Last time they broke the bed

[Hopenothinggoesbumpinthenight]

In a dilemma, married family couple (not saying too much because don’t want to get caught out and have nc) want to come and stay. Haven’t seen them since before pandemic but have ‘seen’ them on video calls.

Both were very obese last time we saw them and after they left I realised that our spare bed was broken, fortunately DH repaired it but he doesn’t think it will take their combined weight and we are very sure they’re a lot bigger than last time.

Just had a message asking to come and stay, how on earth do I word it politely that the bed will not take their weight.

Tell them the spare room is now an office with no bed.

Take the frane away and put the mattress on the floor?

Maybe just say the bed is no longer suitable for 2 adults as over the years the frame has taken a battering. Or could you not remove the frame and let them just have mattress, obviously telling them before hand. Or swap beds so they get your bed

'Really sorry but we're redecorating/whatever you can stage at the moment but the Premier Inn is nearby and we'd love to see you while you're in this neck of the woods. I can book dinner out?'

how on earth do I word it politely that the bed will not take their weight.

Well I don't think you can really! I know lots of people say that honesty is always the best policy but I really think in this particular scenario you'll have to make something up!

Is this the same as the op that used to write about her precious chairs and obese friends, several times..

You've turned the spare room into an office during lockdown and it needs to be kept locked because of confidential work stuff. (Stops them
Going in the room)

Don't put the mattress on the floor - they might struggle to get up again. If you can't reinforce the bed in some way then make up some excuse. Beds should take a considerable weight though with supports in the middle.

Just tell them that the spare bed is broken (you don't have. to say it was them) and that you have not got around/cannot afford/have ordered but it is not due to arrive soon new bed.

No not written on my about this before. Although I was worried about my bar stools last time.

I can’t see them being OK with a mattress on the floor and I’m definitely not giving mine up, we’ve already got an office so that’s out too. Decorating wouldn’t put them off either I reckon.

I think we might have to go on holiday!

You’ve ignored the suggestion of telling them the bed is broken!

I know, I’m a coward 🤣🤣🤣🤣

You don’t have to tell them they broke it! Just explain that it’s broken so isn’t able to be used any more. If you have children or any relatives or friends with children that visit, you could always say that the children bounced on it too hard and did for it that way.

I thought this would be juicer (broke having sex)! Yes my head is in the gutter 😂

But ya, I think tell the bed is broken. You don't have to tell them it was them. If you are thinking of replacing the broken bed maybe get one with a v solid base and not slats.

Just be honest and say the bed is broken. It’s not a lie; and you don’t need to embellish it, or tell them that they broke it. It’s just broken.

Honestly, it’ll be a million times easier than trying to put them off specific dates all the time, or making something up that everyone then has to remember.

The bed is broken so you can’t host overnights; but you’d love to see them for a day trip (if you would), or you’ll let them know when you get round to replacing it, or whatever.

How big are these people that they actually break furniture?

If it were me, I'd let them stay, if the bed breaks, they contribute to replacing it.

How exactly was it broken?

Can you say the room is now being used for a different purpose? Or have children you can blame for bouncing on it?! 😂😂

I wouldn't give any excuse that's date specific (like a holiday) or the reply will probably be something like "OK, how about a month later?" and you'll just have pushed the probelm on but not actually solved it

I think you have to tell them bed is broken I'm afraid

Kind honesty is required. Say you can't host them as the bed is broken but if they book into a hotel you would love to spend time with them X

Buy a divan, your bed is not fit for purpose - time to get a new one

If they can both fit in a standard double bed I can’t imagine they would be that obese tbh?

maybe just get a new bed that’s fit for purpose? Unless you don’t like said family member so don’t want them coming? Then I’d just politely make an excuse.

This is simple isn’t it? Sorry the spare bed is broken and we haven’t managed to replace it as of yet and not sure when we will. Then suggest premier inn/travelodge and say you’d love to see them?

do you buy very flimsy furniture? I’m obese but I’ve never broken anyones furniture 🤔

Say the bed is broken and spare room has no space as full of junk/stuff. If they visit fill it with boxes or something.