I think I may have made a mistake that there's no way on earth I can admit to

[Explaintome]

Except maybe here.

DS has his first serious girlfriend. She's lovely, they seem very happy, she stays here about twice a week.

As a result his room is immaculate for the first time in nearly a decade, but has also seen the introduction of air fresheners.

I hate air fresheners with a vengeance. I dislike the cloying smell and I am convinced they give me a headache and sore eyes. I have told DS they need to go, if your room smells, clean it and open a window. He swears they have all been removed, but I can still smell them in his room and the "den" they use, especially when she's here.

I think I've just realised it's not airfreshener, but her perfume.....

Check the plugs. Mine had one of those threevolution fuckers pumping out.
I couldn't see with migraine and he insisted it was just floor wipes.

As mistakes go it’s very minor.

I don’t like air fresheners either, they always seem to cloy at the back of my throat and give me a headache. Scented candles seem ok though.

Surely it would be obvious if it was her perfume though OP. She’d have to reek of the stuff if it’s lingering once she’s gone?
Maybe ask him to keep a window open as much as possible to see if that helps

I have an adverse reaction to some perfumes - they bring on a migraine. I would have to say something in your shoes - along the lines of it's a lovely fragrance (white lie) but unfortunately I'm allergic to it.

Lol easy done! Just don’t mention it again, you can’t ask her to change her perfume.

You are totally ok to ask people not to wear perfume in your house for health reasons. I mostly work from home since covid and going into the office always means someone is wears overpowering scent. The young men seem the worst, spraying their lynx at their desks. Home is my sanctuary my rules.

I have a friend that wore a perfume that made me feel 🤮.

Lots of open windows when she came to my house. Thankfully she no longer wears it.

I don't think I can say "you know I've been complaining about that awful airfreshener? I think it's your perfume" 😆

Don't put it like that - treat it as if it were a separate issue.

Talk about strong smells, not awful smells. Ever since having my 1st DC more than 20 years ago I cannot tolerate strong smells - have an issue with air fresheners, diffusers, perfume, spray deodorant. Both DC know if anything is being sprayed it has to be in a room with the door shut and preferably an open window but I actively try and discourage anything being sprayed.

Eek that’s tricky. I have a new colleague and I really can’t stand the smell of her perfume…I can’t describe it but it’s a very unpleasant smell to me and I feel sick every time after speaking to her. I can’t say anything though!

I used to feel ill when I came into contact with people wearing Poison or Loulou back in the day so I feel for you.

However I definitely wouldn't say anything to his girlfriend. Maybe buy her a different one for Christmas?

God, I remember first pregnancy, like I picked up super doggy smelling powers. My MiL's perfume made me gag! And the memory still lingers , hate it.

@Flapjack637 my aunty uses a bottle of perfume a week! Im not joking when I say I can smell her before I see her. her perfume lasts for ages in our house after shes gone, and I've smelt her in the supermarket before I've seen her!

I asked my mum why she's so crazy with the perfume and she told me when she was 18 her boyfriend used to tell her she smelt and was really abusive and that's why she does this now. She actually saw him in a cafe a few years ago and she gasped and grabbed her perfume out of her bag and squirted herself. Then she cried and said why did I just do that 😞 she's the cleanest person I've ever met aswell with personal hygiene.

but I do understand the headache feeling! Try sharing a car with her! 😂

I’m sensitive too.
We had a tradesman working in our house for a few weeks. He must have used a very strong fabric conditioner. The smell could overwhelm me. Nasty!
I can’t tolerate aftershave and most perfume. Strangely I am ok with Chanel No5 which I have used all my life.

It's not Youth Dew is it? That stuff is the pits and makes me think of Parisienne Brothels.

Your title is hyperbole at its best. Just open a few windows and forget about it.

They all give me a headache & make my neck hurt (some gland I presume)
air fresheners (of any kind, plug-ins are the worst!) anything in that category room diffusers etc.

Scented candles, even unlit.

a LOT of cleaning & laundry products

they give me a headache before I can smell them.

flying can be a nightmare.

so far, unless it's really heavy & cloying I'm mostly ok with perfume/aftershave/soaps/hair care etc.

but pads/panty liners really bother me & it's not something you can ask people to remove

Perfume smells different on different people & it smells different TO other people.

I think you should say something & soon. If you leave it too long she'll wonder why it's just started bothering you.

say something like 'x I have a problem with some fragrances. I'm not sure which ingredient it is as I'm ok with some but not others, but it must be in yours as it's giving me a headache (no need to say it smells horrible to you!!). Would you mind terribly trying a different one for work?

I have one perfume I wear 99.9% of the time, but I'd have no problem trying a different one or going without if it was bothering a colleague.

just ask nicely, it'll be fine.

Of course you can

😆

For one yes, it wasn't intended to be serious. Two, that would assume she's never coming back!

Oh dear I quoted the wrong post!

Are you sure they’re not vaping?

Thierry Mugler's Alien perfume can bring on a migraine for me within 10 mins. OP, you have my sympathy.

Could you mention that she has a very distinctive perfume, with a lot of emphasis on the word distinctive?