Can't afford the Tooth Fairy

[OfAllTheDaysToday]

I am not looking for handouts, just want someone to tell me what a w*nk parent I am. I get paid in 12 days' time. Have had an unexpected £400 drop in income this month, and dd (5)'s tooth fell out today. I don't have £2 to put under her pillow. Heck, I don't even have 50p to put under her pillow! She is so excited, and it's her second tooth so she knows the "going rate". I have a £10 Aldi gift card to cover the next 12 days, and have not been able to pay my non-priority bills, so next month will be super expensive trying to play catch up. I'm claiming everything I'm entitled to, but don't receive maintenance for the dc's. I feel like I've royally messed up, and my new higher direct debit for energy starts on payday too. I don't feel like I'll ever catch up again. Just feel utterly rubbish.

Our tooth fair is very unreliable, excuses used so far (multiple dc):
The cat scared her off
The weather is too bad to fly
You lost your first tooth abroad and it's too far to fly so you will have to wait until another tooth fairy is allocated
Covid
Put too far under the pillow and she couldn't reach it
.... I know, I know - she's shit

My parents were far from poor but used to get a sixpenny bit (a tanner) wrapped in tin foil with a squirt of my mother's perfume on it. It was magical.

I used to do this all the time as a single parent as I couldn't always get out to the bank machine when a tooth fell out !

Would a foreign coin work and you could make it a thing and do a different country each time (if you have one in a drawer)

I'm ashamed to say I actually forgot the tooth fairy once. Told dd that maybe it needed an extra brush and she came the next night.

Also given a 20p in the dark. I'm going to hell 😟

Leave her a letter. She is visiting the Queen as is a member of the toothfairy Royal family and is not working until after the funeral she will return on this date..... as she will have lots of children to catch up with. Good luck x

Can you make some basic biscuits or cake and put one near her bed with a note (obviously you'd have to eat the rest secretly )

You've been spying on me!!! 🫣

I grew up in a house with no money, but my childhood was magical. Something my dad did was when we'd come in in the morning he'd say the fairies had been (the fairies often left a few penny sweets hidden around the house and sometimes lost their clothes - which were bits of tin foil twisted into the shape of a dress or whatever).
Don't feel like a shit mum. It's nothing to do with finances, it's about being there.
For the tooth fairy money I'd echo others, reuse a £2 or give the 10p, leave glitter or a note - 5 year olds will love whatever you do.

@CaramelTwirl

Won't your parents help you out?

How insensitive and ignorant to assume the OP has parents..

I never thought I'd say this, but I hope the DM picks up this thread. Hopefully it will be a reality check for many.

OP, I can empathise - we were skint when our kids were little. When it came to the tooth fairy etc a little story explaining the reason she was leaving something was perfectly acceptable. eg. "dropped my purse on the way from Fairyland", or "not your first tooth and you have many more to lose - so more for the first tooth and less for the rest" or "smaller amount for a smaller tooth" or even (if you dare, and it applies ) "there's a bit of decay on this one so unfortunately I have to leave less but hopefully some better brushing will result in £2 being left next time". Sometimes we forgot and we just said the next day "oh perhaps it was a very busy night, maybe a lot of children lost teeth yesterday".

To be honest I think they carried on with the charade long past the stage they realised it was a load of bull, as it was worth something to them to go along with it.

A note saying she loved the tooth and will be back on X date with £1
my ex got a note a few times and sometimes they got a few sweets or a couple of biscuits that they could eat before breakfast

oh don't be so dramatic. It's not ignorant and insensitive at all. Most people with young children have at least one parent or an inlaw grandparent. It would be quite unusual for no grandparents to be around whatsoever.

I'd definitely Borrow her other money to use.
I used to do that when I couldn't be arsed to go back downstairs to my bag on tooth fairy nights.

Don't beat yourself up.

The tooth fairy doesn't have to leave much for anything after the first tooth.

Haven't we all been there? "oh, the tooth fairy left a message to say she wasn't feeling well/had a busy night so couldn't get round to our house but would come the next night"

Some of us may also have left the tooth out where the child could find it, and destroyed all of their childhood dreams in one dramatic swoop.

Anything special will be a lovely surprise to her ... a shell, a chocolate coin, a letter, a shiny gem stone/sticker or a coin. I'd have no problem borrowing from her money box if you're sure you can magic the other coin back there before she'd notice - the magic is more important than the value of her money box

Oh god @CurlyhairedAssassin the remembered shame is bringing me out in a sweat! Thank good I never failed as Father Christmas as well! 🥵

Our tooth fairy has been off with covid before (as has the elf on the shelf when we lost him in the loft) Write a lovely note from the Easter Bunny, who writes sick notes for the tooth fairy and shelf elf and you’ll be ok. I’m sorry that it’s so shit financially.

It’s really not dramatic, some people genuinely don’t have parents around any more or even are estranged from them. Why so hard to believe? IME it’s always better not to assume! Plus the OP clearly said they can’t borrow from anyone.

I've just tried that - 2lbs of mixed cat hair and biscuit crumbs, a threatening letter from the milkman and clothes peg . . .

Borrowing it back or the 10p are all fine. It's not about the money. It's about finding something under her pillow.

But make sure you've checked all your winter coats. I found a few trolley pounds going through mine

been there, done that. "The tooth fairy had to leave in a hurry as a poor little boy fell over and smashed all his front teeth all at once and unfortunately in her hurry to get there she dropped the teeth she'd already collected." etc etc

I miss being creative....

I've found my people!!!

I never said it was hard to believe. I'm talking odds.