Are women over the age of 35 made to feel ‘past it’?

[Sussex34]

Since I turned 35 I feel as though everything I see on the internet / TV is designed to make women over this age feel old. Whether it’s really subliminal in memes on instagram or the way women are described in the media, it’s like 35 is the cut off for where you’re suddenly on a downhill trajectory.

I am lucky to be surrounded by amazing older women in my life - my mum is 70 and acts and looks like she’s in her late 50s, and I just don’t agree with this notion! I still feel really young in myself, but social media has made me start obsessing over time passing really quickly and getting older. Does anyone else feel the same? Is the only option to delete social media?!

Well social media is generally bullshit, so...

I don't know about social media as I don't use it and don't watch TV either, but I have never felt 'past it' and I'm 50. If I were you, I'd bin the social media. What joy is it bringing you?

I do feel a bit like since hitting my late 30s certain people in certain situations do write me off/treat me differently. It's mainly in work. But then I had my second child at 35. I was part time to work around childcare. So I think people wrote me off as 'mum who wasn't interested in work as much as her kids' rather than my age.

I have seen things on social media about over 30s being old, mainly in relation to hobbies. The undercurrent being that any woman over 30 who still has hobbies is sad because she should be too busy with doing everything for her husband and kids to ever want to do something for herself.

I'm 39 and don't feel "past it". Depends where you look I guess.

By whom? I'm 43 and I'm not written off by anybody.

In saying that, I mix mostly with my peer group by +/- 10 years and dabble with social media at most, so not Life By Instagram.

The choice is yours, OP.

Blimey OP I'm 57 and I dont feel past it!!
I've just been promoted at work, I have a busy social life with my friends aged between 32 and 61, there's always something to do, new fashion to try out, new bands to discover, places to go, films being being released etc. I haven't got enough days in the week to do everything I want.
I certainly dont feel overlooked or invisible n society.

I have seen things on social media about over 30s being old, mainly in relation to hobbies. The undercurrent being that any woman over 30 who still has hobbies is sad because she should be too busy with doing everything for her husband and kids to ever want to do something for herself
I literally have never seen anything like that!!

Just wait till you get to 50.

Every advert on telly shows you as either in need of incontinence pants, or worried about funeral costs.

I don’t let anyone else tell me how to feel, least of all how to feel about myself. Social media, advertising and so on don’t feature in the things which give me value, so frankly I don’t care what vacuous points are being made there or elsewhere. I get my self worth from the values I hold, what I do, the contribution I make, whether I make other people feel good about themselves, and whether I am kind and supportive to other people. I’m over 50 and feel very happy within myself and consider that I am a good and valuable person.

Don’t let anyone else undermine your own self worth. It’s not theirs to give or withhold.

Not yet. Could be tomorrow I suppose.

The trick is not too give a shite and get on with being fabulous ✨️

I'm 42, I listen to a lot of audiobooks and have recently noticed a few where a woman in her late 30s/early 40s will be given a sort of 'old lady' voice, some of the descriptions of women who are younger than me also involve some reference to them 'getting on a bit now'.

It's just not how I see myself. I'm not exactly Jennifer Lopez or anything but I don't think of myself as 'old' and I don't see why I shouldn't wear shorts over 35 or whatever bullshit. I get a lot of targeted stuff on Instagram now as well about 'style in your 40s' and it's more the way my MIL dresses at 70!

I disagree but I don't spend any time on TicTock or Insta, it's for younger people and so it's going to feel very different.

I watch GMTV some mornings, they have middle-aged female presenters like Kate Garraway and Lorraine, I don't love Lorraine but she's not young, this week t was Carol Vorderman who is 60 I think or round about.

Just don't watch things designed for young people and you will feel a lot better about yourself, there's a market for everything demographically so find your space. I feel fine about being in my early fifties.

And don't forget retirement villages!

It depends what you’re looking at on social media ; on tv programmes I’ve noticed a lot of women come into their own in the roles they’re in post 30.
In my line of work I find the same

I'm early forties' and I have never felt like that. I have social media. I've never felt better about myself.

Given that nearly 50% of women over 50 leak or are incontinent, it's not a bad thing to have specifically designed adverts for them. Mind you, I watch ITV3 quite often and that does seem designed for the 'older adult' but l love Miss Marple so who cares?!

I'm over 60 and don't feel past it yet!

My knees and hips remind me from time to time that I'm no longer 25 - or indeed 35. But other than that, everything is fine.

Yes: there is loads of age discrimination at work and in relationships, even in some social circles…

I think with work choosing an employer where there is less ageism can help (mainly of lots of senior/highly regarded people are older) & also not being forthcoming about your age

Relationships: all you can do is try to stay fit & healthy and look for/ be with a man who wants a partner not a trophy

Staying away from people & social media that gives you negative messaging is always healthy!

I always thought 25 was the start of the slide .You hear of young adults classed as 18 - 25 . So what's after that ?

I've not seen anything like this in relation to age.

Of course, as a MOTHER you should spend 24 hours a day with your kids and how can you have any "family time" if you are so self-indulgent as to partake in a hobby. But that's about being a mum, not about being over 30.

And the channel Yesterday which has ads for an over 50s dating app all the time (or rather they sponsor the section).

Wait till you are sixty, I might as well go out now and dig my own grave!! I am irrelevant now, just a silly old woman, except when it comes to my own money then every body seems to want to put there penny’s worth in to what I should do with my house and my money, and my pension.

I am 41 and if anything have been more visible and “celebrated” by society than ever. I’m regularly called things i find irritating like MILF or cougar, asked out by younger men, shouted at in the street. I don’t feel past it, I feel like I now fit some kind of hot older woman trope, and my personality is very much secondary to “how good I look for my age” and it’s tiresome and shallow and feels like a put down.

Although on a personal level I feel I have both a creaky attitude and creaky knee’s.

I don't pay attention to adverts/tv to be honest. I'm 35 and certainly feel passed it with gps. Ten years ago it was sent for a pregnancy test for ANYTHING, now it's "oh you must be stressed/anxious/tired" NAW.