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I'm a terribly unsympathetic wife, please tell me I'm not alone!

87 replies

KitKat1985 · 04/03/2022 21:30

DH has a cold, a bad cold to be fair but still a cold. He definitely is a bit 'man flu' about these things and has taken time off work this week and there has been a lot of complaining about how ill he is etc. I've tried to be sympathetic but the thing I've really struggled with is for the past 3 days he has just been constantly coughing as loudly as possible, blowing his nose as loudly as possible, or making 'throat clearing' noises. I'm convinced he could be doing these things quieter than he is - it's like he's doing it extra loud for sympathy and 'dramatic effect'.

I've had a bit of shitty day. The kids have been noisy and shouting all evening. They've finally gone to bed and all I want to do is watch some TV with a glass of wine in peace and he won't stop with the coughing and nose blowing. I've eventually snapped at him and asked him to shut up. He's now very huffy with me about how unsympathetic I am. I've apologised but please tell me I'm not the only one who isn't always Florence Nightingale......

OP posts:
StripeyDeckchair · 05/03/2022 20:43

I can't stand anybody when they're ill.
I'm not a nurse, I'm squeamish at the best of times and we have all the usual drugs etc in the bathroom cupboard so go to bed (in the spare room) & emerge when you're feeling better.

I also hate people fussing over me when I'm ill. Leave me alone.

Savvysix1984 · 05/03/2022 20:49

My dh has covid. I've lost all sympathy. I am happy to pick up the slack at home, provide food, drinks and medicine but I can't actually give sympathy anymore. He thinks he has it bad. Me and dc had it in December so I didn't have the luxury of lying in bed all day as dc (not as ill as me) still needed food, entertainment etc.
yes the loud coughing, hacking and sneezing is a pita.

mydogisthebest · 05/03/2022 21:01

@NRRK28

My god! I guess all man are the same. Everytime my DH ill. He needs all attention in the world. I think its worst than my 6yo when he is sick 🤣🤣. Its just make me angry. To be honest i never bother to nurse my DH everytime he is sick. I’ll be annoyed as hell. I just make him food thats it.
No, not all men are the same. My DH is very rarely ill but when he is he never moans about it and just carries on as normal.

I am ill far more often and I get really bad migraines. He is always sympathetic and does everything for me

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Ohyesiam · 05/03/2022 21:05

I don’t know how to post it here but look on YouTube for
Man/ Woman Man Flu Sketch

TravelDreamLife · 05/03/2022 21:26

DH isn't dramatic when sick, but I lack sympathy because he gets out of bed, lies on the couch all day watching tv, snoring or breathing so loudly it sounds like he's got a death rattle.

Whereas if I'm ill I don't get rest. I'm up anyway, getting kids off to school, etc. as usual while DH goes to work, or tells me to 'leave it' but doesn't think to do anything unless instructed.

CeratopsofthePharoahs · 05/03/2022 22:08

DH doesn't milk it when he's ill. He actually prefers to hunker down in bed and be left alone until spring arrives he feels better.

Unfortunately this lead to him neglecting a chest infection that has left him with scarred airways so whenever he gets a cold he gets A Cough.

He was sent home from work last week because The Cough had made an appearance. He said that due to corona they didn't think it was a good idea he was in work. Actually I think his boss heard the noise and decided that he wasn't going to put up with that for days so sent him home. So my peace was shattered. However it was half term so I didn't have any peace anyway.

problembottom · 05/03/2022 23:00

DP has the loudest sneeze known to man. He has the best stocked medicine cabinet you’ve ever seen and takes pills for everything. When I was pregnant he had really bad sympathy pains and he was ill after DD was born with a mysterious ailment and unable to do much at all.

He’s healthy and fit and has never spent a night in hospital. My sympathy is limited non existent so he turns to his indulgent mum, who I feel is to blame for a lot of his carry on.

iklboo · 05/03/2022 23:03

DH sort of gets on with it. But his IQ seems to drop into his boots. It's like talking to a tired toddler trying to get anything out of him.

Cravingsweets · 05/03/2022 23:58

@Carbiesdreamhouse

DH seems to permanently "coming down with something" or "feeling rough" so I've lost all patience with the boy who cried 'urrrgh'
Mine too! Drives me mad 🤣
BIWI · 06/03/2022 00:57

@Ohyesiam

I don’t know how to post it here but look on YouTube for Man/ Woman Man Flu Sketch
I linked to that sketch earlier in the thread @Ohyesiam!
Ohyesiam · 06/03/2022 18:02

@BIWI
Wise woman !

Hrpuffnstuff1 · 06/03/2022 18:37

When I was in hospital with bi-lateral pneumonia and sepsis, ex-wife asked if she could go home as it was late and I looked alright.😂😂
This past month I'm getting over legionnaires disease. (Caught it at work).
Current DW is still insisting on keeping the deadlines she set for our business obligations. She moved the deadline forward a week.

I just think women aren't sympathetic in general.

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