Things you do when no one is looking

[Novasmum]

Sometimes I think I’m strange or childish because I do these things when no one is around but surely people do things when no ones looking either 😂

Dance in the house
Make all sorts of expressions in the mirror
Lay on the floor after a long day
Put the bread knife back in the draw because bread is ‘clean’ 😳

your turn.

Picking spots, picking my nose (and sometimes eating it- does anyone else?). Twisting pubes into dreads.
Farting
Masturbating
Farting while masturbating.

Do drugs behind my husbands back. For pain relief.

I do that with washing!

Sit with my hands in my pants
Pick my nose
Sniff my armpits
Sing and dance an entire monologue of what I'm doing like I'm in a Broadway musical, this alongside general nutty dancing to whatever music is on
Bark like a dog, make animal noises
Act out scenes from books and stories in my head
Crawl up and down the stairs
Tell the TV off for being rubbish.
Visibly enjoy the smell of my farts :)

I'm basically off my head on my own and rather disgusting :)

I do this too 😂😂 mines recently just told me he’s actually seen me do this in the reflection of the window 🤣🤣🙈

did any one see City of Angels with Nicholas Cage, say theres an angel in the room watching when you do all these things, loved the one where the window cleaner was watching though

Make up songs to sing to my cat. Mostly about how she's the beautifullest sweetiepie in the whole world.

Masturbate. I have a really high sex drive, I'm told. I doubt I've missed a day in years. Even if I'm ill, sad, tired, busy.... there's always time for a quick one off the wrist!

Have full conversations or arguments with people in the car. They're not there. It's often things I wish I'd had the opportunity to say. But it's very cathartic.

Bite all the skin off around my nails

Sing. Loudly and happily.

Sing songs on voice notes and play them back or have a full on conversation to listen how I sound like to others

I work in a shop, it’s my own shop and it’s a little shop so I’m the only staff member there. If I have a rude, awkward or obnoxious customer, I pull faces at them and flick the V sign with both hands at their departing back as they head out of the door. I would add that I’m always very polite and helpful and I NEVER do this if there is anyone else to see me do it - but there’s usually at least one person in a week that I would put into a ‘special’ category and I can’t help myself. I saw Jeremy Clarkson do the same thing to someone on Clarkson’s Farm last year and felt slightly aggrieved that it was no longer ‘my’ thing!

Wipe my finger under my arm/under boob/in belly button and have a sniff

Pick my nose and eat my bogies

Talk to myself/the dog/the cat

Fart as much and as loud as I want

Cut all my food up before I sit down so I can shovel it in my gob with one fork while I use the other hand to look through my phone

Watch porn

I bought a proper wooden back scratcher on holiday a few years back.

It's my favourite thing in the entire house.

Fold random pieces of paper into long, pointy triangles and then twiddle them up my nose until I sneeze - and repeat for about six good quality sneezes. I love sneezing.

if no paper is around then a hair grip or anything long, thin and pointy. I have tried an interdental brush a couple of times but they’re too furry.

@anothernamedoesntsmellsosweet me too with the daydream world! I find it really relaxing and comforting somehow?
Never admitted it to anyone but I'm so glad it's not just me!!

Omg I do this too! It's wonderful and You can have a real god nose blow afterwards too

Omg I didn't realise that other people out there hands down their pants to relax. Not in a sexual way but I do this without realising.

I

Posted too soon.

I also make up conversations with people I know.

I pick my foot skin and pick my nose.

Pull little skin flakes from the back of my head. Disgusting, yes.

This too! I love a big sneeze. I really love it when I have a stinking cold and sneeze thick snot out. If it is yellow, even better.

The sneezing thing is actually the nice part of the covid test. Hahaha

That’s so fucking weird LOL!! I love it!!! 🤣🤣🤣

Sit in front of the glass oven door to watch bread/cake/yorkshires rise.

Burp loudly.

Reheat soup/casserole/stews in small casserole dishes to eat out of when ready (saves washing up).

Swig milk straight out the carton 🙈

Your singing of the time has really cheered me up today, thank you 🤣🤣

Omg I do this re washing, I got it from my mum. DH thinks I’m mad!
i also:
pick nose
fart
I like the feeling when I rub my inner arm against my boob! Feels nice & smooth it only do it when I’m not dressed ofc.