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Could you date someone with such a limited diet?

134 replies

georgousbold · 17/03/2022 18:55

I've met a really nice man recently.

6 weeks in and I'm really enjoying his company. I have a disabled son so finding anyone new was always going to be hit and miss

He's a really friendly and caring person, it seems. I have absolutely no support most of the time for my son and last week he even offered to step in when I had a vomiting bug, offering to take DS to the local park and go for a walk with him so I could catch some extra zzzs. He made it clear that he knew why I'd decline as he was new, but said the offer was there and open (he's a doctor so very much DBS checked)

We have been out for something to eat 3 times now. Each time, chicken nuggets and chips, with a little ketchup on the side and sprinkled with vinegar and lots of salt like it's snowing on his plate Blush

Yesterday we had a lunch at a local cafe. Chicken nuggets and chips, with lots and lots of salt, then he asked for some beans so a slight improvement.

Could you go out with someone with such a limited diet? I asked why it was so simple and he shrugged and said 'it's predictable'

He has asked to take me to a sushi place next week so we shall see how this plays out. I don't think they sell nuggets!

OP posts:
roastedsaltedpeanut · 17/03/2022 20:35

*partner. Not parent! Sorry!
To be fair I did inherit this food obsession from my parents and it plays such a central role in our social lives.

Ragwort · 17/03/2022 20:35

I don't think I would be that bothered now, at my age Grin. My DH can be a bit of a 'foodie' and it can be a bit tedious and equally as dull as someone only wanting to eat chicken nuggets. So long as the other person doesn't try and dictate what you eat then so what? Much easier to shove a few chicken nuggets in the oven and then cook something for yourself rather then tediously trying to compromise on a menu that suits you both every night.

DurhamDurham · 17/03/2022 20:36

It would put me off, it's all very well saying it's no big deal in the grand scheme of things but going out for a meal is a great joy of mine so I'd hate being that restricted. Most of the restaurants and cafes I'd want to go to don't sell chicken nuggets and chips so it would be a struggle.

Also I know you've answered the bit about him definitely being a doctor and why he offered to take your child out for a walk but I think six weeks in that's still a really weird/ inappropriate thing to do.

Ragwort · 17/03/2022 20:38

roasted do you honestly want to discuss the cultural background to a menu every night ? Hmm I used to love cooking and went to culinary school, worked in catering etc etc but after 35 years of marriage and of cooking & eating dinner together every night the whole subject bores me senseless Grin.

saraclara · 17/03/2022 20:39

I don't really understand why what he eats affects you.

@Frostylaudanum several posters have described how it might, or how it's affected them having a partner with such limited acceptable foods.
If it would prevent them socialising as a couple/accepting invitations to people's homes for dinner/make it hard for the other person to enjoy eating out at varied places, then of course it could affect OP.

Repetitivebeats · 17/03/2022 20:40

@Mrsbunton

As a side issue the fact that he’s a doctor and has passed a dbs check doesn’t mean he’s safe to be alone with your son. The fact that he’s offering to take a child out alone that he hardly knows would worry me far more than what his diet is like.
Agreed. You've only been with this guy 6 weeks and not only has he already met your child, he's already trying to take him out on his own?!
Nomoresmoresthensnores · 17/03/2022 20:43

If food is a big thing for YOU then yes you are incompatible.

And yes its not good him offering to take your son out. Might have been innocent but you really need to be on your guard. Unfortunately it is well known paedophiles target single mums (your child is also vulnerable)
If it was innocent then yes he does seem generally clueless about acceptable protocol
Some of the things you say point to ND. But obviously not of course definite.
You may also find he's quite rigid about other things. So really it's for you to decide if you're compatible overall. It's not just about nuggets.

Redglitter · 17/03/2022 20:43

I think at this stage it's unfair to say he eats a restricted diet. He's chosen the same thing from different places. If he likes it & its on the menu why not choose it. I've been out 3 times recently. On.2 occasions I had macaroni. It's not because I'm fussy, it's just something I really like.

I think the fact he's going for sushi.would suggest he's not too restricted. Give him.a chance, suggest other types of restaurants & see what he says

If he was a nice guy and we got on.well I wouldn't be put off

godmum56 · 17/03/2022 20:44

@A580Hojas
"Because if you are dating such a person then you are very limited in where you can go out to eat. What if you fancy a curry or a Thai meal or just some proper grown up food?

If you are living with them it's even worse unless you choose to do entirely separate meals - which is a pita, double the washing up, double the shopping etc.

I'd have thought it's completely obvious why it's no fun to be in a relationship with someone with a severely restricted diet. I don't for a minute believe the people on this thread who say they wouldn't be bothered by it."

so now we are liars? thanks for that

Fairylightsongs · 17/03/2022 20:44

If he’s booked a sushi restaurant he doesn’t jist eat this and if you’re in the sort of place that serves chicken nugget and chips then you’ve not been going for dinner, so I suspect you’re being judgmental and actually don’t know what he eats. No one who only eats this would book a sushi restaurant

godmum56 · 17/03/2022 20:45

@roastedsaltedpeanut

Food is such a crucial part of my life and I wouldn’t be able to stand anyone with such limited palate. Food is like a snapshot of a culture. Ideally i would like my parents to be able to discuss the culinary technique as well as historical/cultural backgrounds of a famous dish. Whats the most authentic recipe and where to find it etc. Cannot be with someone who isn’t able to step away from toddler food, who potentially carries the genes of not being able to have fun with food. I despair at the thought of a husband and children who can only eat toddler food for the rest of their lives!
holy moses, you sound like a bundle of fun
WonderfulYou · 17/03/2022 20:47

I would still date him as I have many friends like this and as long as it’s not affecting what I can eat then it doesn’t bother me.

No one is perfect and if this is his major downfall then I think keep hold of him.

Benes · 17/03/2022 20:54

These threads never go well......
I suffer from ARFID so have real issues with food.
It's not childish, it's not 'toddler' food, it's not ignorant etc etc

You might choose not to date someone with food issues (which is entirely your choice) but there is no need to insult people who have a restricted diet.

mumwon · 17/03/2022 20:54

we eat a wide variety of ethnically diverse food - (we just like eating v-basically - in our family & we different national/ethnic backgrounds.
What we don't do is pontificate about the cultural background of each dish - I mean, really???
We just eat it & sometimes discuss whether we like it & what's in it

YvanEhtNiojYvanEhtNioj · 17/03/2022 20:56

@roastedsaltedpeanut

Food is such a crucial part of my life and I wouldn’t be able to stand anyone with such limited palate. Food is like a snapshot of a culture. Ideally i would like my parents to be able to discuss the culinary technique as well as historical/cultural backgrounds of a famous dish. Whats the most authentic recipe and where to find it etc. Cannot be with someone who isn’t able to step away from toddler food, who potentially carries the genes of not being able to have fun with food. I despair at the thought of a husband and children who can only eat toddler food for the rest of their lives!
Is waffle your favourite food?
Luredbyapomegranate · 17/03/2022 20:59

It doesn’t sound like he doesn’t eat anything else, just that he’s not very adventurous??

I don’t think that matters at all. If you like food the chances are he’ll open up, and he wants to go and have sushi so it can’t be that bad.

Circumferences · 17/03/2022 21:00

To be fair, most people would think my husband only ever ate fish and chips.
Fact is, he only ever orders fish and chips when we eat out (pub lunches etc, he'd obviously order differently if we went to an Indian restaurant).

It's just that when he's ordering meals outside the home he sticks to the simplest most reliable options because it saves him stress and disappointment.

Could this be the case with your new DP, OP?

I mean, you've eaten out twice and your already judging him accusing him of having a "limited diet".

How do you know? He could eat salad and steak tartare at home.

Luredbyapomegranate · 17/03/2022 21:02

@YvanEhtNiojYvanEhtNioj

Well that was unnecessarily bitchy. This is an open forum you know - the joy of it is different opinions and modes of expression. The PPs comment was harmless.

TibetanTerrah · 17/03/2022 21:02

I'm a completely unfussy foodie, and this wouldn't bother me too much UNLESS he pulled faces at the menu and my food. This is often a subconscious thing but I find it so rude and childish.

We'd also have to take it in turns choosing the restaurant/takeaway. I'm not going to be limited and have the fussy person dictate forevermore. Read the menu ahead of time, there's always something for you even if its plain rice and grilled chicken.

I recently went to a Turkish restaurant on a date. After you order they bring you a huge bowl of salad and flatbread while you wait. The suspicious side eye he gave the bowl, the grimace, the "whats in it!?" was such a turn off. I just shrugged and said its lovely, more for me if you don't want to try it.

He was a nice enough bloke but my lasting memory will be the toddler like face pulling.

DillDanding · 17/03/2022 21:02

No. It would be deathly dull and I'd question why his diet is so infantile.

Hard to believe he's a doctor.

CockingASnook · 17/03/2022 21:11

No, absolutely couldn’t date someone with limited tastes. It says a lot about them. I don’t need a serious foodie, who can be just as tedious, but someone with a healthy appetite, who appreciates good food and will try new things. There’s an adage about people who enjoy food being better at sex too.

Benes · 17/03/2022 21:13

There’s an adage about people who enjoy food being better at sex too.

Yeah that's absolute rubbish 🙄

Andacherryonthetop · 17/03/2022 21:16

It wouldn’t bother me but I’m not adventurous with food 😂 love a chicken nugget! And pasta!

betwixtlives · 17/03/2022 21:16

why has he met your dc already?

LemonViolet · 17/03/2022 21:19

For me, if we went to the sushi place and he orders the katsu chicken with no sauce…..I’d at least be having a conversation to find out if he really does only eat such a limited diet. It would probably be a dealbreaker for me unless I was really swept off my feet. For those who keep saying “why does my limited diet affect you….” sharing food, eating and cooking together is an important activity for many people and the ability to do that with a partner is really important for them. Same as if a very sporty/active person probably wouldn’t want to date me cos like hell am I going to go for a run/cycle/gym session with anyone. It’s “nothing personal”. Wouldn’t be an issue if it were a friend, just not compatible in a life partner.

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