Struggling to save 3-6 months salary - how did you do it?

[Lovinglife45]

I initially posted in Money Matters but thought I would get more responses in chat.

Despite having a decent household income (not high earners though), we have never been able to save 3 to 6 months salary. We save every month and transfer on pay day, however we dip into it to top up petrol and buy a food shop near pay day. We also help both parents who are struggling financially.

We have a monthly personal allowance of £120 each which covers clothes, socialising, hair and beauty. Not nearly enough!

I polish my own nails, dye my own hair, buy shaving kits, pluck my own eyebrows. I do not buy newspapers/magazines, food or drink on the go lunch at work. I rarely spend more than £30 on a pair of shoes or item of clothing. I buy non-leather shoes and only shop in sales.

Our dc attend one extra curriculum activity each.

We are constantly buying dc new clothes, shoes as they have growth spurts.

I use an Excel budget sheet and update monthly.

I stay awake most nights worrying about our lack of savings. I am also on anti-depressants for increased anxiety.

How long did it take you to save 3 to 6 months and how do you leave the savings untouched?

If you give your parents £150 to £300 a month, that’s your answer to how you can save 3-6 months salary. That’s a lot of money.

PP advice if save less but put it somewhere it can’t be touched is a very good one and one we eventually Cottoned on to

Also try You Need a Budget, the budgeting app is great but their online webinars are even better, j learnt so much from them

How often are you spending £50 on a birthday present and meal out that you can’t afford, though?

If you stopped giving your parents money and cut your personal spends to £100 or bought your DC less clothes you’d have over 3k saved in a year.
Could you sell anything, such as old DC’s clothes and use the money towards their new stuff? Or the same with your own clothes, or just mix and match what you have for six months and don’t buy anything?

Stop funding your parents but also stop pressurising yourself to save so much. Advice above of 3 months bills is a great idea. Then whe you're achieved that, you can aim to have 6 months bills. Then return to your 3 months income aim and see how you are doing.

If the expectation to help your parents is cultural, would they, or your wider families help you out, if you needed it?

If so, you might have less need for a decent emergency fund, because some in the family would always make sure you were helped in your time if need.

On the matter of the £120 pm spending money, I can see how that isn't enough, that would get used up on a coffee and a supermarket meal deal when you were at work and many people consider that to be a basic essential, and that's before you get to things like hair and beauty, work collections etc.

I’ve just done a search, and saw that you piss away almost £30 a month on makeup!!!

Stop and think about that. A full QUARTER of your monthly spends.

Could you reduce the £120 to £100 and see how you go? That wouldn't be a dramatic reduction so shouldn't feel like too big an impact on you. Then if you get on with that, can reduce a bit more see how you do.

Again with the parents, if they are short £185 then don't round up to £200 or £190 Even if it feels tight. Maybe even send £180 and ask them to find a few quid themselves. They are fortunate you are helping them which you really don't have to, so if that needs to be a more minimal amount for a while then do that.

I wouldn't worry too much about it being exactly 3-6 months, any amount of savings is a good start. Make sure it's in the best savings account, one you can't get to easily and is accumulating maximum interest.

childrengrowing
I know. Parents survive on state pension and struggle to buy food and put heating on.

coco
Once a month

Barbara
No, we cannot rely on any family members to help out if we were in need.

Relentless
We do need to reign in the amount we give.

You can’t do all of:

• save
• support your parents
• spend £50 a month on other people’s birthdays
• spend £30 a month on makeup

You need to choose.

@Lovinglife45

childrengrowing I know. Parents survive on state pension and struggle to buy food and put heating on.

coco
Once a month

Barbara
No, we cannot rely on any family members to help out if we were in need.

Relentless
We do need to reign in the amount we give.

If your parents rent and only have the state pension are they sure they are claiming everything that they can?

Yes it’s good to have savings but it’s not worth giving yourself anxiety over. Whatever you have in savings is helpful. So be proud of what you have achieved and keep chipping in cash. It will build up.

Definitely find out if your parents are claiming all the benefits they are entitled to, there may be top ups they can get. Also look at the property they are renting, are there cheaper to run places? If more than a 3rd of your disposal income is going on your parents, then this is the obvious place to see if there's anything else that can be done to help them.

I use chip. It takes random amounts out that I don’t notice, and have it set to take the maximum amount using it’s magic algorithm. Quick to withdraw from if I need it, but painless easy saving that I really don’t notice disappearing from my bank accounts and it racks up quickly.

Yes it’s good to have savings but it’s not worth giving yourself anxiety over

I think I meant don’t focus on a large goal that gives you anxiety. Set an attainable one that’s a little bit stretching ie to not dip in to savings by more than £100 this month, £75 next etc.

Assuming your parents are living frugally and you want to keep helping them, are either able to find a job to supplement their pension?
You do need to have a discussion about how you are feeling the pinch.
A certain amount of saving is necessary expenditure.

OP do your parents claim pension credit, housing benefit etc?

Finding and needle

Yes, they claim all relevant benefits.

Do you sell the kids old clothes and toys once they've outgrown them?

Look at both your own & your parents utilities and monthly outgoings and see where you can save money by swapping to cheaper deals. If you manage to make savings for your parents then they'll rely on you less financially.

Stop funding your parents, don't give to work gift collections. In future if it's a friend's birthday buy them something cheap or just give a card and suggest a coffee out rather than a meal.

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/money-legal/benefits-entitlements/pension-credit/

Your parents might be eligible for pension credit.

I agree with everyone else,you can't afford to subsidise your parents. Also is that correct that you spend £30 @ month on make up? That sounds like an awful lot. And the meals out for birthdays isn't necessary. Your friends will understand if you can't afford it, and I would think that the way things are going now your friends won't be able to afford it either.

Sell everything you no longer need in your house.

£30 x 12 months = £360 a year on make up. This amount is better invested in a stocks and shares ISA or premium bonds.

I save £25 monthly in a premium bonds account and I've saved a few thousand over a few years. Any extra cash I get is invested in pb as well, no effort at all. You need to switch your mind set.

I agree with most on here £30 a month on make up us a lot of makeup. I wouldn't dream of spending that every month and we have a lot of disposable income.

Spend more on shoes! Save up for them. £30 ones won't last. The last pair I bought cost £200, but that was in 2018, and I still wear and love them loads.