive of 15%. You are now resorting to second guessing whether there might be future problems...goodness me, we should stick to the facts.

Quite frankly, you sound out of touch with what is actually happening. Feeding from old news and rehashing it like it is happening now.

I am not certain you even live here, who starts the conversation in the UK if they are actually here. We are doing really well under the circumstances, and that is not being celebrated enough. I appreciate many are seeing problems through the lens of mental health issues which is obscuring the facts perhaps, so may be it is not deliberate.

Nothing bothers me anymore, everything comes and everything goes, the natural ebb and flow of life. It's the people that never expect things in life to change, or not go as planned that struggle most, let go of the way you think life should be and make the best of the life you have here and now.

That’s the thing about the people with the least to lose. They have the least to lose.

@babyyodaxmas it's not exactly self-imposed. More that there are lots of things I don't think I can do. Hard to explain. I have an exceptionally low income, currently topped up by a bit of universal credit, though I really want to stop that if I can.
I think some people's lifestyles may seem like an absolute choice from the outside, but it's often much more complex than that.
But yes, in some ways I have less to fear than others, as I am so well rehearsed in the low income etc lifestyle. I guess that's part of my point.

Op maybe your spartan life and mental health are colouring your view somewhat, but in my life we are having a great life. Celebrating halloween, fireworks this weekend to look forward to. Then counting down and preparing for Christmas.
IF we have black outs we will enjoy it with candles and song.
This is all a frame of reference.
If you see bad in everything, thus it will be so.
If you see some happiness in life, thus it will be so.

The information is the same - but it is how you choose to frame it that makes all the difference. The same crap can and does happen to everyone in various different ways.

Your position - which seems like a brace position waiting for the world to end - is defensive in stance, comforting yourself that things have been worse for you. But what if the world does not collapse and life is the same next spring, summer and beyond, are you always going to brace for the worst?

Life is for the living, recognise it is finite and take what you can in terms of happiness and joy. A cage, even a comfortable one is still a cage.

Yep! I guess that's it...

My husband (long ago diagnosed with depressed and anxiety) found the pandemic easier to deal with than me (no MH issues- prone to feeling a bit anxious/overwhelmed at times). At the very start, I was very anxious and emotional, he was fine. He said his brain had been planning for a catastrophe for twenty years.

I do know what you mean OP but society is not collapsing and it is a bit alarmist to say that! It's all a bit crap at the mo for sure. But not collapsing.

I'm genuinely very happy for you that life is good for you.
Yes, of course there's always joy and wonder to be found.
But life at its base can be extraordinarily challenging for many people for many years, through no fault of their own whatsoever.
I'm not waiting for the end of the world! Nor am I defensive. I possibly am comforting myself. I'll be very happy if life for everyone improves, and absolutely agree that life is for living. I'm not sure I understand your cage comment.
In general, I think you possibly misunderstood my original post. But probably my bad for not articulating myself as I intended to.

Point taken. Bad choice of words on my part. I guess I was trying to inject a little dark humour into the situation, by using hyperbole. But possibly it got lost in translation in the written word. Apologies.

Yep, that's exactly it. Hope you and your husband are both well now

I don’t think she is being dramatic either.

In my city if you want an ambulance for a stroke you can’t guarantee you will get one without a wait of a few hours. If you have broken a hip you are likely to be waiting over 12 hours. GP service is pretty inaccessible here & our city was identified as the place it was likely to fail first - it depends how you define failure I guess. ED frequently announces they cannot provide a service, I’ve been there listening to the announcements.

if you need a regular prescription you cannot guarantee you will get it. This sucks when that prescription is for epilepsy meds.

Whilst I appreciate cars are not life & death for most, access to an appropriate vehicle is essential for my son every day, without that he risks a hospital admission. We have been waiting since august for an oil filter, repairs to bodywork have a 6 month wait (previously had to use a hire car for 4 months - and at one stage had to travel over 100 miles for the hire car). The issues with cars lay bare our reliance on China, much as the fuel crisis has revealed the reliance on Russia.

I wanted to buy food for stir fry the other day. Shelves were almost empty.

So I’d say lots of stuff is pretty broken.

And we are about to head into a future with climate change impacting worldwide. We may not have starvation here but areas of the world becoming inhabitable will of course impact on the U.K. (Hello even more populism).

So yes life goes on. For some people the shortages are a risk to their life (see ambulance) or their quality of life (see problems in social care). If you have enough money and are healthy you may not be aware just how fragmented things are for those who have limited buffers to protect their well-being. No it’s not wholesale collapse of society but for some the services they need are no longer functioning. It’s a collapse of a sort even if it doesn’t affect you.

@MegGriffinshat I'm so sorry
I wish you happy times ahead.

Let's all move to where @Kissingfrogs25 lives. Most of us here in the UK are not experiencing what you are. I suspect it's because your head is firmly in the sand tbh.

Yes, that's true. I already had my 'shock' years ago.

I agree I don't think this thread is for me, at all.

Have you actually been to A and E lately? Because I have and waited for 8 hours and then got transferred to another part and waited until the next day before actually seeing a doctor. You don't know what you're talking about.

Probably not! But I wish you well

I sort of get what you mean. My husband had a brain tumour in 2020 and getting through that during lockdowns etc was awful especially when I couldn’t visit him in hospital, his treatment was successful and I actually got pregnant in 2021 but it was a difficult pregnancy, I had the baby this year and she’s had various medical issues and now I’ve been diagnosed with cancer, am two surgeries down and start chemo in a couple of weeks. I just do not have the emotional capacity for anything else anymore, I feel utterly worn down by our own personal circumstances so I can’t even pay attention to the news let alone worry about it.

That being said, I know that despite this barrage of shit life’s thrown at us we are still in a privileged position - we haven’t been struggling financially and the NHS has been incredible, the maternity, paediatric and cancer services at my hospital have been brilliant and I’ve always been able to get a GP appointment. My GP has saved my life.

👏🏼 👏🏼 I bloody love posters like you. Sensible, rational words in a sea of drama and sensationalism.

@WorryMcGee I'm so sorry to read about all your struggles lately. I hope you recover fully, and have a great future ahead

A lot of people who experience adversity will become more resilient as a result! If you are used to not being in control of your life and going without, the prospect of a hard winter is probably not much of a shock to the system. People always say that lockdowns were easy for the wealthy but IMO many struggled more than they are willing to admit by suddenly not bring able to do as like, go on holidays etc. They were not used to having a barrier to everything.

On the otherhand the current situation will be easer for those with the most resources to start with. The ones with money in the bank, with space to 'stock pile' and with access to private health care will do better imo.

You are completely correct. My life collapsed around my ears at the age of 18. I’ve endured 30 years of complete misery off the back of it. Putin could blow us to smithereens tomorrow and I’d hardly blink my eyes. He worst has happened to me already. You’d struggle to make an impact.