Will you be opening your home up to Ukrainian refugees?

[musicalfrog]

Interested to see how popular this will be considering so many of us want desperately to make a tangible difference.

My OH wouldn't be up for it I don't think, and we don't have a spare room so I will avoid that particular argument. But otherwise I think it would be such a great thing to do.

The govt is asking for a minimum commitment of 6 months. Will you be signing up?

I think there's a lot of naivety. Housing a refugee isn't the same as sharing with a lodger and I do worry that some people volunteering haven't really considered the reality of how traumatising war is, and how much support refugees need. What happens when they do realise? Are the refugees dumped on the street again?

I agree with a PP that the government is suggesting a sticking plaster rather than providing an appropriate response with the necessary infrastructure. People might feel they are 'helping' but it's very easy to cause further trauma and upset. Most refugees need specialised support. Hosts feeling like saviours and people treating refugees like it's a house share isn't the ideal solution.

I admire the drive to 'do' something and to help but this is the usual half-arsed, not properly funded, unsustainable and uncompassionate response that typifies the current government.

On a personal level we have a flat that we're in the middle of renovating and when it's finished, I'd offer it to the scheme but I can't help thinking that by getting involved it's allowing the government to run away from their responsibilities again, and also that dumping refugees into a flat may fulfil one basic need but it isn't going to help emotionally or psychologically. And since we both work and have DC, we're not able to provide the time and support that a resettlement programme needs. I've worked with refugees. I've also worked with staff who offer psychosocial support. The brutal reality is that families are either going to be emotionally ill-equipped to deal with the refugees or they're going to inadvertently put their own MH at risk by the way they interact with them.
It's fairly typical of the current government that they can find millions for contracts for their friends but not for a robust and safe response to refugees. But then again, successive governments have failed refugees in this country.

if I was a landlord with empty rentals, I would certainly enquire into helping refugees

I suspect that will turn out to be a tiny proportion of the outcome and probably only short-term, while longer term accommodation is located and prepared.

Doubtful, many many afghan refugees are stuck in hotels still awaiting the magical longer term accommodation to materialise.

I haven't read the whole thread but so far nobody has mentioned the benefits of putting somebody up in your house. It's not quite the same but we've had a few young people staying in our house to help with the garden etc in exchange for bed and board and it's been fun.

Longest was for three months. It was interesting getting to know them, had some really fun mealtimes with games afterwards, and it has really helped with our children's social skills and taught them about generosity, hospitality and sharing. When I was growing up, my parents invited various children from more deprived backgrounds to stay with us over the summer and it taught us a lot, something I've wanted to pass on to my own children. I want them to learn kindness and generously and the best way is by modelling it. Yes it's a sacrifice loosing your spare room for six months and money will be tight but bloody hell we are the lucky ones here.

We dont have a spare room.

I would offer an air bed in the lounge, because the thòught of a mum with a young child homeless is awful.

Im sure there must be better options for them. (Maybe some sort of youth hostle or caravan park which i would think were fairly quiet this time of year )

I don't have any spare capacity (my toddler is still in my room because of that) but even so, no I don't think I could. I wouldn't be comfortable with a complete stranger in my house around my children.

Does anyone know if there are agencies working with children who have lost their parents? These children are so vulnerable and must need a home. We have loads of toys in the garage from when the children were younger. I have 2 teen boys and we could offer a room to a mother and child or a child who is orphaned. Breaks my heart.

@saraclara
Yes, this is true. Your refugee may spend all day, and night, sobbing. They may not speak. The children may become angry or aggressive. They might not, but it won’t necessarily all be cosy suppers in the kitchen.

yes

I don't think I would offer. We live rurally, and both work full time with a 1 year old. Public transport is rubbish here, and the nearest town is 15-20 min drive away. I would end up taking on too much offering constant runs into town or this or that. I'm struggling to cope as it is, and that for 6 months + might finish me. If we were in a town with amenities on the doorstep or decent public transport I would be more open to it. I also WfH, and our spare room is my office, which would be another issue.

I can't help thinking that by getting involved it's allowing the government to run away from their responsibilities again, and also that dumping refugees into a flat may fulfil one basic need but it isn't going to help emotionally or psychologically.

You're not wrong, but it would solve the immediate need of accommodation for someone. It's better to be traumatised and housed than traumatised and homeless.

I would love to, but I can't afford it. Our house is really small plus spare bedroom is used for husband's work stuff, but I think if there was a need we could clean it up and cope somehow, but as I said money struggles.

I hope there will be stringent checks to make sure people are vetted before any Ukrainian women/children can stay in their houses. This could easily be open to abuse.

Not a chance. Just because there is a military conflict there it doesn't make all of them saint. Their is the same % of criminals and dangerous people among them like in every other nation. It would be unsafe to invite a complete strange from any country in your home.

Our ex-housing minister, Robert Jendick, owns three houses, one of which is Grade 1 listed. We are the 5th or 6th richest countries in the world. We are the one of the less densely populated countries in the world, certainly in Europe (I think golf courses take up far more room than housing estates in England). Less than 5% of our land is urbanised. If we wanted, we could energise our economy and start rebuilding social housing, without it affecting our economy adversely. But we won't do it because it migh affect profits.

It's very okay to say "no". This is a voluntary scheme, and what you'd be volunteering for is a big thing that'll take lots of resources, and effort. The vast majority of people won't be able to do it. Nevertheless, a lot of us will.

Maybe it's a reaction based in unecessary guilt or fear, but imagine if some of the thoughtless bleatings from some PPs actually persuaded people to not volunteer when they otherwise would have? Stuff like 'it won't work', 'think of the logistics', ''you couldn't leave them in your home alone', '10% are criminals'. Cop on people - it's fine to not volunteer, but it is not fine to try and talk others out of it, or to poo-poo the idea altogether - that's just mean. Have some humanity, and think more about what you're saying please.

Also, just in case the 10% are criminals comment got you, in the BBC news article on this it says it's estimated that around half of the two million refugees from Ukraine are children. Criminals my arse.

I’m thinking about it, but I can’t afford to heat the house all day , and I can’t afford to feed them more then a few days, so it really depends if the government are going to help out financially.

No, I don't have the space and my partner has multiple disabilities. He wouldn't be able to cope with a stranger in the house and I don't have the headspace for it, never mind the physical space, after working FT and caring for him outside of work.

I wonder how many MPs (those with spare rooms) will be opening their homes?

It'll be interesting to hear what the insurance companies say about this.

It would be good if a parallel support scheme could run alongside these proposals, whereby people who cannot house a refugee can financially support a person who theoretically could but who is too skint to take on the extra costs.

So I could, say, pay someone's gas bill for a month to help out, or pay any insurance uplift for 6 months, or buy a supermarket shop.

I live in an extremely small house with no spare room or room to sleep downstairs but when we move to a bigger place, hopefully very soon, I absolutely would yes.

I think it’s interesting idea I live alone in a largish house and have a good size spare room with a bathroom. But I live in a very rural location so no work available and very limited public transport although I do have 2 cars. I’ve previous had au pairs from Eastern Europe so am used to are relative strangers living with me I loved having them and I’m friendly and hospitable. My only concern is the finances I have a reasonable job/salary but for work I’m a high milage driver currently paying £240 per month in fuel and I worry about increasing petrol cost oil costs for my heating electricity and food. I also get a council tax reduction because I live alone. I think I would struggle to pay the inevitable increases if I had someone living with me unless they got financial help and were able to cover the increase.

Being discussed on women's hour now.

We have a spare room and I’d really like to do it. Persuading the other half of my marriage will be challenging. If I lived alone I’d do it in a heartbeat.

No I wouldn't. I like my privacy and don't like having people to stay in general.

I think a lot of people say they would but in reality, probably wouldn't. It's like saying you'd love to adopt a child ..it's the socially acceptable thing to say but most people don't mean it