Worst wedding you've been to?

[Clawdy]

My worst wedding memory was when DH's cousin got married. He was reluctant to go, and said it might get rough....It did, rather! Drunk old Uncle Wilf fell down the steps and broke his leg, and the bridegroom had to be restrained from attacking his new MIL with a bottle of wine! DH's mum chided his brother for not going, saying "You missed a lovely wedding! "

www.frenchtoday.com/blog/french-culture/expect-typical-french-wedding/

What details were they discussing for 1hr 1/2 ?

Went to a wedding around four hours away and an hour from where we were staying, ceremony was at 11am, wedding breakfast at 12, all done and dusted by 3 and then had to wait around the venue for the evening reception to start four hours later, guests staying went off to their rooms and there was no where else for us to go.

Another one, bride and groom went off for ages with most of the wedding party to have pictures done, and us and a handful of others were left in the bar. The wedding breakfast had no background music and it was very quiet, there were a few empty tables from no shows and the FOG heckled his son during the speeches. It all just felt very awkward.

🤣🤣🤣
Ditto! Add to mine and I started vomiting just before my vows and didn’t stop.

Shitty husband. Shitty Norovirus.
One of them’s in prison now.

Oh I love this thread 😬 I think the problem with almost all weddings (and the reason I want to have a very brief, informal one) is that the event itself becomes so built up over all this time, the bride quite often views herself as the queen by the time the day actually comes around. They are so far into their ‘perfect day’ idea that they have no concept of whether anyone is actually enjoying themselves or not. It just makes me cringe a lot of the time 🙈 It feels like everyone (me included) is trying to put on an act like they care every time they pass them, when really they’ll go home and not think about that person’s relationship ever again.

I was at a wedding recently where the best man’s speech annoyed the bride so much she was hitting him under the table and telling him to stop. He basically said he didn’t like her then tried to turn it into a joke but you could cut the atmosphere with a knife by that point 😬 I’ve also been to one where sadly the bride had MS, because of this she needed a lie down during the day, this was all planned. The wedding started very early on and we didn’t know anyone else there. We were sitting in the sort of hotel waiting area between the ceremony and meal for 7 hours with literally nothing happening, not even any background music playing 😕 to me it just isn’t a fun day out!

My cousin’s first wedding. He was supposed to marry his long term girlfriend, but called it off two weeks beforehand and married someone else a month later. My uncle got drunk, fell onto the buffet and smashed the table. We couldn’t get a taxi home and ended up walking home to my Nan’s, about 5 miles through the roughest bits of north London in the small hours. We left my Grandad at the reception venue as he was too drunk to move.

Two years later, same cousin’s second wedding. They only had an afternoon reception, so my uncle invited everyone back to theirs in the evening. The bride’s parents were very posh. Her Mum refused to sit down and said she’d never been in a council house before. My Mum got very drunk and vomited profusely in the car, covering herself, me and my Nan with sick. My Dad was out washing the car for a good hour when we got back and it still stank of sick the next day.

I don’t think we went to his third wedding!

A very expensive wedding, in DH’s family, the v rich grooms second marriage to a MUCH younger lady (30 years younger). She got absolutely hammered, and went to make her own speech - she grabbed the mic and said ‘I know what you’re all thinking, that I’m with him for the money, but actually it’s cos he’s an amazing shag” 😳 later on she vomited down her own dress and went home before the night do started. Then a bridesmaid was caught in the disabled toilet shagging the fiancé of another bridesmaid. Boy did it kick off.

actually it’s probably one of the better weddings I’ve been to 😂

They’re divorced now. Quelle surprise.

But the betrayed bridesmaid forgave her friend AND fiancé for the shagging. They got hitched, with the cheating bridesmaid as bridesmaid again, and have 2 kids now. I had my NCT classes with her, she used to bang on about how amazing her DH was, I felt sorry for her

I have never been happier that everyone I know is already older than me and already married or just happy living together unmarried.

A cousins wedding where she married into a family of cf and all the family only attended to support my uncle. My uncle (FOB) was conned out to pay for their honeymoon as well as paying for an expensive wedding where my cousins mil took control of the whole event by adding extra guests, requesting a cultural band, making sure the extra guests were also provided with hotel rooms and picked up from the airport and requesting all sorts because her son was such a catch except he was a cocklodger living in my uncles spare apartment without a job throughout the duration of their 2 year marriage and not contributing and literally leeching off my uncle. My cousin she's a cf as well actually expecting all of this from her father.

Back to the wedding, the mil and grooms cf demands all added up and on the day of the wedding, the atmosphere was literally like cold as ice. My uncle warned my cousin that she's marrying into a cf family and was literally awaiting for any signal to be made by her thick daughter so he could cancel the whole nightmare. Nope she married the cf and got divorced 2 years later. The brides family never got up to dance, never got involved with any photographs, just sat there waiting for any signal so a massive brawl can happen to help it end it there and then.

Towards the end of the wedding, I went out for a cig with my glass of wine and I saw the mil and FIL carrying crates of food and booze to their cars which I never told anyone although my uncle found out when he was billed with the extras. The groom never paid back the honeymoon either and a whole lot of other stuff happened during their 2 short years of marriage which can be a story actually. The cf groom now asks for petrol money to see his own daughter still with no intention of working in his 30s living his cf mum.

I haven't been to many weddings, they don't seem popular in my circle . But! The last one was a second marriage and so all the couples friends had young children, so despite the free bar everyone left by 9pm.

I've also been to a wedding where the photos took hours and we were very bored. And the evening entertainment was a woman who couldn't sing a note. Our DD was very young, and again we left by 9pm.

I've been invited via a friend of DH to go to a wedding in Eastern Europe this year but already have been warned about Orthodox ceremonies and the party after. I might not go.

Some shocking behaviour

I think I must’ve been at that same wedding! Or else it’s a common vicar speech. Was it in the Cotswolds?

I went to a wedding in a football stadium.
During the reception the clubs mascot (don’t want to say which mascot as it could be outing) but think guy in large animal costume, came
onto the dance floor and had pictures with everyone.

I hate football (I’m pretty sure the bride did too) so just stood awkwardly at the buffet while all the men ran round the mascot like children.

A tent in a field in the POURING rain. It was freezing and muddy. I was also a plus one and didn’t really know anyone. And I’m vegetarian and there were no veggie options (hog roast). It was about 15/20 years ago, when no veggie option wasn’t unusual, but still! I think I had some bread and butter though - better than nothing I suppose!

I just remember feeling cold, muddy (heels sinking), hungry and slightly bored…

I ditched the guy who brought me immediately after. Not his fault the wedding wasn’t fun for a plus one who didn’t know anyone, but I remember thinking if we were really into each other, we’d be able to have fun there together. But we didn’t.

Back in the early 80s my brother married a Catholic, our family roots were CoE and furthermore my parents, my brothers and I were not religious. But SIL's family were Catholic church goers, and they refused to speak to our side of the family at the Catholic wedding, and SIL's father refused to walk her down the aisle. The wedding photos, top table etc was all so awkward. They have been married for over 40 years and SIL's family dont talk to us.

My lovely friend's wedding many years ago, it wasnt her fault, however she got married in Australia, and it was a blooming hot Australian's summer afternoon (it was something like 30C & high humidity). We are not Australian so was not use to that weather, my 7yo DD was flowergirl, thankfully she got through the service fine but then she nearly fainted in the photos because of the heat, friend was lovely though and wrapped up the photos fairly quickly.

My own, biggest mistake I ever made. I knew I didn't love him but didn't have the balls to call it off, I was on autopilot, to this day I can't remember anything about the ceremony. I got extremely drunk at the reception because I knew it was the wrong decision. We were married for nearly 8 sodding years, I could have committed murder & been out quicker.

Could summarise most of these with not enough food, too much to drink and too much hanging around.
I'm thinking of DH 's cousin's wedding where her father made a speech that revealed he had never noticed her (youngest of 4) or thought much about her before.
Another of DH's cousins where the wedding was in a very posh yacht club. Almost no food at all. At hourly intervals a waiter would emerge from the kitchen with 1 tray of canapes. Eventually most of the guests were gathered by the kitchen door, desperate to grab something, anything to eat.

No proper horrible ones, but just one that had a bunch of minor annoyances: lots of time waiting around, nowhere convenient/comfortable to wait, no food/snacks while waiting. It just made the whole day feel a bit rubbish.

My friend- the ceremony was lovely, in a quaint country church, reception at their home in a rambling cottage.
I visited the bathroom only to catch the groom shagging one of the bridesmaids up against the wall.

No he never believed she hasn't said it. He's still single now and his daughter is grown up. Still rules the roost by all accounts

Nothing compared to a shooting.

Close friend's mother was getting married, she picked a couple of days before Xmas so it was cold and several hours drive for half the guests.

Friend and I would normally stay at their house but booked into the venue which was a niceish hotel.

With a load of stairs to the front door, I'm disabled and found the 'access' was the goods lift. Please if you are planning a wedding and have disabled or elderly guests don't take the venue's word that they are 'fully accessible', check what the access actually is.

The day before the wedding the venue called and said they had double booked but offered another room, obviously everywhere is booked up in the week before Xmas.

So wedding ceremony was fine but when we got to the venue the mulled witn on arrival was missing and the bride was getting upset so I went to find the manager, I asked at the bar for the manager and the bloke next to me ordered a drink, "On the wedding tab" I told the bar staff not to serve him because the tab was for after the food and speeches. He tried to argue, I asked him to name either the bride or the groom. He had no idea.

OK things started to happen, mulled wine arrives and then we go to the 'function room' which had an Xmas party at one end.

The meal was 'afternoon tea' but they served the cake first so we thought it was maybe a cake and coffee type thing, but then they brought out sandwiches.

The day after the wedding we went to pay the bill, were both students so not loaded so we were each paying for one night, but my friend's bill was £50 more than mine, I queried it and they said "Oh it's for the meal you had yesterday", er no we were at a wedding, we had wedding food here and then the evening bash was at the b and G's house.

So we had to argue about not paying for a meal we didn't have.

So we got to the b and g's house to do the clear up, they had gone off on honeymoon.

The bride had had a chocolate fountain with fruit and there was loads of fruit left over so I thought I'd bottle them in sugar syrup, I made a big mistake, I bought jars from Tesco which look like kilner jars but are not.

I didn't know this, I thought it would be a nice surprise when they got back, I'd previously made similar things and they had been well received.

Apparently two weeks later the b and g came home to fermented fruit bubbling all over the kitchen counter.

I’ve been to many incredibly tedious hotel-a-kit weddings but they weren’t awful just tedious.

Most weddings in my family end up with at least one physical fight and a lot of drunken fallouts. Thank god my cousins kids have stopped getting married mostly.

The worst must have been when I was a kid though in the mid 80s back when everyone took the present to the reception and people were still setting up home as they married so needed toasters etc. They’d all been loaded in to the grooms car; the couple were staying over in the hotel ( function room in a pub with a couple of bedrooms really, long before the type of hotel do now) when someone popping outside noticed the boot had been forced open and someone had stolen the lot. The poor couple were inconsolable.

No really terrible ones. Before we got married though we went to a few weddings and there were some negatives that I was not keen to repeat at ours.

• Wedding where DH was best man, we hadn't been going out long and I only knew him there and no-one else. It was a lovely wedding, but we hardly got any time together all weekend- there was something to do for the wedding Friday night, Saturday morning, and then finally a few hours later the ceremony, reception, where we were separated for hours- so much so that I was on the "singles" table. Then the couple got the wedding party back together for Sunday brunch. Then in the afternoon, finally a long drive back to London from Somerset stuck in traffic all the way which of course took fucking ages (all the rest of the wedding party were local) Then straight back to work Monday, absolutely knackered. It made me be far less demanding of our guests/wedding party, especially those with long journeys to get there, and not want to take up their entire weekend with wedding business.

• One where a big group of us attended for the evening only. Not bad in theory, it was closer than the other wedding, but still meant an overnight stay. As the wedding was so rural and there was no other option, we all stayed in the venue where the wedding breakfast and then reception was being held. Of course, you arrive in the afternoon to check in. So immediately everyone is aware of the two tiers of guests as the all-day guests are arriving for the wedding breakfast as we queue to check in - just a bit naff really.

• Then at the allotted hour the second stream we were finally deemed to be allowed to join the other guests, of course there was a huge queue for the bar as a whole bunch of people just arrived. Then the beige food buffet very quickly ran out as the all day guests piled in first. None of the evening guests had had dinner, as the only option was the hotel and no evening meals were available because there was a wedding on. After much disgruntlement among guests, one of the wedding party persuaded the hotel to make more food, and several trays of limp sandwiches appeared, which guests fell upon like hungry crows. Then there was an England match on and a big screen in the main bar, so we all went to watch it after the first dance, instead of listening to a crap band.

• Also went to another one where there was a gap after the ceremony while the bride and groom went to have photos taken and the guests were shoved into a room with not enough seats and no drinks or food. There was almost a mutiny until someone persuaded the venue to open the bar and get more seats out.

• One in London that was child-free, ok, we had DD1 by then and it was nice to have a break. But there was no dancing and a standing only venue for the reception. It was just so boring, and we all went to sit on walls outside.

• At our own we were determined to look after our guests, not make huge demands of their time, not make anyone feel second stream, always provide enough food and drink and spaces to sit and the opportunity to have a dance to a good disco, and I checked very carefully that there were no big football matches which clashed.