Dreading the weekend, I just want DH to come home

[bloodywhitecat]

But won't be. He can't. I would give anything to have him bounce through the door, declaring "It's the freaking weekend baby!" just one more time. Going off to fetch the Friday night takeaway just one more time. Sitting here, with him next to me. But it is never going to happen. He died 12 days ago, here, peacefully at home. He finally looked like him again instead of being disfigured by the stroke and the pain of his cancer. I know he's at peace now but I miss him so much. This is my first weekend on my own, last week I took the babies (we foster) to my DD's for the weekend but this week I am staying here. Tomorrow I need to find something to wear to say our final goodbyes and I am dreading it.

Oh darling. I'm so so sorry. This is awful. It's clear you loved him very much

(((HUG)))

I feel so sad & angry for you. It's just not bloody fair when good men die! There are enough nasty bastards, cancer should start with them!

Imo memory is shit to pieces, not sure if it's age/menopause or what, but it's crap. So, I can't remember what you chose to get married in, but could you wear that? Woukd DH have liked that?

My Mum wirse a dress my Dad woukd have lived in my Mum. It was dark, but it had flowers on it (sounds ghastly, but it's actually a lively dress).

Have you ordered a takeaway to be delivered tonight?

((Big Hug)). Lots of us around if you want to chat, but if you don't, know we're all thinking about you xx

Oh gosh OP this is heartbreaking. I'm so so sorry

I’m so sorry. You can do this, one breath, on step at a time. My husband died 9 years ago aged 37, it does slowly get better. You may find WAY or WAY-Up very helpful xxx sending all my love

Sending you a really big hug. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thinking of you, white cat - massive hugs and admiration for you. Xx

So sorry for your loss x

Oh @bloodywhitecat I've seen your posts from the start and I'm so very sorry to read this one.

I am sending you lots of love and a massive hug.

You've been amazing throughout. ❤️

Sending strength and love to you, so sorry for you loss 😢💐

So sorry to hear of your loss.

thinking of you.be kind to yourself,make sure you are eating,be brave xxx

I am so sorry, I’ve read a few of your threads and your love for him shines out on your writing.

I am so sorry to read this. I have followed your story from the start and didnt realise your lovely husband had died.
Sending love and strength for tomorrow xxx

So sorry, dearest Whitecat.
Sending you love and a hug through the ether.

My heart goes out to you. May you lay him to rest peacefully tomorrow

So sorry op 💐

I dont know what to say, I cant imagine your pain.

I suppose all you can do is take it hour by hour, day by day.

((bloodywhitecat))

Big hugs x

I’m so sorry for your loss

I could actually feel the pain in your post seems like you really loved each other.I think even if he lived another 100 years you were never ever going to be ready to say goodbye. I know you know its great he's relieved of that pain but maybe try discover something you can cling onto,how about something that was personal to him--that could be something simple like his car key or door key and put it in your pocket anywhere you go for the first few month's and when you feel upset hold it tight and remember him,that might help.

Oh bloodywhitecat I’m so sorry xxx

Whitecat,
I’ve followed your threads and have been humbled and inspired by your courage and strength.
I’m so glad that your husband died at home, that’s what you and he wanted. Please take comfort from the fact that you did everything you could. He sounded so caring, strong and just bloody fantastic from what you posted. A life well worth living, which is not something you can say about everyone. My heart and tears are with you today.

Find something lovely to wear tomorrow. It really doesn’t matter what, just something he would have liked to see you in.

Please find peace in the end of his suffering.

I’m thinking of you and your fosterlings and your daughter tonight.

Xxx

Thinking of you - so very sorry for your loss 😢

I am so very sorry for your loss. He sounded like a great guy and you obviously had a very loving marriage x