I was the recipient of unwanted advice from a random man today.

[Pollydonia]

..and actually remembered to say " thanks Random Man !" He just looked confused but another woman near by burst out laughing.
It was in the gym, I was doing my own thing , he tried to tell me to do it " his" way .
Seriously though, I'm 49 so I'm less likely to be intimidated by shit like this. I've also emailed the gym as a heads up .

How can one find the OP’s reply a “nasty over reaction” without hearing the tone?

I thought it sounded pretty lighthearted and humorous actually.

Are you ?

She reported the guy to the management. Not a lighthearted or humorous thing to do.

Yep

A piece of unsolicited advice (frequently incorrect anyway) from someone who is not an instructor, is merely a fellow participant=annoying and reduces my enjoyment in the activity,

ARGh I hate that! In my ballet class I've had to shut down one woman trying to "coach" me and now she tries to show others what to do. Thing is, she's a terrible dancer and "coaches" wrongly. I had to correct her once when she was showing a newbie how to do a fairly basic but not beginner's step (faillé assemblé) and showing it wrongly. Dagger looks from her but I was right, as the teacher said when said bossy woman appealed to the teacher.

@Intrigueddotcom I’m having trouble following what you mean in your posts. OP would have still started a thread if what?

Not sure what you are referencing with “I disagree with the tone used.” Did the posted I tagged write that somewhere?

I reported what happened as per policy.
Why does me following gym policy annoy some posters so much. Or me having a voice and using it ?
Internalized misogyny perhaps ?

Not you! I was quoting @camaleon

Chameleon called her frightened and her reaction “nasty”.

@Johnnysgirl

The purpose of the gym policy requesting issues like this be reported is to stop people like this man from running off their members.

It’s a massive problem in many gyms and I find it terrific that any gym tries to prevent it. A male friend of mine stopped going to our gym because of constant annoying comments from a man at the gym. (A constant gym presence who enjoyed making other men gay and straight uncomfortable.) My personal trainer who worked at the gym dealt with it constantly also from many many men.

Again... I DO NOT QUESTION that the man was patronising or inappropriate. YOu obviously did not want his advice. You told him so. I see nothing else to it. I would never report this to anyone else. I do not report people to others if I can deal with a situation myself.

I find your answer to him unnecessarily aggressive (I repeat, I think the world would be much better if we were all less prone to verbal and physical violence as men are) and no need to report to gym

You disagree. No need to tell me how to handle my own participation here. We all have enough neurons to know we don't need to read posts in here

English is not my first language so I would be more than prepared to have used the word wrongly.
However, 'tone' can apply to a piece of writing or a situation. Does not need to be 'heard'

camaleon "I find your answer to him unnecessarily aggressive (I repeat, I think the world would be much better if we were all less prone to verbal and physical violence as men are) and no need to report to gym"

1. OP was not aggressive

2. gym have asked for reports of this behaviour, as they recognise it as a problem.

@camaleon

I find your answer to him unnecessarily aggressive

Where on earth was OP 'unnecessarily aggressive'?

The gym has ASKED people to do this.

This has been repeated many, many, many times on this thread.

What part of it are you struggling with?

I love all the people screeching, ‘massive over-reaction!!!!’

What a massive over-reaction to someone saying ‘thanks random guy’, and reporting it to the gym - just as the gym requested.

Telling random blokes to be quiet really, REALLY annoys some people, doesn’t it?

Quite funny to witness.

Well done OP!

I've had many a Random Man offer me his wisdom free of charge.

A Random Man who was oddly angry that I had a large breed dog, he stopped me on the street to tell me the dog was too big for me and would overpower me. He shook his head angrily and said "you don't know what you've done" as if I had unleashed the hounds of hell 🤷🏻‍♀️

Another Random Man at a petrol station, watched me get out my big car and whistled and said "is that big enough for you"

I ignored both but will be saying Thank You, Random Man in future

Could the man generally not trying to help OP
OP could have been lifting the wrong way , stretching the wrong way and only wanted to prevent injury
Just a thought

I had a disgusting man experience today, some of you would say I'm imagining it, but I'm not. Walking dog in the park - guy is on a bench & looking at me. I pay no attention. I walk past the bench with dog, do not look at him & as I pass, he starts snorting up phlegm. I walk past, revolted. Half an hour later, other side of large park - same guy passes me & does the same thing. This time I say 'gross' loud enough to hear him. What a pig.

That does sound disgusting, Why would anyone tell you you're imagining it?

First of all, she did not ask for his "help." Secondly, he came into her personal space, and the idiot told her to use more weight than she was. The op is restricted due to certain medical conditions she has, not that Random Man would care. He just wants to boss around a woman at the gym like some kind of Neanderthal.

Stop being an apologist for misogynists. Just a thought.

Good for them. There are women who give up going to gyms because of shit like this. Unwanted “advice”, comments, “compliments”, staring.
I’m reeling at all the replies making excuses for him.

‘Just a thought’ that’s been tediously uttered several times on this thread. But thanks for your searing insights.

I mean, he must be right, and she (the OP) must be wrong, right?

@KitBumbleB
I wrote about my near identical random man dog expert earlier. Because I am 5 ft nothing he assumed I wouldn't be able to control a rottweiler. Now, setting aside the fact that the roti in question is in fact a cavalier spanial crossed with maybe a dachshund, maybe a chihuahua, can just about reach my knee when he stands on his back legs and was full grown at the time of his random intervention, human size is not important to dog ownership if the dog is trained correctly. Which all my dogs are. Random man felt he had to let me know that in his opinion, I wasn't suitable to own a manly dog and had to impart his knowledge to me, even though I hadn't even looked in his direction. The look of sheer annoyance on his face was amazing when told that's a full grown dog and his mother whelped in the shelter so they knew half his breed. He still contended, he was right, the shelter was wrong and was affronted that I wouldn't back down and agree with him.

There are so many people suggesting the OP should just have said, "Thanks."

But why should she?

Unsolicited advice doesn't warrant a thank you.

I've had men offer to help me with something. If I need help, I'll accept it with thanks. If I don't need it, I'll reject it with thanks. But unsolicited advice or opinion? I don't feel the need to thank someone for that.