Things I’ve just learnt

[hopeful777]

I just found out you can’t put a chopping board in the dishwasher unless you want it to break 😕

as my family are now laughing at me, it made me wonder what other things have people learnt in adulthood that maybe others assume should be intrinsically known?

@ChessMaster3000 See above!

@ LimaCharlieHotelPapa Huh? You stand up to wipe your bum? But, um, don't your cheeks kind of fill the gap you're trying to reach?

@Timeturnerplease

My sister just couldn’t compute that North isn’t always ‘forward’ when she was learning to drive. She’s a highly intelligent and successful individual but this concept just escaped her.

Sorry what??

@Timeturnerplease

That makes no sense. When you're heading to the south coast, you're facing south, not north???

That Edinburgh is farther west than Bristol

Which is true - as is the fact that the capital of Scotland is further north than the capital of Denmark

That Diagonal Alley is Diagonally. And, Knockturn Alley (nocturnally) and Grimaldi Place (Grim, Old Place).

Grew up near a place called a Ibstock. Assumed it was pronounced ‘Poundstock’. Thought there were two Rivers in London. The Thames and the Tems.

Also, your suppose to clean dishwasher arms? I have to try that!

I dunno about Eurostar, but there aren’t even proper windows on the car-transporter trains. It’s like driving your car into the back if a lorry.

@DimebagDarrell

That Berlin isn’t located on the boundary of what was West Germany and East Germany. It’s actually in the middle of what was East Germany.

I’d always thought the Berlin Wall divided East and West Berlin, but no - turns out it was a wall that encircled West Berlin.

Going from West Germany to East Berlin you went through three checkpoints

Checkpoint Alpha West into East Germany
Checkpoint Bravo from East Germany into West Berlin
Checkpoint Charlie from West Berlin to East Berlin

It was quite a journey to make!

Ducks have spiral penises! Never been so shocked, in awe and grossed put at the same time but yep they have curly members!!!

Oh and do not attempt to cook boiled eggs in your mom's brand new combi microwave. They explode and blow the bloody door off!!
And like the split peas make a really eggy mess and stink the house out!

@sunshinesallday

I was 51 years old when I just learnt what "watermelon sugar" is. Do all those teenage girls who love Harry Styles know? My friend just told me!

Yep! It has a raunchy theme.

See also 'She Bop' by Cyndi Lauper. (From the 1980s.) It's a cute bouncy pop song, that's about female masturbation. I used to love the song (still do!) Then I found out around 20 years after it was released, what it was about!

@thisplaceisweird

There are some really stupid comments here but this wins

Stop being so nasty, there's no need for it!
Isn't life quite shit enough without you needlessly making people feel crap??

@NewYearEveryYear

Russia and the USA are practically neighbours...despite being on opposite sides of the map.

I swear I knew the earth wasn't flat. But it hadn't occurred to me that a map joins up at the back.

Sarah palin allegedly once said she could see Russia from her house / or so the story goes.

@Havanananana

That Edinburgh is farther west than Bristol

Which is true - as is the fact that the capital of Scotland is further north than the capital of Denmark

Latitudes are really surprising, I was amazed to learn that New York was on a similar latitude to Madrid. Shetland Islands are closer to Norway than Edinburgh.

"They can also be steam pressed if its needed."

Which may explain why dry cleaning places in Belgium are called 'pressing'.

@WomanStanleyWoman

I was about 20 before I realised there was no such place as ‘Marbaia’ in Spain. I thought ‘Marbella’ was pronounced as written and ‘Marbaia’ was a separate place.

(I know lots of people still mispronounce Marbella, but I think I went the extra mile by inventing a separate place )

A young serviceman was waiting his posting he wanted to be sent to the Hebrides but he told us he was disappointed to be sent to the Hee-Brides, he's never seen Hebrides written down.

@Justkeeppedaling

That "the cloud" is not a cloud. It's a load of servers where the data is stored. I though our data was floating around in the ether, like a cloud (though now that I write that down, it sounds ridiculous )

Oh. 👀

Ummm. Cringe. Really?

Oh fuuuuck I’ve absolutely had conversations about how weird it is that information just kind of … floats about 🤦🏻‍♀️

If a container of 100s and 1000s fall on the floor, they turn into millions and zillions.

@doodlejump1980

I was 35 when I found out that capers are not tiny fish. 35.

I thought they were cucumber buds. Was in my late 40s when I discovered they are not.

@BorisKilledMyHusband
(I hope that's not true?! But if it is I'm really very sorry to hear it 🌷)

Thank you for the avocado video!! I'll try that next time!! I don't stab them, but I do 'karate chop' with the knife! Drooling at his avocado - virtually impossible to get such nice ones in the U.K. it's like the Golden Ticket when you do!!

@Livebythecoast

That the lyrics in the song 'Ironic' by Alanis Morissette are 'it's a death row 'pardon' two minutes too late' - not 'it's a death row 'hard on' two minutes too late' .

absolutely pmsl

I lived in the USA for two years and only found out over two years after I left (through Mumsnet I think), that Americans don't put butter in their sandwiches. I guess I just didn't eat a sandwich during the whole time...

Where do they grow?

@Peppapigforlife

I lived in the USA for two years and only found out over two years after I left (through Mumsnet I think), that Americans don't put butter in their sandwiches. I guess I just didn't eat a sandwich during the whole time...

Butter would be odd here. Mayonnaise and mustard are the standard sandwich condiments.

@Peppapigforlife

I lived in the USA for two years and only found out over two years after I left (through Mumsnet I think), that Americans don't put butter in their sandwiches. I guess I just didn't eat a sandwich during the whole time...

Do they spread the bread with mayonnaise then? That's got oil in it. And they have lots of peanut butter, that's got oil in it too.

@Livebythecoast

I spent years thinking it was a death row hard on too.

@Soubriquet

When this little piggy went to market, he wasn’t popping off down to the shops

I'm still in denial on this one. There was a picture of her with her shopping basket in my Nursey Rhyme book.

Do they spread the bread with mayonnaise then? That's got oil in it. And they have lots of peanut butter, that's got oil in it too.

We do spread the bread with mayo. Peanut butter is only used in sandwiches on its own or with jelly or jam. I'm not sure what the relevance of them containing oil is.