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Original poster

Daughter paying for laundry

110 replies

Starbonnet123 · 25/03/2022 10:35

My daughter is 19 and still lives with us at home and will do for quite a while I think . She doesn't pay rent as we don't need the money and we'd rather she saved as she does want to buy a house . She works and gets well paid for her age .
The question is what should I charge her to do her laundry? She wants me to do it as she "hasn't got time" and doesn't want the hassle and i won't do it for her as it's taking up my time , I work full time , and me doing it brings me no benefit whatsoever so my husband thinks I should charge her to do it if I want to .
What do mumsnet think is the going rate for laundry ?

OP posts:

Frenchfancy · 25/03/2022 12:58

I do my own laundry and that is all. Everyone does their own once they reach the age of 10.

It annoys me when people say it's just putting it in a machine. That is the easy bit. It it taking it out of the machine, hanging it to dry, folding it and putting it away that I object to.

ididntevennotice · 25/03/2022 13:00

It’s weird for you, normal for others.

And I am allowed to say so.

Personally I gave mine laundry privacy at the same time I gave them locks on their doors.

Locks on their doors

They don’t always want mum treating their stains and they need to learn how to operate a washing machine.

Can you read? DD20 does operate the washing machine.

Stains? What the hell? We haven't really had any issues here. What kind of stains are you taking about? The worst stains I have had to 'treat' have been ketchup

DelphiniumBlue · 25/03/2022 13:03

Her laundry is her problem.
I have 2 sons who manage their own laundry, they have lived away from home and it's not an issue for them. I will sometimes do laundry for the one who has returned home but it is as a favour, and usually in return for him doing something for me.
DS 3 is 21 and should do his own laundry and it is really hard to watch him not do it for weeks on end. Sometimes I cave. But no one sees it as my job, he doesn't expect me to do it.
Let your daughter have the opportunity to have her own adult responsibilities without you babying her. You both work, don't make it your problem.

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eatentoomanygrapes · 25/03/2022 13:07

I can't understand how anyone thinks laundry takes longer than five minutes?

Carry it downstairs. Put in washing machine.
3 hours later, take it out of washing machine and hang it out.

Job done, maximum 10 mins of effort. She needs to just do her own laundry!

PandemicAtTheDisco · 25/03/2022 13:08

Do you have adult sons and find time to do their laundry? That would be the only explaination for why your daughter should feel you should do her laundry.

Enko · 25/03/2022 13:11

She is a grown up so does her own laundry

SpicePumpkin · 25/03/2022 13:12

She can find time like most other adults have to! You are not her employee. Don't get into that kind of relationship with your child.

Kite22 · 25/03/2022 13:14

I do my adult dcs' laundry, as it all goes in together / faster turn round for things / can sometimes split into hotter / muckier washes / or delicates, etc / means no-one is setting off loads that aren't full.
Better for the environment, better for our bills, no skin off my nose.
However they all quite like cooking, so I rarely cook, as they enjoy it.

I've never understood people doing their washing individually in a family, but, whatever works for you. the point is, everyone should be pulling their weight.

bumblingbovine49 · 25/03/2022 13:14

I absolutely loathe most household tasks but laundry is the easiest and least time consuming in my opinion. I often don't have time for household tasks but clothes washing and drying doesn't really take much time each day ( maybe 10-15 mins a day either hanging stuff up, folding or putting away etc ). I pretty much do some bits of laundry every day but it sort of gets done in between things so doesn't feel that much hassle . I don't iron though !

maddiemookins16mum · 25/03/2022 13:17

And this is why not charging her keep has not helped. She wants everything done for her.

maddiemookins16mum · 25/03/2022 13:18

@eatentoomanygrapes

I can't understand how anyone thinks laundry takes longer than five minutes?

Carry it downstairs. Put in washing machine.
3 hours later, take it out of washing machine and hang it out.

Job done, maximum 10 mins of effort. She needs to just do her own laundry!

3 hours!

mindutopia · 25/03/2022 13:25

Definitely time for her to figure out how to do washing. I was doing my own from about the age of 10. Unless she is working 2 full-time jobs while raising 3 kids as a single parent, I'm sure she can find an hour a week to do the washing.

Ragwort · 25/03/2022 13:31

I bet she has time for a social life?

Unless she is an Intensive care doctor or nurse, working 24/7 I just don't believe the "haven't got time" argument?

TopTabby · 25/03/2022 13:32

Completely agree that older teens & young adults should be capable of doing their own laundry.
But 10 year olds? Seems harsh although I'm sure you've got your own good reasons...

Chloemol · 25/03/2022 13:35

Iwould be saying I don’t have the time either and leave it for her to sort

tara66 · 25/03/2022 13:35

No washing machine available?

Runnerduck34 · 25/03/2022 14:35

I wouldn't charge for laundry , I have 4 DC in teens/ early twenties. If its in the laundry basket I just put it in the machine along with everyone elses.
Slightly bizarre to charge for laundry imo.
If you want to charge make it a peppercorn rent as a contribution towards food and bills , and if you don't want to do get laundry get her to do it herself.

2bazookas · 25/03/2022 14:54

Just don't do her laundry.

Cleothecat75 · 25/03/2022 15:10

Does she do anything round the house (cooking/hoovering/clean the bathroom)? If she makes tea most nights for the family, it’s a fair swap that she gets her washing done. If she does nothing To support the running of the home, she needs to step up and do her own laundry.
If there are 3 of you living in the house and you all work similar hours, you should be doing a third of the tasks each (especially as she is living rent free).

Everyone is busy, but the laundry (and other equally dull tasks) still need to be done.

anotherbloodyyearofcovid · 25/03/2022 15:23

Why are you even considering doing her laundry? She can do her own or wear dirty clothes. Daughter needs to learn time management skills if she 'hasn't got time', good grief!

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 25/03/2022 15:34

She needs to pay rent and do her own laundry.

"Doesn't want the hassle" - cheeky madam!

LuckySantangelo35 · 25/03/2022 15:36

When her clothes are stinking she’ll find the time to wash them im sure.

Her time isn’t more important than yours OP.

Leave her to it. She’s an adult.

Honestly you’ll get some martyrs on here who will say you should wash your offsprings clothes for ever because they are your CHILDREN and as a mother you should be grateful and happy to do it and YOU BROUGHT THEM INTO THIS WORLD!!

bestbefore · 25/03/2022 15:36

My DD at uni complains it's £5 a load at the uni machines with a dry so if you did charge def at least £5

Lulu1919 · 25/03/2022 15:40

Didn't charge mine
Just went in with our stuff
Did her own ironing if she wanted anything ironed
Didn't charge rent but she would treat us to coffee n cake now and then and would cook a few meals a month ..she wasn't well paid as she was doing volunteer work for 6 months after Uni before starting a PGCE .

Jjjayfee · 25/03/2022 15:42

Just don't do it. How ridiculous that she expects you to do it

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