Messiest gift your child has ever been given pls

[ReluctantCourier]

For an 8yo who helpfully loves arts and crafts.

Received a snide comment about my home at a family bbq and wish to discreetly send the giver my fondest regards whilst winning their child’s affections!

You should be an advertising copywriter with slogans like that.

These suggestions are wonderful 😂 Definitely agree with pottery wheel. Only a mad person would use one in the house, but they have such scope to make a filthy mess even if you only use it in the garden...

And the craft sets. Those bloody boxes advertise "eleventy billion bits you'll never be rid of" on the front as if it's something to be PROUD of 😡

I think I'd go for something lovely like a lush bath bomb. They do a couple with subtle glitter but you're still scrubbing it out of the crevices on bath and child for days. Plus, plausible deniability.

My child was also given a small kit that involved glitter a couple of weeks ago. I've just found some on the newborn who I don't think was even home from hospital at the point the glitter was used.

Definitely a slime kit - I have one from Amazon that comes with little balls and glitter that you mix into the slime - double whammy there!

Another vote for Moonsand. You can't vacuum it as it knackers the hoover and it gets everywhere. DD1 was obsessed with it!

However, if the recipient's parent is anything like me they will just make the child play with it outside on a sunny day. Might not have the desired effect that you're after!

I would put together a little craft set which includes glitter/glitter glue/Pom poms/stickers/Googly eyes - basically anything little and likely to mess up the table or fall on the floor 😂 I have almost daily experience with this (my dd LOVES glitter and sticking googly eyes on everything 🫣)

OR

One of those scientific educational sets where you make a volcano , baking powder and vinegar exploding etc. Fun and messy.

My sister got DD one when I had just come out of hospital with DS.

Lol I cried.

Controversial - Barbies and the shitty accessories they come with. No matter how much you tidy there’s always a rogue shoe or a hairbrush and it’s always me that stands on the fuckers.

Failing that Lego. You don’t want sand/slime etc it’s too obvious!

NO! That iron on bead shit!

It goes EVERYWHERE

Aqabeads. Impossible to clean up.

Candle making kit.

Has the added bonus of ruining saucepans and possibly the hob..

Extra points if the kitchen has polystyrene ceiling tiles :-( (I know these aren't a thing nowadays, but I am old).

Slime, 100% slime.

it stained my carpet and my new patio.

thanks MIL :-(

I’m gonna gift it in winter so it’s defo used indoors 😁

Slime sounds lethal and I’m loving that the sand looks so innocuous…

Homemade slime also has the added benefit of taking the finish off antique tables when left on them… <stares at daughter>

One of those plaster of Paris archaeology things. You get a block of 'stone' and you have to chip away at it until you discover the dinosaur skeleton inside. Bits end up everywhere.

Jelli baff is horrendous to clean up, I'd get that!

An age inappropriate (too young for them) magazine with crappy free toy/make and do gift attached. That's what my DM gave to my kids (9 & 10) one Christmas when she'd bought my neice a laptop and nephew a skateboard and ramps... it worked, they despise her.

Glitter tattoos, it was a brilliant set, with stencils, body glue and loose glitter. We all loved it, the tattoos really did look great but it left a trail of glitter everywhere you went.

Can you still get those plaster of Paris mould kits? We had one that made little houses. You have to mix the plaster to the right consistency, pour it into the little moulds, leave it hanging around for ages to set, then get the paints out…. So many things that could get spilt all over the floor 😄

No idea! My son loved kinetic sand and it wasn't particularly messy 🤷🏻‍♀️

National Geographic fossil dig kit. Not only do you bang away with a hammer, the resulting dust is staggering. My DS adored his. I was less enthusiastic....

A selection of nice make your own kits. Bouncy balls, those plaster of Paris things when you add water and shake the powder in then mould and paint afterwards. Erm, tie dye kits? Kinetic sand, play doh, alllllllll the glitter. Loose glitter, not glitter glue. Ooh hobbycraft have sets that are like squidgy damp foam that you press into a picture (think like the stain glass window things). Go have a browse 😏

Oh me and my brother play this game "most annoying Christmas presents for the children"

Brother knows I hate mess, so has gifted DS moon sand, pottery painting kits, pottery wheel, candle making, play doh, modelling clay, poster paint paper and brushes. He knows DS will nag me to do them and I'll oblige.

I know Brother is noise sensitive and hates noise, so I have gifted the children, drums, a recorder, a kasoo, annoying toy keyboards, a xylophone, kareoke machine, echo microphones, party whistles.

Long may this tradition live on 🤣🤣 every Christmas morning a WhatsApp exchange between me and him go

"You twat, a pottery wheel really?"

And then he will send

"A pissing recorder! You cunt!!"

🤣🤣🤣

Didn't you use the "antidote" stuff afterwards? Ours has always had two sachets with it. One turned the water into that gross gel stuff, and the other turned it back to liquid and it drained away.
Mum first bought it for my eldest two girls circa 1997 and they had great fun with it! Have since bought it for my youngest daughter and most lately my son (he's 9) they've all loved it!
Yes it feels gross, and takes a couple of hours to clean the bath, but not the end of the world x

The scratch art things which are black and they scratch them to make pictures etc... they can get them out and play with them on their own because they're not considered too messy, but they make a lovely mess!