Keep seeing 'my mum' everywhere since she died, does this happen to everyone?

[Arewerelated]

In work today and for a good 3 seconds thought I saw my mum having a peruse through brochures and things. To the extent that I made eye contact with this lady, gave her a big cheesy grin and took a couple of steps towards her before I remembered that she died last year.

This happens nearly every day, or example I see a lady with a similar hair cut and height, wearing a coat my mum owned and my heart lifts for a couple of seconds before I remember again.

It's just thrown me today how long it lasted for before my brain kicked in.
Does this happen to everyone? How do you cope with it? It's been almost a year since she died and when this happens I become tearful all over again

Ah... Yes. It does stop, eventually.

Yep, sympathies. Four years here and I still have the occasional heart-stopping moment.

Funnily enough I was thinking about this only this afternoon as I thought I saw a colleague who actually died a couple of years ago. There's an awful lot of short bald blokes in glasses with dark beards out there, and I keep doing a double take only to remember that he's not with us any more.

Yes, I've had that with my dad. It's an absolute blow to the solar plexus when it happens.

My dm died in 2006.

l still think l see her😟

Yes. Sometimes I see my Dad in the physical similarities of other men his age when he died, or sometimes just similar clothes. Over ten years now and my brain still goes, 'Dad' before my rest of my brain kicks me less than a heartbeat later and then I'm just stood there like a numpty trying not to cry in WHSmiths.

I was once looking out my window and thought I saw my mum coming up the bridle path at the back of my house. I put the kettle on and went to open the door for her.

it was just my heart playing tricks on me.

Im sorry you’ve lost your darling mum. 💐

Yeap and it hurts like hell.

I had this for a while after my mum died. One lady I saw looked so much like her I nearly went over!. The strangest thing is when it’s my mums birthday I always bump into one of her friends. Also on the first anniversary of her death I was at the dentists sitting in the chair and her funeral song (not very common) came on the radio

Yes this happens to me too.
less now a few years on but was regularly at the start

Sorry to hear about your mum 💐
My dad passed away eight years ago and for the first few years I thought I'd glimpsed him whilst out and about. For me I think it was wanting to see him again and have a chat I was in a state of disbelief for a long time.
More recently, my brother came for a visit and I hadn't realised he was already in our house. When i returned home I was just staring at him open mouthed as he looked identical to my dad, sitting with the same mannerisms and wearing the sort of shirt my dad would wear. It was almost like I couldn't work out why my dad was in the house. It was really weird as I hadn't spotted any 'look a likes' for a while and it really threw me.

Yes, every time I go down our high street I see my Dad. He died two years ago. And after my beloved aunt died, for years, every time I saw a blonde woman in a red coat I thought it was her.

I’ve had it too, my heart stops when I realise. I remember ‘seeing’ my dad at the shop, Christmas time his favourite time of year and sobbed and abandoned my shopping that day.

Oh, this thread is heartbreaking. So many beautiful and sad descriptions of your experiences of grief. It’s also so lovely to read because it speaks of how loved these people were.

I lost my mum and dad in quick succession and yes, I ‘saw’ both of them lots of times in the years that followed.

Sorry for your losses everybody. 💐

Before Xmas in 2019 I was in a pub and thought I saw my stepdad walk in - I actually thought, oh, there's Bob, didn't know he was coming here tonight I'll go and say hi. He died in 2011, so strange, the guy just really looked like him.

I'm really sorry for your loss.

I see my brother everywhere as there's a lot of burly blond men around.

I ended up glaring at one in a pub, absolutely incensed he had the temerity to look like DB from behind.

I saw him driving a car the other day and nearly rear ended the car in front. I really hope it wears off.

I often see "my mum". I visit a client who looks just like her and I find myself looking at her with a smile. I'll be gutted when our work comes to an end.

Also, my horrible exes dad died earlier this year and I absolutely loved him. He was a really special man. I see "him" several times a week, every time my heart does a little flip and I have an instant smile

Yes. I lost my sister 9 months ago and I get this too. Not daily, but I do occasionally do a double take when I walk past people in the street.

I ‘saw’ my mum ahead of me in M and S once, she’d been dead 3 years by this point. It is most unsettling.

This poem by Patrick Kavanagh puts the phenomenon best

Memory of my Father

Every old man I see
Reminds me of my father
When he had fallen in love with death
One time when sheaves were gathered.

That man I saw in Gardner Street
Stumbled on the kerb was one,
He stared at me half-eyed,
I might have been his son.

And I remember the musician
Faltering over his fiddle
In Bayswater, London,
He too set me the riddle.

Every old man I see
In October-coloured weather
Seems to say to me:
"I was once your father."

Yes. It’s coming up to my DH’s anniversary and I stopped dead the other day, convinced the man walking in the distance was him.
Happened a lot in the early days. I’m sorry for your loss.

Yes. :(
Anyone from a distance with the same posture, similar hair, a coat like hers etc. still makes me cry.

I was only thinking about this earlier, as I experienced this when my parents died. I have found myself asking other people about this and they've had the same thing happen.

The other thing is that even though my parents died about 14 years ago, I sometimes wake up in the night and think that they are still alive and are in my home.

Yes our brains are wired to see familiar faces in other people/objects (Jesus in toast syndrome). It does stop eventually.

A couple of years after my Mum died I went to a local Firework display on Guy Fawkes night, and there was a woman standing a few feet in front of me who was the absolute spit of my mother from behind. Had the same jacket and hair and build... I purposely avoided moving so I could see her face, and spent the fireworks feeling as though I was sharing it with her. I left a little bit before they finished so that the illusion wasn't spoiled.

Yes, and it's horrible. I remember thinking I'd ring my mum about something, then remembering she'd died a few weeks before. It does stop, eventually