The old days of Mumsnet when…

[Anon778833]

Back in 2003, there was a section entitled ‘introductions’ and people would post identifying photos of themselves and their dc. And a post about themselves.

How times change!

I think they used start threads in Chat and have them moved over to the Woolly
Hugs topic later. I'm not sure why 😂

Have finally caved and re-regged just to be able to say that the poster who used to offer advice in relationships, was WhenWillIFeelNormal.

She was a lovely lady. I don't think she was banned - I remember it being that another poster took exception to WWIFN's advice and criticised her really harshly. She left MN as a result.

I have lurked, regged, de-regged, re-regged and so on for the last 15-odd years. I was an active poster from 2010 until the start of the pandemic.

It did used to be funnier. A lot of the nuance seems to have gone now - people take threads very literally and there is a ridiculous amount of "whataboutery" and there's sometimes some very uptight po-facedness. You didn't used to see "lighthearted" in thread titles because it wasn't necessary.

It was very cliquey in the old days, sometimes it was nice, sometimes it wasn't I joined post-Mouldies but people were still talking and upset about it ages after the fact. Difficult to imagine that the site was so small in those days, but people really did know each other. I agree with the comment about having to be recognised in order to get a response. It wasn't the case for all posters and all threads, but the dynamic, particularly in Chat (still should be _Chat as far as I'm concerned!) often felt quite like the juniors looking up to the senior girls in high school.

I miss seeing the quiche threads. I wasn't involved in many but the titles could be funny. I remember something about Wolefs which ran for bloody ages. And also there were a million threads by MNers who were obsessed with Twilight and used to call themselves the Twisluts and write filthy fanfic about vampires.

I also miss the impact it could have. Papers would always pick up interesting threads, but it was also a real force for good. When Riven needed help with her DD because she was at breaking point, and it ended up in the national news. The creation of the FWR boards and all the lobbying that Dittany (and others) did to get MN to add them on - regardless of what your views are - they have been a great resource for lots of women.

On balance I think it's better now for being bigger. There's a much better spread of views. But it can be very intolerant and harsh, which is a shame. It seems incredible now but there was a poster on here when I first joined (whose name escapes me) who was an open supporter of the BNP. MN had restricted her account so she wasn't allowed to NC, and there were very robust threads challenging her on her political views, but if she posted on other topics then people would engage with her quite happily, working on the basis that you can disagree in some areas but still get along in others.

Even de-regged I have still lurked on here. The tipping point for me wasn't the changes over the years, it was the data breaches and lack of confidence that your data was safe.

Ah thank you Soupdragon - chat is seen by all. Various boards not.

The problem with WWIFN was the projection and applying her own situation and emotions to every single other poster. Cog (CogitoErgoSum) was much more level-headed and didn't take offence if the advice was rejected.

I've been here since 2003. It was funnier, absolutely. It was more intelligent wit. Wry, sarcastic, just great timing with one-liners. These days the humour is either invented stories (and I include fat balls and PB in there) aiming for classics, or it's "I just farted, aren't I hilarious" stuff. It's certainly never going to happen again that General Elections are called Mumsnet Elections and the 3 party leaders come on to do a webchat the week of the election itself. To talk about what? The "old bag" next door? How often they fart?

It's not more or less friendly. There's more "what you looking at you cunt" kind of nastiness and less cliquey in-jokes and piling in.

The Christmas appeal was great unless it wasn't. I had a poster complain I'd not sent anything for her child, but only for her. Another who moaned that the Thornton's hamper I sent had a smashed Santa in it and could I replace it. I never bothered after that. But I did raise an eyebrow when someone I know in real life, who was a very very well-known MNer, a housewife with children at private school, started the "I'm down to my last ha'penny" guff just before Christmas.

Now't new under the sun really.

Daftpunk?

Bless you for remembering this @MayThe4th. I would never have got through the dark, terrible days without the incredible kindness of friends - and strangers - on Mumsnet. Am on the site v v rarely now and am amazed to have stumbled on this thread.

Incidentally, a Mile for Maude is still running- as a Mile in Memory, and has been picked up worldwide for other causes, all thanks to Mumsnet and the very wonderful Mumsnetter who set it all up in the first place.

CAT ME YOU CUNT.

It was PuzzleRocks (IIRC) who used to bump/reply to unanswered threads. I actually started a thread a while ago about that and wanting to bring it back. I got one reply I do try and do it myself especially quiet topics (but I NC for a lot of it).

Did I dream this, or did AIBU not actually exist as a topic until so many threads were started "AIBU to..." that MNHQ hived it all off and it turned into fucking Fight Club

I joined 4 years ago when DS was born and so don't know what it was like first hand, but I think that forums in general used to be different. I used to be part of a few active forums 15-20 years ago and they were small, intimate, everyone knew each other. When new people joined they would introduce themselves and slowly start befriending people. There was lots of in-jokes and personal relationship. I got some real life friends and even a long term boyfriend out those forums!

Now the internet is sprawling, people are (rightly) scared to divulge personal info, and there are a lot of fake / troll posts. That's the most annoying thing about MN, most of the good stories you can tell by post 2 are fake, and the ones that go badly get pulled. All hobbies are 'outing'.

But for all that, I think it is the best (only???) forum left that I know of. It is the only forum that has actually helped me in my real life. When DC were born and I felt completely alone, it was a life-saver having access to kind and intelligent women who would take time out of their day to answer my questions. Also what else would I do while pretending to work.....

It did used to be funnier.

I am not so sure about that. There were a lot of 'in-jokes' and 'phrases' that posters used to race to be the first one to say on thread and then everyone would fall about laughing. There were some genuinely amusing responses and threads and I think there still are although they tend to get a bit lost as there are so many threads now.

It was very cliquey in the old days, sometimes it was nice, sometimes it wasn't I joined post-Mouldies but people were still talking and upset about it ages after the fact.

Aah Mouldies, if ever there was an instance of showing just how superior some posters believed themselves to be this was it, so far up their own arses they even invited one of the MN founders to join their breakaway group which was of course going to be bigger and better than MN, MN just wouldn't be able to continue without them. Similar thing happened with the group that went to Reddit and set up their MN monitoring site there, MN was just not going to last without them or indeed cope. Hmm, are they missed?

Goodness seeing your name @ggglimpopo made my heart bump a bit. I can still remember exactly where I was when I read your thread (and when I read about Expat's DD too) and often think of you both (and lots of others).

My first post looks horrifyingly insensitive directly under yours, i cross posted. Sorry.

@WGSW yes!! Thank you!! Whenwillifeelnormal is who I was thinking of. She was ace. Such a shame such a brilliant poster was hounded off the site.

Did I dream this, or did AIBU not actually exist as a topic until so many threads were started "AIBU to..." that MNHQ hived it all off

I said this earlier but clearly everyone ignored me (🤣). Yes, AIBU was set up specifically for the threads that people started in Chat etc with a title that started "Am I Being Unreasonable to..." . In those days, they were genuinely AIBU questions though and MNHQ used to move threads out if they weren't. I'm not sure when they gave up on that.

Don't be sorry! I was going to do a 😘 but thought it might be misconstrued as air kissy so won't ...

WRT it being "funnier" in the old days, I think there were fewer misunderstandings when threads were lighthearted which helped - people seem unable to spot them sometimes now. I don't know why this would have changed though.

Moldies was odd. Nothing wrong at all with setting up a separate chat site elsewhere but I think they went about "recruiting" the wrong way. I never quite understood that bit.

Me too, I often remember @ggglimpopo ’s dd like it was yesterday as well.

A bit over the top to say she was hounded off the site

She was a lovely lady. I don't think she was banned - I remember it being that another poster took exception to WWIFN's advice and criticised her really harshly. She left MN as a result.

The problem with WWIFN was the projection and applying her own situation and emotions to every single other poster. Cog (CogitoErgoSum) was much more level-headed and didn't take offence if the advice was rejected.

I still have my Mile for Maude reusable tote bag 🙂

I agree with this! People have private chats on many platforms all the time. The problem with Moldies was that they didn’t do that - they used to have democratic votes to invite people there. They made a big thing of it to make others feel left out. If I recall, the invited posters had to have a certain level of intellect to be accepted and it all seemed rather elitist.

This has bought back a lot of memories. Im thinking back to the parenting advice I was given that turned out to be very wise.

The rivalry between us and netmums. We were obviously superior The New Years Eve when it all went A Bit Wrong.

Ive still got the badge I made for one of the meet ups.

I've seen this happen on a few forums. The cool kids don't like complying with the rules so set up their own place where they can stay bitter and twisted.... but best of all, forgotten.

I do enjoy a good flounce though 😎

I think I had a Mile for Maude mug? I lost a load of stuff in a house move. I think I remember some MN mugs though. I remember a In Cod We Trust mug? Which I didn't get myself, as it seemed really arse licky, never mind air kissy 

sorry @Cod

WRT it being "funnier" in the old days, I think there were fewer misunderstandings when threads were lighthearted which helped - people seem unable to spot them sometimes now. I don't know why this would have changed though.

Yes I agree, I think that's a better way of explaining it.

You can tell I'm an oldie as I can't get my head round the quote function!!

IIRC the Mouldies thing caused a huge stink because of the way they went about it. Discussing who to invite to the secret new site, is X cool enough to join our gang and so on. It caused a lot of bad feeling because people who didn't make the 'A' list were really hurt and upset when they found out.

One thing I do miss is that the use of the creepy wee brackets (trademark of ScottishMummy) seems to have dramatically reduced.

<<nods head wisely>>