Could anything have incentivised you to have more children?

[Echobelly]

Following excerpts from this demented article about how the birth rate might be upped in the UK ('get a telegram from the Queen when you have a third child!'): twitter.com/rhiannonlucyc/status/1543475834769522688

along with the SCOTUS ruling the other week, it got me thinking about how all ideas about how to get birth rates higher seem to involve 'Demanding women give their whole lives to childbearing and giving them a pat on the back for being good breeders' and how it never seems to involve anything that would actually make it easier for women to have children and thrive as full human beings.

I have to say, if there were free or heavily subidised childcare available I would probably have had a third, but I couldn't face that long under the burden on childcare costs (although there is the 'needing a larger car and house' issue as well). Could any subsidy or offer from government have encouraged you to have more children than you are planning/have?

But you understand my point?

Why is 2 children deemed acceptable?

If they wanted the birth rate to increase the government would Increase maternity pay
Increase wages so that families could manage comfortably on one wage & one parent stay at home
Remove the two child cap on benefits & the income limits on Child Benefit
Increase Child Benefit
Increase free childcare
Improve maternity care
Improve maternity wards in hospital, single ensuite rooms, allow fathers to stay during hospital stay.
Empower women to have more say in their treatment in hospital
Increase staffing levels in hospital so women get the care they deserve instead of inadequate care.

We have 3, I would have loved a big family and would have happily had more if we didn’t have to worry about finances. Pregnancy and hideous births were a small price to pay for the reward (for me, I know it’s different for everyone). As it happens it would be too risky for me to have more children anyway. I would love to foster in the future.

A one off 180k payment deposited in my account for each child. Free childcare (both day and night) on tap. And free schooling. Universal healthcare (including teeth). If all that was a given I'd be willing to consider it.

Similar to PPs...

Better maternity pay, at least 12m, including more paid leave for men on a use it or loose it basis.

Free childcare hours from 1.

Better maternity care.

More support for flexible working so you can return to work part time, some measures to limit the impact having a baby has on a women's career/pension- lower pay etc. I'm sure Pregnant then Screwed could offer some good advice on this area.

Increased child benefit for working parents? Just something to make having children more affordable.

A letter from the Queen hahahahahaha no!

From the original article it's almost like no one thought to ask a woman.... 🤔

One to replace each parent.

However you need a small number of women to have 3 or 4 children as a population replacement rate is 2.1

One to replace each parent.

But as you say that relies on every woman wanting to be a mother & they don't.

I would happily have a 3rd if the NHS funded my dh’s vasectomy reversal

We both really want another baby, but we can’t afford to have it reversed privately

Some women in the UK already have 3,4 plus children but it doesn't make up for those that chose not too as replacement rate is still under 2.1.

Nope. I absolutely hated being pregnant so there is nothing that would have persuaded me to do that again. Plus ex-DH was very much the one who wanted kids in the first place then did naff all when DS was born. I didn’t sign up to be a domestic drudge.

We have one purely because we couldn’t afford another round of nursery fees. So free childcare and a rise in the amount you can earn before you lose your child benefit.

"By 2100 over 80s will outnumber under 5s around the world by two to one. As fertility falls and life expectancy increases worldwide, the number of children under 5 years old is forecasted to decline by 41% from 681 million in 2017 to 401 million in 2100, whilst the number of individuals older than 80 years is projected to increase six fold, from 141 million to 866 million."

"23 nations – including Spain and Japan – could see their populations halve by the year 2100."

I can't see how this is economical sustainable.

Really really well paid maternity leave and equivalent paternity pay too. Along with employers that don’t penalise women or men for taking time out to have dc.

Ultimately though I wouldn’t want more dc (I have 2). I worry a lot about what their future will be like - environmentally, financially, politically. I also feel so lucky to have the 2 I do and each new child changes the lives of those already here; I don’t feel like entering the baby lottery again because of the impact it could have on the dc I already have.

I only ever wanted two children, but I would have had them earlier and closer together if childcare was more affordable. Even with both of us on reasonable salaries we couldn’t afford two sets of nursery fees so waited until DD1 was 4 before trying for DD2.

Pay me the equivalent of the average wage to stay at home and look after them until they reach 18.

Actually the population is in decline. We have a lower birthrate and ageing population.

www.weforum.org/agenda/2021/12/world-population-growth-decline-un/

Much better healthcare for women.

The number of women suffering complications during pregnancy & birth is shocking. There needs to be more research and investment to help prevent and treat problems.

I couldn’t risk further injury by having a 3rd.

I wanted 1 originally but went on to have four. That was absolutely enough for me, but I was lucky enough to be able to be aSAHM for7 years and now DC come to school with me (teacher private school). I live in Switzerland where the population is declining and often get congratulated on my brood, it's seen as a good thing.

That said, childcare is soooo expensive (hence I stopped working) and maternity is 14-16 weeks (depending on canton). But having a larger family comes with considerable tax reductions, and university costs aren't high here.

I live in France, where childcare is much cheaper, maternity care is much better, and there are financial incentives for having a third child. (Paying less tax, longer paid maternity leave for the third child, "large family card" which I think gets you discounts on things.)

Even so, I'm about 95% sure we will stop after two, for all the same reasons other people stop after two.

I have 3 DCs (3rd one was very much an “oops” baby, but I’d never be without her! Best drunken oops ever!), and am crippled by the cost of childcare during school holidays.
If I had heavily subsidised year round childcare, an enormous household income where money is never a concern, and having paid help in the form of a cleaner and a nanny, I would happily have enough DCs to form my own 5-a-side team with a couple of subs.
But as it goes, I’m now a single parent, who hasn’t got a pot to piss in, and 3 DCs is barely financially manageable.

No, nothing could have incentivised me, certainly not a telegram from the Queen (WTAF??). If we'd wanted a third DC we'd have had one. We didn't, ergo we stopped at two.

No, as I would want more than two and I don’t think we could meet the needs of more than two children. Either way wouldn’t increase the birth rate.

There are so many things that could make parenting a little easier and more attractive.

Childcare is a huge issue, ita expensive, nursery staff often have poor working conditions and many just don’t value them, you sometimes see people on here claiming staff will be poor if they’re young. Looking after a large group of young children day in and day out that aren’t your own is hard work. We need both better subsidies for parents and better conditions for staff.

Leave being fair, at the moment adoption leave is not treated equally, which is shit, especially as you generally do need 12 months off, where as not everyone needs 12 months after having a baby. The whole leave system needs a complete overhaul, part of that is employers! We’ve shared our leave 50/50 and it took almost six months for my husbands employer to even figure out what to do for him to have six months off. In the end using their policies we had to work it all out for them.

Nope!! 2 and done.