Driving 8 hours to a wedding with a 10 week old baby and a 2 year old

[LondonDave]

Hi

It's my sisters wedding 500 miles away with a 8 hour drive.

My fiancee doesn't want us all to go as she think it's too far away and a long drive plus we would be away 4 days

We will be taking a 10 week old baby and a 2 year old with us.

I've said I want us all to go am I been unreasonable?

Yes, yabu.

That sounds hellish

I did that with a 5 week old baby and it was awful. I agree it’s too far away.

It's a tough one, I understand you'd hate to miss your sisters wedding, is there no way you could do it in 4 hours stints and find a reasonably priced hotel Halfway?

YANBU to want to go but it is a very long journey. Can you fly instead?

If you do have to drive then I would definitely be breaking up the journey with an overnight stay.

Split the journey over a couple of days and you’ll be fine or take a train/fly.

YABU, go on your own

YABU.

Babies can only spend a minute amount of time in a car seat at that age. You'd need 3-4 stops of about 30 mins each on top of the travel.

It's really not a journey for a small baby, unless absolutely necessary, which a wedding isn't.

The lullaby trust recommend babies spend no more than 2 hours in a car seat at a time, with a decent break in between. I think I’ve seen other sources that say at least 30 minutes. That’s an extra 2 hours at least on the journey.

www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/car-seats-and-sids/

Your fiancé is right

Well the mother of the 10 week old - who gave birth or is going to give birth to the ten week old - thinks it's too much. So it's too much.
Unless you want to grow and squeeze out the baby, feed it from your body, bleed and suffer the pain of childbirth and then sit in the car for that length of time listening to both of your small children cry and moan when you're still very much trying to recover? In which case, crack on.

Hell no. Go on your own.

If you were my Husband, I'd be sending you on your own, and making it a 3 day trip (down one day, wedding one day, leave after lunch on day 3).

I read the thread title before clicking and immediately thought "OH DEAR GOD NO". So yes, YABU. Go by yourself, or go with the 2yo.

Dear London Dave's fianceé doing a reverse,

Stand your ground. This is not a journey that needs to be undertaken. London Dave can fly, drive, coach or train up on his own.

But how long have you known about this situation? When's the wedding?

I agree with previous posters. I do not think travelling that far with a baby would be safe- unless it’s split into two days- which I appreciate is a lot of time and expense.
Despite that given it’s your sister’s wedding, I think it would only be right for you ( alone or with your wife and kids) go
Family duty
How far away is wedding date? can you save, plan to make it a mini break with detours along way

Go on your own and have a great time.

Go on your own. I feel stressed just trying to imagine that trip.

What difficult timing but I can see why you'd like your family with you at a big event like this. Actually the 10 week old is more portable than a 2 year old. If everyone is well and able it is doable over a few days but the issue is if your partner wants to do it and what you can do to cut down the hassle as it will be
exhausting but would be anyway without any children. I don't think either of you are wrong re your views. But I would say unless there is a back story I would be wanting to attend as a family and would expect to do so as the in law. Is the wedding in your home area and you moved away or did sister move away ?

Book your fiancée some overnight help and go on your own.

This

You should go with the toddler (assuming no breastfeeding). Allow time for lots of stops on the journey but totally doable.

Leave mum and baby at home.

No I think that’s utter madness!

A five week old cannot be in a car seat anywhere near that length of time. Even if you took breaks it would still be way too long in a car seat. You’re being ridiculous.

I didn't have to read any further than the title. Nope.
Absolutely no way