How can you tell whether a child will be academic

[Ritamarghita]

Had a chat with a friend today. She got 2 girls, one is year 3, the other is a 3.5 yo pre schooler going to the same nursery as my 4 yo.

She is confident that her older DD will be very academic, however she thinks her younger DD will not be. She says that her older DD was a lot more advanced at 3.5 with reading and writing than the younger DD, also younger DD 'doesn't do well under pressure', whatever that means for a 3.5 yo. I felt a little deflated tbh as my almost 4.5 yo DD cannot read yet, apart from sounding out about 10 basic 3 letter words. She's very good with phonics and a fast learner but we've not focused much on the reading and writing part yet. I come from a country where we start school at 7.

I do want my DD to do well, but hearing of children reading at 3.5 yo makes me feel like I've not done enough for my DD. Can you really tell at this age whether a child will be academic? Is there real value in teaching children to read so early?

I do think my younger DD (2) will be more academic than her sister (6) because I can see how their personalities differ - younger DD will happily sit and be read stories all day, could count to 10, name shapes and colours and had a far wider vocabulary than my elder DD did a lot earlier. My eldest on the other hand has never sat down long enough to focus on books and learning - she is very creative and active but academically she is slightly behind her peers. I don't think there's anything wrong with that though, some children are just not academically inclined but you can't really know for sure at such a young age.

You can’t know at that age, and it doesn’t matter if they are clever or not. What you can do is inspire behaviours that support learning, such as encouraging curiosity, building resilience, helping them to become brave (not in a flinging yourself off a cliff kind of way, more a trying new things, especially things that might scare them a little), help them to find non school things they are good at and can be proud of - a sport, dance, singing (and if you can, let them try lots of things. They’ll drop most of them, but one or two will stick - both of mine are successfully competing in sports they picked up as kids and it’s great for their confidence and social skills), have fun with them - take them to the beach and collect some shells to paint, have a picnic in a forest, lift up a stone and look at bugs, let them choose books in a library, go to all the local events and festivals, bake, roller skate. There is so much more to life than being academic - most jobs don’t rely on being academic - a decent plumber earns more than a Russell Group university lecturer. So let them find their strengths.

You can't tell. Early reading doesn't guarantee anything. But a love of reading and a wide vocabulary is helpful.
Curiosity and enjoying learning I think are what helps children do well academically.
I'd have said my DD was bright, above average but not the cleverest child in her class at Primary. She's an exceptional student at High School. Straight A's are a possibility. She also isn't great under pressure! So we will see 😁 but she really has thrived academically at high school.

I agree with Siepie. Sorry to sound like a twat but I started school being one of the last kids in my class to learn to write my (admittedly long, non-English) name. I very quickly overtook the vast majority of the other kids in my class, I think mostly as I read voraciously as soon as I was able, I remember being one of the first kids in my infant class in yr 2 to be allowed to choose my own normal books to read instead of the school ones. I was listed as G&T in junior school and secondary school, did well in all my exams. My A-Levels admittedly were good but not exceptional due to illness, I went on to a decent uni and got a first class degree. ( However have no career to speak of due to illness, having 2 kids young, discrimination and some bad luck...which I say just to illustrate too that whilst I don't believe there is much/any correlation to a 3 yr Old's 'academic' ability and their subsequent school attainment, I also don't think that very high achievers at school necessarily go on to have great careers and/or earning potential unfortunately!)

I know of a woman who was fast tracked earl on and went to Secondary School a year early. She left before her A levels.

I also know a University Professor who couldn't talk properly until he was 5. My sister got a First (in Fine Arts but it included a written component) and couldn't read until she was 9.

I don't think you can tell but I'd say showing an interest in the things around them and asking questions is more important than 'academic' skills as such.

People like your friend talk a lot of crap.

My niece could not read until 7 and yet became a scholar.

Comprehension is a huge part of the reading journey and where a lot of children stalk for a while.

But in any case, the best thing for your child is to have you on their team whatever their strengths and weaknesses. Your friend is a bit of a dick.

I agree with everyone here. I was a bit surprised that at 3.5 she has already made up her mind about her DD, she went on to say that the DDs will probably be going to different secondary schools, implying older DD will go to a selective school. And I'm sure she will, parents are very involved in her education and I'm sure she'll do very well.

I really can't tell what kind of child my DD is going to be. She seems bright and up for anything, has a wide range of interests, does lots of classes after nursery not because I am pushing her, but because she asks me to. Very social too. But I honestly have no idea how well she will be doing at school.

I don’t think you can tell who’ll be successful academically as it is as much about motivation as intelligence up to degree level. I’m a teacher/tutor and I see super bright but lazy kids not doing half so well as medium intelligence kids who are very hard working.

My eldest is very bright. He could read simple books at two and a half, taught himself all his time tables by five etc BUT he is autistic, dyspraxic and says he ‘doesn’t give a shit’ about most GCSE subjects. He reads Foucault and books about Quantum Physics in his free time but is currently on a grade 4 for English (sigh).

In contrast, I’ve seen a really quite average student get up at 4am to revise every morning for months and come out with fantastic grades. His will to do well was everything. He will do really fantastically in life.

I have three kids. One stood out academically more than the others in reception and year 1/2 and was always one of the better readers and mathematicians etc. This child is now the least academic of my three. The one who took ages to grasp reading is probably the most academic. All are now teenagers and doing exams etc.

@HarlowHenry how interesting!

I think early labelling of children as academic/sporty/below average etc does them no favours.

My DN was labelled by family as 'academic'. She wasn't and isn't. She had her nose in a book to get approval at home and to not appear lonely at school. Her real skill and passion is sewing but doesn't get encouragement to pursue that as it isn't a 'proper' job.

Because the pushy parent will be posting on MN questioning their academic ability.

We live near London in an area where most families move in for the schools. It's got wonderful primary and secondary schools, a few selectives ones, so I do find that parents are very competitive. In some ways I am very anxious about DD starting school.

@GnomeDePlume your DN sounds gorgeous. My DM sews with my DD. I’m hopeless at creative stuff, but it makes my DD so happy, and she creates beautiful things…even at 10. Don’t let anyone crush the creative side of your DN x

As a general rule, those who can read at 3 snd those that can read till 6 will all be about the same level by 7 ( excluding special needs either below or ahead of age group).

I taught preschoolers and reception for 40 years and you really really shouldn't worry.

Let the child just learn through play.

These responses are great to hear. Mines very sporty, bouncy, attention span of a gnat. Getting him to sit still to read is a challenge

I absolutely agree that motivation and drive are huge factors as well. My DD went from excellent grades at 12 to average between 13 and 15, because she’d hit the terrible teens and was more interested in boys than school.😂

Then she suddenly matured and got back on track, she puts in alot of effort now.

Most parents think their PFB are geniuses, but I have one super-clever one and it was very clear from very early on (well before he went to school). However, it wasn't just early reading etc (though he did all of that) - he was just luminously clever, curious, desperate to learn, wanted to sit and make letters with bits of twig if we were at the park etc, when my other DC just wanted to play. He was the same right throughout school and is now the same at Oxbridge.

Even if they are intelligent there’s no guarantee they will use their brains.

My ds did well academically at his prep school and was always at or near the top of the class.
Then he went to a academically selective senior school where there were some really clever boys and he couldn’t compete so he just downed tools.
He enjoyed himself and made the most of all the extra curricular stuff but he didn’t really use his perfectly good brain.

@MsTSwift

Every person without exception who has actually said to other parents that their child is intelligent is always quite thick themselves.

Haha you’ve got a point. Do parents who boast about their dcs intelligence not realise how awful it sounds?

I don't think you can tell. I would say kids who appear to have an attention span of more than 5 seconds you would assume would find school less of a struggle. My dd started school unable to sit still but is doing really well and is focused in year 7. I think a balance is really important. A child who only wants to read or whatever should be encouraged to move about and vice versa.

I don't think you can tell at that age.

My dd has never been academic and I've always thought she'll never be a doctor or brain surgeon, however she's now 14 and getting top marks on her tests and top of the class academically. Tbh I've always said, that as long as she tries her best, that's good enough for us both.

I was a free reader by 5 years and had a high IQ. Went to a selective grammar school where the focus was on maths and science which I was miserable at.
I excelled in the creative arts, English, music, theology.
Subsequently I bombed my GCSEs (got maybe 6 or 7?) where everyone else was getting 11 A*.

None of that has stopped me having an incredibly lucrative career, none of which I have any qualifications for. Mine has been entirely driven by emotional intelligence, experience, taking calculated risk and building very strong relationships professionally.

I would much rather my children have a high EQ than IQ.

So glad to read all these responses x

Being academic requires a number of skills most of which are not apparent in very young children.