My partner proposed last April and we booked our wedding for August 2023. We thought that we'd be able to afford it because we are good savers and don't want an extravagant wedding. However, for the past few months it has really put a strain on our finances and well being.
We're thinking about post-phoning it (for at least a couple of years) as we're really not sure we can afford it right now, especially with the cost of living rising.
We have been feeling really stressed because all of our spare money goes to saving for the wedding and we're not able to do any fun things together. We feel like all we do is work.
There's no way we can afford to get married next year without taking out a loan/using credit cards. Even if we did manage to get married it would have to be on a small budget which isn't necessary the wedding we want. We've gone through every possibility, even eloping but isn't what either of us wants.
I would like to use some of our spare money we have each month to go on holiday as we have only ever been on one proper holiday together (we have been together for 6 years). We have had a little bit of a tough start in our relationship in terms of finances. We met while I was at university and he was on an apprenticeship. We had a small income and were renting in a city. We only managed to get out of our overdraft a couple of years ago and we were finally in a place where we were comfortable, which is why we though it was a good time to get married. We've just bought our first home which is a project because it's all we could afford. So we're in the process of renovating which adds to the stress and financial issues.
Recently we have started to struggle to put savings away because of the steep rise in the cost of living and we're beginning to worry about the fact we have very little left at the end of the month. I'm just not sure it's worth all the stress when our savings could go towards enjoying life and making memories together.
On the other hand, we have told everyone about the wedding and people seem really excited. We want to be married and start a family soon. We also have older grandparents who we want to be there on our wedding day.
I just wanted some advice, do you think it is reasonable for us to post-phone the wedding? Do you think it is embarrassing to tell people that the wedding is postponed? Is it silly to want to go on holiday over getting married?
I have spoken to my parents about this possibility and they fully understand and are supportive although disappointed. Whereas, my partners parents have made some comments that we are only saying this because we want them to give us money. 😩