Could anything have incentivised you to have more children?

[Echobelly]

Following excerpts from this demented article about how the birth rate might be upped in the UK ('get a telegram from the Queen when you have a third child!'): twitter.com/rhiannonlucyc/status/1543475834769522688

along with the SCOTUS ruling the other week, it got me thinking about how all ideas about how to get birth rates higher seem to involve 'Demanding women give their whole lives to childbearing and giving them a pat on the back for being good breeders' and how it never seems to involve anything that would actually make it easier for women to have children and thrive as full human beings.

I have to say, if there were free or heavily subidised childcare available I would probably have had a third, but I couldn't face that long under the burden on childcare costs (although there is the 'needing a larger car and house' issue as well). Could any subsidy or offer from government have encouraged you to have more children than you are planning/have?

Nothing the world is overpopulated. We are facing a ticking time bomb. I strongly believe they will legalise euthanasia in future due to lack of carers not because the government want to give people the choice. Currently people can live for 10 years with multiple comorbidities and complex care needs.

Extremely poor maternity care in last pg - putting mine and child life at completely unnecessary risk meant - despite considering another we could never actually face it again.

Once youngest got older we were glad we stopped at three - shear expense and housing - we have a four bed house so they do have their own rooms and space - I grew up sharing in three bed house with three children and didn't see this as an issue growing up.

If things had worked out differently - not being let go in first pg - and had managed to keep my career going and got to a point I enjoyed - I seriously doubt we'd have had as many as three children.

From what I've gathered these little evidence that any countries have manage to increase birth rates - they can with some polices get slight boosts but no-one's found the magic answer yet.

That's bonkers. So if you decide you don't want more children/can't afford them a telegram from the Queen would swing it? 😂
Two's enough for me. One hand each for crossing the road. Max of 2 cars to buy when they reach 18, two sets of university fees, house deposits etc!
Also the environmental aspect. That suggests the royal family are not at all interested in reducing the impact.

Cheaper and more convenient childcare, actually getting child benefit (we don’t anymore as DH earns “too much” which is a joke as that threshold is very low now) and CB for a third kid.

I was unable to have more than one, and wouldn’t have wanted more than two under any circumstances - there’s a limit to how much you can divide your attention and for me, two ways would be my limit.

But things that would make a difference for those who might others have three:

Two years’ maternity leave, and free or heavily subsidised nursery from age 2 - having three under 5 honestly sounds like hell, without having to lose your career as well (nursery spaces for under 2s are £1500-2000 per month around here - not affordable if you have more than one).

Affordable housing - we are in a two bedroom flat in London. A three bedroom house would be twice as expensive, a four bedroom house would be three times as expensive. Not many people have £1.5m in their back pocket.

Same, i felt like nothing but a mum and worse nothing but a single mum for years.
Nothing that could realistically have been offered would have made me want a third.

Even in a "fantasty scenario" where somebody gave me a house and 2 million i would have baulked at another pregnancy/labour & more responsibility!

"Killing off" older people who have terminal illness, can't feed themselves, go to the toilet, move or recognise their relatives, who signed a consent form when compus mentus, is different.

Not in the UK no. Motherhood just isn't valued enough here.

It all feels a bit dystopian though with the ruling in the US & I read China are so worried & their 3 child policy hasn't took off so "forced procreation" may be a thing

The biggest differences for me would be:
Lower house prices/rent
Improved maternity pay (we have great time off in UK but shocking bad statutory pay compared to most EU countries)
Way improved SEND provision in schools, so I’m not having to fight for my autistic child’s basic needs all the time.

Exactly right now we wait for people to starve to death which isn't humane.

I would like my child care costs to be fully tax deductible to reflect that they are an essential cost of working.

• Properly funded childcare from age 1
• Better paternity pay
• More affordable housing (I live in the SE)

Surrogates are allowed to claim upto about £20k in "expenses" are they? So in order to be a paid breeder I would need at least that for the pregnancy, then maybe £30k per year until the youngest was in school. And after that I would need easy access to flexible childcare. Plus a paid allowance to acknowledge the ball-ache of constantly liaising with school, after school club, childminder, babysitter (all of which I need for wrap around care - I'm a teacher, so school holidays are mostly fine, except INSET days, but the early mornings and late night parents' evenings are a nightmare to cover, especially on a teacher's salary)

How much do you get paid for fostering in the UK these days?

The planet is overpopulated, no one should be having more than 2 children wether they can afford them or not the planet can't support them

We should be discouraging people from having three children, not incentivising them! Climate change is a serious issue and we can't just pretend that it doesn't exist.

Yes, the ageing population is a concern, but at a global level, the planet is still over populated and we should not be contributing to that. We should be changing attitudes towards immigration rather than encouraging people to have more babies that the planet cannot support.

If life was like it was in my grandparents day, and we could live on one full time wage, and buy a house, then I'd have a bucket load. I'm expecting our 3rd (a surprise) and we're worried about the cost of everything with 3.

Probably not. I value my health. 2 dc's was enough.
Maybe a third if I was very rich, but on 'normal' money I was not risking it.

This article suggests it's more than just financial - as South Korea has tried that but more about much more equal parenting and flexible working

How do you convince people to have babies?

So making child rearing less a burden on mothers.

I listened to a piece of radio 4 PM about children still being less active than before corvid lockdowns and based on our area I assumed it was because many groups still hadn't started back up or children weren't accessing ones. Yet the "experts" couldn't understand it and had loads of "fun" time intensive activities - like setting up a jungle playground with house furniture in garden that mothers could do - no consideration most mothers may be working prioritising catching kids up with school work or otherwise busy or exhausted and no mention of Dad's in entire peice.

Recent health for woman person appointment all her interviews were about widening free access to IVF -I heard nothing about menopause, maternity care and how poor it can be, access to contraceptives delays in diagnosis even for female only diseases like endometriosis let alone differently presented common women ailments.

So I'm unsurprised at dropping birth rate and think it will continue.

They should increase child benefit, it is very low in this country. Or at least make the amount you get for 2nd+ the same as first.
I think they should scrap the child support limit for only 2 children with CTC/UC. It is larger families that are struggling the most at the moment.

Not even 100% income tax on the childless would convince me to have one, let alone three. Childfree and very happy that way. Funny how these men never think of a big societal push to promote more involved parenting from fathers isn’t it!

But that's more what they should do ethically to support larger families as the cist of living arises.
I am well and truly done with having babies. I don't think they should coax or bribe people into more. However there should be a fairer system of financial support

Nothing on earth would have persuaded me to have more than 2.

I think they need to look more at WHY women, now we have the choice, often really don't want many children.

I wanted my body back as quickly as possible.
The money we've spent on childcare has been eye watering.
Even with 2 parents, I'm still the default parent. Even though dh is the more caring one.
Those years of juggling it all and feeling like falling at it all.

The planet is overpopulated, no one should be having more than 2 children wether they can afford them or not the planet can't support them

Which countries shouldn't be having more than 2 dc?

Countries don't have children

People do

?