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Original poster

DD letting herself out car seat while I’m driving

63 replies

Pinkwellies81 · 28/06/2022 18:20

Can anyone recommend a lock or device to stop her undoing her car seat?
she’s just turned 4 and knows it’s naughty but keeps doing it as she thinks it’s funny (obviously it’s not)

OP posts:
whosaidtha · 28/06/2022 18:22

I bought a little Velcro thing of Amazon. 100% sure he could have still undone it as it was so thin but it seemed to stop him even trying.

Justmuddlingalong · 28/06/2022 18:25

I would stop the car, saying we were waiting for the police because it wasn't allowed to travel without seat belts on.

5zeds · 28/06/2022 18:25

stop The car every time and tell her off

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Squashpocket · 28/06/2022 18:27

I know it's not always possible, but when they started doing this I'm afraid I just put the fear of god in them. Immediately stopped the car, made a massive deal about how dangerous it was and how the police would tell us off if mummy was driving without them strapped in (which is true), refused to move the car until they were belted back in, going on about how we're going to miss soft play if they don't get buckled in etc. etc.

This is just one of those lines in the sand my dc know not to cross...

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/06/2022 18:27

Is she in a 5point harness or the seat belt of the car?

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 28/06/2022 18:29

I had to use gaffer tape and a pair of scissors 🙄 he broke through 2 locks.

Original poster
Pinkwellies81 · 28/06/2022 18:30

Yes I stop the car, and tell her we’re not moving until she calms down and sits nicely. But I’m worried about her getting out the seat & trying to jump on me if I’m on a motorway or road where I can’t instantly stop

OP posts:
Original poster
Pinkwellies81 · 28/06/2022 18:33

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz she’s in her car seat which has its own 5 point harness

OP posts:
SeemsSoUnfair · 28/06/2022 18:34

Unless there is SEN involved she is absolutely old enough at 4 to be told how dangerous it is, for you to be cross enough that she doesn't think it is funny and to up the consequences until she does get it.

whiteroseredrose · 28/06/2022 18:38

Probably not recommended but both of mine did that. In the end I drove slowly into our cul-de-sac and then slammed on the brakes.

Both of course came out of their seats, not hurt but shocked. I explained that that was why they had to stay strapped in - next time they might fly through the windscreen. They never did it again, and were very insistent that FIL strap in every time he got in the car.

CornishTiger · 28/06/2022 18:39

How heavy is she? In Kg.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 28/06/2022 18:41

My dd went through this and we had to really tell her off and state what could happen and she did stop

AdoraBell · 28/06/2022 18:43

No advice re a lock, but I agree what others suggested, stop the car and refuse to move off until the strap/harness etc is done up properly again.

One of mine opened the car door while I was driving on a motorway, think she was about 6 at the time. I was almost at the exit I needed so following my immediate reaction once we were home I told her she wasn’t going to school again or days out/friends house because I would not drive the car with her in it. I emailed her teacher, said that she was ill, kept her off school the next day, that got the point across.

Smartiepants79 · 28/06/2022 18:45

There is such a thing as the Houdini strap which is supposed to stop them escaping.
At 4 she’s really should be old enough to be trusted to stay in the seat! What happens when she unstraps?

Smartiepants79 · 28/06/2022 18:46

Oh and child locks on the doors!!!

HaveTeaWillSurvive · 28/06/2022 18:47

It’s not ‘naughty’ it’s a hard line no. I think you need to ramp up the telling off - I have properly roared at my DS a sum total of two times, once for this and once for running off towards a busy road. It only ever happened once. we’re a very non shouty / explain everything parenting type household but things that could get them killed are occasion for shock and awe tactics imo.

WeAreBob · 28/06/2022 18:49

No softly softly with this one. I went the way of PP and put the fear of God in them. They got a bollocking for it until they didnt think it was funny anymore.

RandomQuest · 28/06/2022 18:51

Squashpocket · 28/06/2022 18:27

I know it's not always possible, but when they started doing this I'm afraid I just put the fear of god in them. Immediately stopped the car, made a massive deal about how dangerous it was and how the police would tell us off if mummy was driving without them strapped in (which is true), refused to move the car until they were belted back in, going on about how we're going to miss soft play if they don't get buckled in etc. etc.

This is just one of those lines in the sand my dc know not to cross...

Yes this. Mine did it once not longer after she went into a booster seat and I don’t think she’d ever dare do it again. Unless there are additional needs or you haven’t properly told her off, at 4 she really should get it’s not something you do, comparable with jumping off the pavement into the path of a bus.

Otherwise you could look into a chest clip. They’re a legal requirement on all harnessed seats in the US, and it would be really hard for a kid to escape one, although there’s some debate about their safety if wrongly placed.

Fabulousfanny69 · 28/06/2022 18:52

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ColmanFlamingo · 28/06/2022 19:01

DD did this, also climbed out of three different high chairs or tried! This was all under 2 and it wasn't part of a tantrum she was just a very energetic and tiny child, with very flexible skinny shoulders!
After she did it on the M4 I ended up getting a Mamas and Papas Cybex... I have no idea if they still have them or if they're considered safe these days but it was a godsend at the time.
Also when I was researching it for her I remember that the clips you can buy to clip across their chests can hurt them in an accident.

MintJulia · 28/06/2022 19:06

I had pulled over onto the hard shoulder because DS had unclipped himself again. A police car pulled up to see if we were ok, and one of the officers came and explained to DS (aged4) that he was making his mum break the law and she might get arrested.

DS' eyes were like saucers, 😁

motogirl · 28/06/2022 19:09

By 4 mine used high backed boosters with the normal seatbelt, they couldn't undo the seatbelt themselves due to the design

ZeroFuchsGiven · 28/06/2022 19:10

Control Your child! at 4 she knows full well between right and wrong!

berksandbeyond · 28/06/2022 19:13

You can't add anything extra to a car seat, it isn't safe.
At 4 she can understand and I would be coming down hard on this one and refusing to go anywhere in the car until she stopped it to be quite honest

2bazookas · 28/06/2022 19:17

Tell her there;s a consequence. If she undoes her seat belt, there will be no TV or screens or sweets that day. Carry it through.

If you were taking her somewhere she wanted to go (park. softplay) buckle her back in and drive straight home.