How do I stop self destruction? Eating and diet related.

[Fanciedanamechange44]

I need to lose weight, everyday I have good intentions, then I boredom eat. I've just had toast with jam.
I used to binge eat but I'm managing that much better now, I just cannot stick to any sort of healthy eating. I feel as though I need to be 100% good about my eating, and if I fall off the wagon I lose all motivation to get back on it. The more weight I put on the more fed up I get and food is my comfort!
Any words of wisdom?

My husband has lost a lot of weight over the past ten months and has so much self control which makes me feel even more annoyed with myself.

I think you've got your key right there. If you fall off the wagon (you will) you don't use it as an excuse to not get back on.

Every meal you have that's healthy, or every time you resist an unhealthy snack, that's one step closer to your goal.

Whatever you do it needs to be sustainable so saying you'll never have a bad meal again won't work, it's not sustainable, but get back on it for the next meal!

Yeh you are so right. I need to get out of the mindset that I need to plan my week perfectly, all calorie counted etc.

Would something like 16:8 or 5:2 be more manageable for you? Not requiring the same sort of restrictions?

Keep in mind as you read this that it's easier to dish advice out than take it!

There'll be people come on who advise you to cut out one thing or eat another, but the real secret I think is flipping it somehow so eating sensibly is what you want/choose.
I lost some weight recently (much needed), and this was so thrilling for me that I found I didn't want to snack or binge.

Are you exercising?
That plus eating more healthily will help.

Good luck

Thsnk you. My motivation to exercise is just as rubbish.i go to the gym but don't really know what I'm doing.

I couldn't inject myself!

Hello!
I’ve found the best thing that helps is..
Drink lots of water. eat slowly and mindfully. Stop when you are full.
be REALLY over the top encouraging to yourself, as if you were talking to your very bestest chum or little daughter. So you say, ‘well done! You had one cake and stopped! Well done for not eating 2!
remind yourself of how healthy and energetic you will feel.
you’ve got this x

No need to do the saxenda thing, a glass of water will often fill you up as we think we are hungry but it’s thirst.
My motivation is rubbish and I don’t go to the gym so you are well ahead of the curve!
obv. Treat yourself to a personal trainer occasionally?
I think the smallest movement helps, baby steps!

I did a couch-to-5k and found that even a tiny amount of running in the morning made me feel less hungry throughout the day (which is the opposite of what I expected). I set a goal a few months ago to run at least 3 times a week, even if it’s literally only 1.5km. I printed off an annual calendar, and I put a highlighter mark every day I run. I’ve basically made myself a sticker chart, and amazingly it motivates me in exactly the way it motivates my toddlers! Maybe you could try something similar. Commit to not boredom-snack 4 or 5 days a week. Give yourself a sticker when you’re successful. If you have more healthy days than unhealthy days, you’ll begin to feel the difference. And if you aren’t aiming for perfection, then there’s no such thing as “falling off the wagon”!

That's all really good advice. I would love to run but have plantar fastitis, so painful!
I almost feel like I don't know what I should be eating anymore!!

Don't think of it as black and white/all or nothing eating

As long as you eat better than the day before, you're doing better every day

I hear you, OP - so much advice on what to eat from so many quarters. It's like food is the magic fix or cure-all. Its not really. Maybe it helps to avoid really processed foods, but that's about all I'd really bet on.

If you absolutely couldn't boredom eat what would you choose to do?

Good question. Probable have a cuppa.

If you can afford it see a therapist. It's usually a mental thing

Gillian Riley's work on Eating Less is now available on line, a really interesting approach on how to stop overeating. Based on her earlier work helping people to give up other addictions such as smoking.

www.eatinglessonline.com

Lots of material on her website. Hope you find it interesting

I do this, I eat to my good calorie limit and then for some reason end up totally sabotaging at the end of the day. I have taken up crochet as a great way to keep my hands occupied and also an making myself drink a larger glass of water every hour as I find when Im thirsty I start looking through the snack cupboard too. Watching with interest for other advice

I feel as though I need to be 100% good about my eating, and if I fall off the wagon I lose all motivation to get back on it.

You need to remember that you don’t need to be 100% ‘good’. In fact, you need to stop thinking of foods as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. Some foods are more nutritious but they can all play a part in a balanced diet.

I used to be exactly like you so I know how difficult it is to sort your diet out. The first step is understanding that you just need to be consistent.

Track your calories (and use an online calculator to work out how many you should be eating per day). Then track your calories weekly, not daily - this gives you more flexibility. So some days you might eat 1600 cals, other days you might eat 1900.

Go for healthier choices most of the time. Have some foods that you enjoy every day, just in moderation. E.g. I used to eat a huge sharing bag of chocolate most nights. Now I have a small chocolate bar instead.

It’s a BIG life change. You’ve spent your entire life eating what you want, when you want. But you are in control of it.

Perfection isn't possible for normal humans.

Eat healthily and well 80% of the time, let the other 20% be the not so healthy but craved for treats.

Eating lots of protein and good fats keeps you fuller. Carbs give energy but can affect your blood sugar, especially white/processed carbs. Find a balance that works for you without leaving you tired or hyper.

Think about if eating a food makes you feel full an hour later or restless, irritable, bloated, tummy pain or craving more. Then those foods are not suiting you, whatever they are.

Drink lots of water.

Ask at your gym for an induction programme, so a staff member shows you what to do and gives you a plan to follow.

The weight didn't go on in one go, so it won't come off in one week. Look at monthly totals to see progress.

I was the same. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to do a huge change in one go. So did little things.

parked further away when shopping so had to walk further.
went on a small walk everyday. Sometimes it was just round to the shop and back. But more moving than I was doing before.
started switching to lower calorie options.
when snacking I started eating things like strawberries with some sugar instead of a huge bar of chocolate etc.
i would also pop some chewing gum into my mouth after eating. Kept my mouth busy and i don’t like mint tasting food. So didn’t eat anything else after.

the little things I was doing started to help then I started making bigger changes.

Thank you. Ideas for healthy eating would be good!

I've been in your place. No amount of different diets or distractions worked for me. Boredom and/or comfort eating always broke through. In the end, I went for counselling, which finally worked. I did a lot of work with the counsellor about why I turned to food, why that was my go-to comfort, and how I could change the mental pattern.

That sounds really good..is there anything you can share as I couldn't afford counselling

Not really because it was all specific to me and my life, so it would be different for you. My counselling was free! I self-referred to a counsellor that my GP recommended. Speak to your GP and see if they have anyone to go for free.