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Original poster

I am just about to email to turn down a job offer for a job I actually really want. Anyone else had this occur?

316 replies

ThatBliddyWoman · 13/10/2022 06:48

I have had two interviews for the job, one just an informal meeting and the second a presentation. Both went well and I was offered the job. It was advertised as (for example) the pay starting at about 2K less than I am on now, and going up to 3 and a half thousand more.

They've offered me the very lowest end of the scale, because I don't have all of the experience they wanted.

They wanted a degree, experience in one particular field and experience in another field. I have two degrees (a Masters) and experience in one but not both of the areas so they'd start me on the lowest pay.

It's also more hours than I do now (albeit not many) some hours WFH some in the office. So I'd have to factor in petrol costs, and paying a dog walker.

I've looked at my finances over and over and I just can't do it :(

I keep re-wording the email. What I want them to do is to come back and say 'Great we'll give you more money then!' but It's not likely is it.

I have a gut feeling that they've not had many people apply. I breezed through both the interviews, I got the impression they really liked me :(

It's also in a field I really want to work in and really want to gain experience in. They'd offered to put me through a qualification I have always wanted too.

Gutted. Has anyone else had something such as this happen?

OP posts:
cosmiccosmos · 13/10/2022 07:35

Negotiate and DONT tell them what you are on now.

Original poster
ThatBliddyWoman · 13/10/2022 07:35

@@lannistunut I know, It's definitely that. I'm a lot better than I used to be beleive it or not but still affected obviously. Must try harder. And good point, being assertive and knowing one's mind isn't a bad thing in the role I am going for.

OP posts:
Bunce1 · 13/10/2022 07:36

This happened to me! I asked for a phone call to follow up and I negotiated a higher salary. They were just chancing their arm trying for the low end. It’s just a game.

play the game and win!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Jobs
FivePotatoesHigh · 13/10/2022 07:36

It doesn’t matter what you’re currently on. Don’t include that. Just say you’re looking for X, is that possible.

Yogipineapple123 · 13/10/2022 07:36

Agree with all the other posters - negotiate! They were probably vague about increasing the salary because it’s an admin faff, not because they can’t afford it.

DO NOT say you need the higher end because of cost of living crisis or not being able to financially make it way. Say you need the higher end due to your current salary, skills and experience.

QuietNeighbour · 13/10/2022 07:38

I have moved internally twice within an organisation that always starts new roles on the lowest spine point of a pay scale. Both times I have successfully negotiated up. I ask for the top of the pay scale and list the points (my experience and additional responsibilities) that justify it. The first time I was raised straight to the top point and the second time taken to one point below the top.

just facts, no fluff. Polite, to the point.

Summersdreaming · 13/10/2022 07:38

I was guilty of this a couple of years ago. It was my dp who said ask for the salary you want + 5k. I was cringing when I did, but I got it! From there it has gone up, I really think if I'd gone in low it sets the tone and I'd still be on similar now. You have nothing to lose!

ReneBumsWombats · 13/10/2022 07:40

FivePotatoesHigh · 13/10/2022 07:36

It doesn’t matter what you’re currently on. Don’t include that. Just say you’re looking for X, is that possible.

Don't ask if it's possible. Just state that the offer is less than you earn now and that you love and want to take the job but you're very sorry, you can't take it for less than X.

They can make the decision if they think you're worth it, but don't make it sound like you're asking a favour.

BiscuitTinClarabel · 13/10/2022 07:40

ThatBliddyWoman · 13/10/2022 07:03

I find being so assertive really difficult! I will probably write something that says that, but in a bit of a 'fluffier' way if that makes sense!

Show quote history

No no no no, not in a fluffier way! You need to make sure that you don't apologise for asking for more money and just simply make it a negotiation about a 'fair offer', which they will be expecting. They want you to work for them - you know this - so this is what it will take to make that happen. Be polite, friendly but firm and above all CLEAR. I suggest write your email then literally go through it and take out everything you think a man wouldn't say (or that you would be embarrassed to admit to on this thread 😉😊). Good luck!

Original poster
ThatBliddyWoman · 13/10/2022 07:41

I've emailed them.

No fluff!

I'll see what comes back!

Currently a night worker so I must go to bed shortly! But thank you so much for all the input, I truly appreciate it.

It's an interesting discussion definitely. And inspiring to see that so many of you have succeeded with this type of thing. I learn a lot from mumsnet!

OP posts:
Vapeyvapevape · 13/10/2022 07:44

Sell yourself , explain that the offer is too low because your skills are amazing and you will be fabulous in the role , maybe tone it down a bit but definitely ask for more and tell them why you're worth it.

crunchieroxks · 13/10/2022 07:45

Well done @ThatBliddyWoman - will keep my fingers crossed for you.
I too was a "fluffer" but am less so now and it feels empowering (without wanting to sound cheesy!) even when you don't get a result! It also gets easier every time you do it - so keep practising 😂

As an aside

This, here is why I bloody love Mumsnet. Women supporting each other and cheering each other on to greater and better things, or just things that will make us happier, more content etc.
Bloody brilliant 👏 Flowers

dizzyupthegirl86 · 13/10/2022 07:46

I did!
I hated my previous job, and was so keen to move on. I went for two interviews at one place, and had a great feeling about it. I then had a call offering me the job, but they were only ‘able’ to match my current salary, and the annual leave was 2 days less than I got at the time (I think the pension contributions were slightly lower too now I think of it). It was a longer, worse commute too. I really wanted to leave my job, and liked the sound of the new one, and I wouldn’t have lost out financially other than slightly higher fuel costs… but my head was screaming at me that I shouldn’t be taking what seemed to be a step down.

if you find your current job easy, that suggests you are really good at it. If they’ve offered you the job, that suggests they think you’ll be good at their job. YOU probably don’t appreciate how good a prospect you are!

As an aside, I turned the job down
(and made it clear what the reasons were), and was sore about it for a few weeks. A couple of months later I got a call from another division of the same company. The first office had happened to mention how good my interview was to them in passing (and why I’d turned it down), and someone at division 2 knew of me from my current job at the time. I went for an interview, they offered me a bit more money and ‘unofficially’ matched my holiday - I’ve been there for a little over three years now and it’s hands down one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Good luck OP - changing jobs is frankly a pain in the arse so you should be compensated for it. You obviously impressed them, but don’t forget that they need to impress you too. Here’s their chance!

TippyToesKnows · 13/10/2022 07:47

Absolutely agree to negotiate, but make clear how much you want the job as dedication and enthusiasm go a long way in many companies.

Sell the specific reasons why you believe you are the right choice and worth the additional £.

And instead of "can't afford to work for less" say it's not "financially viable". Less needy, but means the same and less aggressive than just stating an amount with no reason and refusing to budge.

CornishGem1975 · 13/10/2022 07:47

It's worth a try. I negotiated on my pay when they offered me the job, got more holiday, an extra payment to cover the fact I was switching from work from home to a hybrid role and guaranteed flexible working/hours to suit myself. Best thing I ever did. My new employers are great, really supportive, the work is super busy and challenging but I love it and I could go in it feeling happy and confident because they listened to me from the start. You'll get a good idea if they really are the type of company you want to work for based on their response.

ReneBumsWombats · 13/10/2022 07:48

Good for you. Good luck!

Vapeyvapevape · 13/10/2022 07:49

Fingers crossed for you, let us know how it goes .

HouseBook · 13/10/2022 07:50

Good luck OP, they would be fools to let the right candidate go over a couple of thousand.

SausageMonkey2 · 13/10/2022 07:51

Hope you asked for more than you’re on now!

Taleotallyhoho · 13/10/2022 07:51

I started my own thread on applying for a job that required me to write 10,000 words (no not characters! Words!) in my application yesterday.

The job was only £19000ish, a HUGE pay cut and I decided it was too many red flags and I stopped half way and baked a cake instead.

Then read online for reviews about working there and it was awful! The low pay was the red flag, the ridiculous application process was another.

Good luck OP, you're worth more!

EatingWormsMichael · 13/10/2022 07:54

This happened to me. The pay scale was within my current salary but they offered at the bottom end. I said I couldn't make it work and that I'd bring lots of useful experience to the role etc. However they wouldn't go higher as it would offend an existing member of staff to see me come in at a higher wage. Such a shame.

TheOrigRights · 13/10/2022 07:55

Good luck OP. I'd browsed this thread, 'watched' it so I could add a comment later, and see you've already emailed them.

TeaCosyApplePie · 13/10/2022 07:56

I was in this situation recently, and I ended up turning it down. They didn't budge which was upsetting, but on reflection if they aren't willing to pay for the skills I have then it's their loss. It's an employee's market out there. Another role will come along.

Fortuny · 13/10/2022 07:57

With regards to the lack of experience, can you briefly reiterate the transferable skills you've mentioned upthread?

littleburn · 13/10/2022 07:58

Think like a man and negotiate! Seriously, I do a lot of work around pay and the gender pay gap and men absolutely will dig their heels in and push for more. As women we're socialised to be nice and not do this and it doesn't serve us well. Your reasons for feeling uncomfortable negotiating (being perceived as 'difficult') are a perfect example of this.

If not that many people have applied and they clearly do want you, then you have ample room to negotiate your salary up. If you're going to say no on the basis of the salary anyway, you've absolutely nothing to lose by asking for more. Just be honest, tell them your current salary is x and that they will need to offer a salary of at least y for it to be worth your while to change job. Good luck!