Things you do when no one is looking

[Novasmum]

Sometimes I think I’m strange or childish because I do these things when no one is around but surely people do things when no ones looking either 😂

Dance in the house
Make all sorts of expressions in the mirror
Lay on the floor after a long day
Put the bread knife back in the draw because bread is ‘clean’ 😳

your turn.

I imagine I'm presenting a TV food show. As I prepare my lunch, I talk about how to make the perfect cheese sandwich

Ah here goes….

picking the skin off feet

taking my clothes off at night and itching all of my body

boob holding

have hosted a number of cookery shows in my head whisky cooking, like a pp, I’ll have everything weighed out in ramekins

’sexy’ music videos in the shower

’sexy’ music videos whilst getting dressed

’sexy’ music videos waiting for my tan to dry

😂😂

and of course
pick nose
wipe the bread knife
farting

I eat my sunburn skin peelings

This is my favourite thread ever!

I learn tiktok dances. I feign disinterest when my dd shows them to me but as soon as she’s safely off to school…………

Lick butter off the knife.

Eat Nutella out of the jar with my fingers when I'm feeling particularly low (and whole hand if the jar is big enough).
Dip things into Nutella (biscuits, crisps, bread crusts).

Use tweezers to pull out snail trail hairs and pubes.

Put too much salt and vinegar on chips on purpose and use my finger to wipe the plate to lick the salty vinegary goodness off it.

Sniff my dogs feet, even though they smell bad.

Fart in the bath and smell it, even though it smells REALLY bad.

Look through other peoples bathroom cabinets because I'm a nosy bitch.

Omg I do this! Also lick my plate and pick my nose

Chew on my big toe nails after I've clipped them

Wank mostly once a day

Eat bowls of broccoli with thick bisto

Play Among Us

Oh and hoover up ants

Ok you’re officially the worst of the lot! 😂

Omg bath farts are the best/worst

Also do you mean you look through peoples bathroom cabinets when you’re alone in their house?!

When the kids have had the ball pit out I like to pretend I'm on a game show like the cube or (showing my age) the generation game and I have to race to see how quick I can put all the balls back in the bags 😆

Ok you’re officially the worst of the lot! 😂

Yay, I won! I just kind of assumed everyone did stuff like me. I think most of these are well tame 'lick the knife' 'pick my nose' 🤣

I reckon you're all much worse than you're saying.

I do so many of these, I rub clothes on my top lip to see if they are dry. Fart, pick my nose, have a good scratch, sleep with a childhood teddy still, I also have a day dream world I live in when ever I am trying to drop off, bored in the car etc.

Your honesty is appreciated! I do admit I am keeping my worst ones to myself!

Masturbate early morning, (evening one DH is allowed to sometimes join in) most mornings.

Eat the best roast potatoes before everyone gets to the table.

Look at other people post, never open it but have a nosy to see if I can see anything.

Sit with my hand cupping one boob with the odd nipple flick.

Take cash out of DH's wallet.

Masturbate early morning, (evening one DH is allowed to sometimes join in) most mornings.

Eat the best roast potatoes before everyone gets to the table.

Look at other people's post, never open it but have a nosy to see if I can see anything.

Sit with my hand cupping one boob with the odd nipple flick.

Take cash out of DH's wallet.

Flip the finger at my mil's back as she's walking away having said some nonsense.

Facebook stalk EVERYONE. But I'm not on Facebook.

I turn everything into a musical. The cast of my musical includes various inanimate objects, which have an array of incredible accents.

If I'm in the bed alone I wriggle my hips or feet as I go off to sleep.

Ha ha I thought I was the only one too to use a Bic pen lid as ear wax remover !

It's also useful to get hard to reach bogeys out.

I make sure several lids are around the house to have a satisfactory poke about when no one else is around.

I like trying to find little scabs on my scalp then eating them.

Plucking wiry moustache hairs.

Farting

Squeezing spots

Rolling bogeys

Does anyone else take great pleasure putting their finger down their arse cheek crack (but not quite as far as the anus) and seeing how much bum fluff there is by rolling between two fingers, then sniffing it?

Yep I do the same and it is especially satisfying to do when it's hot, the sweatier my arse is the more fluff that comes off 😂 I do the same with my belly button!

I always go up the stairs like this at home. No idea why

OMG I almost choked laughing. Absolutely hilarious

Talk to myself. A lot.
Sing as badly as I can. I'm am ok singer but I LOVE singing out of tune very loudly. Especially holding high notes for a long time.

Picking spots and plucking hairs.

I have full blown out loud conversations with people I’m due to meet what I’ll say and how I will respond to them

then when I meet them and they don’t react as I’ve thought I get pissed off

im weird