Advice needed please - problems with nursery.

[MOIEMA]

Hi guys, please desperately need advice on the way forward. I kept my baby in nursery at 5months as I needed to return back to work as a single mother having not earned an income in 7.5months. My baby was sleeping through the night at 8 weeks but all this stopped once she started nursery.
But my main concern was that she just wasn't sleeping during the day while at nursery, she would sleep for 20min 2/3times instead of 1.5hrs (2 times) at home. During the weekends she would sleep for hours during the day and all night. She was at nursery 4 days a week.
One morning I dropped her off and a little girl told me that the baby is always crying, but I asked staff how she was and this wasn't mentioned to me.

I decided at week 3 that she needs to be at home and told nursery I would be withdrawing her immediately as babies grow when they sleep and mine isn't getting enough sleep. I was told I would need to pay the 6 weeks notice period whether I bring her there or not. There was no concern made at all towards her well-being. I know I made a mistake taken her there at such a young age now I don't know what to do. Any suggestions please.

My little one doesn’t nap nearly as well at nursery as he does at home. It’s a bit harder to control the environment. I think I’d be speaking to them about how they can help make nap time better. She is still so small - you’re right she does need sleep.

What about a childminder? It might be a quieter environment, I used a CM that had a separate room for naps.

Yes they will have a notice period that you need to pay for if you are taking her out. Its nothing to do with not caring about her well being, you've entered a contract that has a notice period.

How will you work if your baby isn't at nursery?

I really feel for you. It's so hard to put your baby in childcare and in comparison to you I've been fortunate, my eldest didn't start until 9 months and my youngest 10.5 months and that both still felt little and hard. Both of mine hardly napped at nursery and tended to nap more on the other days to make up for it, but it didn't really affect their night time sleep thankfully. My youngest has just turned 1 and yesterday he had one 45 min nap at nursery compared to about 3-4 hrs he would have at home with us! He was very upset by bed time from overtiredness, poor thing.

As for paying for 6 weeks, do you have a contract? It should state what the norice period is. Mine is 8 weeks, it's pretty standard to have to continue to pay for a notice period I'm afraid.

Not sure if your query is childcare or contractual.

for the notice period, you need to check the t&c you signed. One month notice is normal so 6 weeks isn’t too far out. You will need to pay this.

from the childcare perspective, 5/6 months was the norm when I had my children as the increase in mat leave is fairly new. Changes to sleep patterns in nursery are common and playing catch up when they’re not in nursery. Did you try discussing with the nursery to see if they had any suggestions?

a cm might suit better as the environment may be quieter

You need to separate your emotions from the fact that from their point of view you entered into a business arrangement and they now have to fill the place.

There is no way to reliably know she’d always have continued sleeping reliably through the night nursery or no nursery, there could be a lot of changes in that time due to growth spurts/hunger levels/ l teething/separation anxiety (which can develop regardless of your childcare set up)

Napping is tricky though, mine went at 10 months and that was and still is hard as it isn’t what I want, and it took him weeks to be able to switch off enough to do an okay nap there. He will still always nap better at home. His night sleep was great for a time but has recently gone to shit- other factors though, I’m not blaming the nursery.

The notice period sounds entirely reasonable. What’s your new plan?

Sleeping through the night at 8 weeks is unusual no? They need to wake for feeds and nappy changes?

Well the new plan is to stop work till she is much older, therefore no income means I can't afford to pay the fees so now I am stuck.

Please focus, the advice is needed on nursery and contract. Thanks

If you're contract says a six week notice period then you will need to pay the six weeks fees.

Why don't you think you should pay? It is standard for their to be a notice period. I don't understand why you think you shouldn't pay?
Did you tell the nursery that you were pulling her out because baby wasn't sleeping so wouldn't grow?

Have you already left your job?

Im asking because if so, there's no point in me saying anything else about that really but I think you need to weigh up what is going to be most important for your baby in the longer term rather than just what is most difficult for her right now. Some economic security seems like a big price to pay for some naps that she will outgrow as she gets older.

Nobody can answer your question - you haven't checked your contract. In there it will say what the notice period is.

It's a shame your LO didn't settle, but whether they are concerned for her welfare or not, if it's in the contract that you give 6 weeks notice, that's what you agreed to.

Notice period is fairly normal. What does it say in the contract?
It's not really about the wellbeing. Not many 5 month olds, let alone 8 week olds sleep through the night. It won't harm her.

Please focus?!

Pay up!

You would have signed at the beginning and had the chance to query/clarify any T&C’s.

It's simple, you work the six week period so you can pay the fees and keep her in for the 6 weeks. I'm sure she's not crying all the time nobody likes to sit amd listen to a baby cry constantly. How would a small child know anyway, as presumably baby is in the baby room, not the toddler or preschool rooms?

😂🤣

Babies also go through sleep regression. I think your expecting too much from a 5 month old

Assuming it’s in your T&C’s (and it’s a pretty typical notice period) it’s perfectly legal.

For more focus be more concise. We didn’t need the background if it’s just about notice.

If you only wanted advice on the notice period why all the extra detail? You can’t breach a contract because a baby doesn’t sleep well in the setting.

Surely you have a notice period with your job too, it's not like you're going to stop working tomorrow and your income will suddenly stop. Work for another 6 weeks while you're still paying for nursery. Take a few annual leave days here and there if you can so you can be at home with the baby some days, and use the nursery for the other days.

I assume you have a plan for how you're going to manage with no income after that?

You listened to a 4 year old who is probably in a different room and withdrew your baby on that rather than speaking to the nursery? You need to pay the fees as it’s in your contract

If it's in the contract that there's a 6 week notice period, then you have to pay it.
Simple as that, no way around it. You aren't entitled to go against the contract because you don't think she slept enough.