Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Failed to stop for police - why am I such an idiot?!

284 replies

ilovelamp2 · 21/02/2022 15:52

Having an absolute melt down over here - hope someone can talk me down and/or make me feel better by telling me silly things you have done when driving ..... Basically, I was on a narrow road, one lane each way, fairly chunky verge. Blue lights behind, panicked and drove few 100 metres to next roundabout to get out of way. Totally, totally know now I should have just stopped on side but I panicked. So embarrassed. Police pointed to wind my window down when they got alongside me. They were understandably irrate. I have a lot of respect for our police force and am mortified that I have made their job even more difficult than it already is. Literally cannot stop sobbing!

OP posts:
ThomasinaGallico · 21/02/2022 22:27

@SunshineCake1

I'm not being offensive but if she can't hear sufficiently then she may need stronger hearing aids.
You do not understand hearing loss. It isn’t like short/long sightedness which can be well corrected with glasses. Hearing aids can only make you get the best out of what you have - you will never hear like a normal person. And they are notoriously poor in complex soundscapes with background noise. Hearing loss can also cause you to react slower to sound cues than someone with normal hearing; this doesn’t make the OP a bad driver, just a driver who operates a bit differently.

I’m fairly sure that the OP would have had fairly serious grounds for complaint had she been stopped.

NeedWineNow · 21/02/2022 22:37

It so irritates me when they do this. I had something similar years ago. I was waiting at lights at the bottom of a hill. My lane was either go straight on or turn left. Right hand lane was a filter to turn right only. Police car came roaring down behind me with blues and twos going so I made a judgement call, saw the road was safe and pulled round to the left and stopped safely so they could get through. They pulled alongside me and gave me a mouthful for going through a red light. I was so shocked I yelled back about them frightening me, and said they couldn't ha been in that much of a hurry at which point they just drove off. Buggers.

Itsalmostanaccessory · 21/02/2022 22:54

You dont drive through a red.

If you have passed your test and read the highway code, you would know that. Going through a red us dangerous. You dong make a judgement call about that. The police will manoeuvre around you if possible. If not, they will wait.

If you didnt know not to go through a red then read the highway code again.

Hotair1234 · 22/02/2022 17:52

Agree with previous posts - not hurrying if they stopped.

In line with original post if it helps - driving in London (which rarely do) leaving my brothers house late at night and managing volume of traffic. Driving slowly up old Georgian style road, cars parked either side so but if a squeeze. Car coming towards flashing his lights aggressively so I defensively shout back he should pull in to a gap and let me past.
As we draw level and me still making rude gestures he lowers his window, flashes his warrant card and points out I’m driving the wrong way up a one way road! Blushing doesn’t even come close!!!

MMUmum · 22/02/2022 17:55

I've been driving for 33 years and hate every minute since I started, I feel your pain and as I get older it does indeed get worse.
I was stopped by a police woman late at night who asked if I knew why she stopped me! When I said no she was quite surprised, she said I had cut her up on a roundabout which I am sure I did not, I aplogised anyway and she told me to be more careful. I was upset because I felt stupid being told off, but I do believe she was disappointed not to find a drink driver. Try not to let it knock your confidence 🥰🥰

Lana1z · 22/02/2022 17:56

This is one of those situations where your mind is being really harsh with you. You need a big dose of self-compassion right now- you panicked (normal human response), they could have been kinder, be kind and gentle with yourself x

Scotland32 · 22/02/2022 17:56

I once got bo*ocked by (two male) police because I failed to stop when they flashed me in an unmarked car on a rural road! They literally could have been anyone. One of them couldn’t understand why I felt unsafe stopping. The other one eventually seemed to get it. Sometimes they just behave like knbs like anyone else I suppose!

Kjpt140v · 22/02/2022 17:57

It couldn't have been much of an emergency if they took their time telling you to wind the window down. I'm a retired firefighter who drove appliances. I would prefer cars to accelerate to a safe place than risk me not getting by. You've done the right thing as far as I am concerned.

PUGMEISTER21 · 22/02/2022 17:58

If there is no where safe to pullover then you are OK to continue until safe tondo so. There are some S near where I live and it would be extremely dangerous to let someone pass on these. It would be safer to get through them until the road straightens and everybody has better visibility for safety reasons. Don't beat yourself up.

Solely · 22/02/2022 17:58

Whilst you are obliged to stop when there is an emergency vehicle behind you, you also need to make sure you're in a safe and suitable place for them to take over. You didn't do wrong.

Hasselhoffsheadband · 22/02/2022 18:00

@Scotland32

I once got bo*ocked by (two male) police because I failed to stop when they flashed me in an unmarked car on a rural road! They literally could have been anyone. One of them couldn’t understand why I felt unsafe stopping. The other one eventually seemed to get it. Sometimes they just behave like knbs like anyone else I suppose!
See, before recent events I would have thought it so strange for a policeman in an unmarked car to try and stop someone by flashing them, and not be able to understand why a woman wouldn't stop.

But since all the revelations coming out about the police, I can well believe this. It just seems like it's wall to wall misogyny and a pretty significant smattering of dangerous blokes as well.

PlntLady · 22/02/2022 18:13

One lane each way.... was there a reason they couldn't safely overtake you? I.e. blind bends, central solid lined, on coming traffic... etc?
They definitely were not in a rush of they stopped to pull you on it. Sounds like someone was on a power trip to me. I'd forget about it.

turtle16 · 22/02/2022 18:14

To make you feel better I’ll post my occurrence with the police.
I was driving up a dual carriageway and was probably speeding. There were a few cars to overtake and then I was taking the next exit off.
The first car I overtook was an undercover police car, they pulled out into the outside lane overtook me when I went into the inside lane ready to take the exit and then put their lights on and waved me to pull over. I was on the exit and indicating to exit so I continued to exit and lost them.
I was peeing my pants for weeks waiting for a letter in the post saying I was being called to court for failure to stop. But luckily nothing came.

Amnotamug · 22/02/2022 18:20

TBH I would complain about this to local police force . Their behaviour was intimidating you . You did the right thing pulling over ,when you thought it was safe to do so ! Relax and have a glass of wine !

Powerflower22 · 22/02/2022 18:20

I’ve done exactly the same thought they were chasing someone and sped up so I could pull out of their way! 😂 don’t worry about it unless they are charging you?

Bluecatsalltheway · 22/02/2022 18:22

Exactly the same happened to me.
I was driving on a narrow street one line each way, horrible high kerb.
I spotted the police with lights on rushing behind me- I slowed down and stopped, however the traffic coming opposite direction kept moving freely so I was keeping the police behind me as they couldn’t overtake me.
They manage to overtake me and when passing me the both police man turned their head on me with horrible look.
I was also worried as newish driver I wasn’t not that confident and never had this before..

Rover83 · 22/02/2022 18:22

I had this once at a traffic light roundabout when I'd just passed my test. The lights were red I moved to the side as much as I could without going through the red light and the police officer shouted at me that I should have gone through the red light as it was an emergency but I still don't believe that is correct. It shook me up a lot and I still panic every time I'm stuck in front of an emergency vehicle

Hummingbird10 · 22/02/2022 18:23

Chill, my friend! Let’s just say I live in close quarters with the bill and I think they enjoy this sort of thing. It’s them in the wrong, not you. As others have said if they were in that much of a hurry then they had absolutely no business getting all caught up in a minor skirmish with you when they had actual policing duties to attend to. They are fully aware that people often panic when they see blue lights and it’s very hard to perform what would have had to be an emergency stop, with blue lights up your derrière. Do not waste another moment of your potentially happy time on this matter. You are exonerated. Case closed m’Lud!

DinosaurDuvet · 22/02/2022 18:26

Sound like they were on a power trip to be honest! Don’t give it a second thought OP

JuergenSchwarzwald · 22/02/2022 18:28

But since all the revelations coming out about the police, I can well believe this. It just seems like it's wall to wall misogyny and a pretty significant smattering of dangerous blokes as well

Indeed.

And ladies if you take nothing else from this thread - if you think someone is following you, even if it's obvious it's a police or other emergency vehicle you do not have to stop immediately, you can definitely go to a police station, garage or somewhere else safe like a supermarket car park. If the police have a go, you just have to say Wayne Couzens to them and complain to your local Police Commissioner.

Obviously if they just want to get past you, you let them by when you perceive that it is safe to let them by/pull over etc. But we don't all have advanced driver training and what they may think is safe might not be what we think is safe. Doesn't matter. We're the ones in charge of our car.

LittleGwyneth · 22/02/2022 18:32

I'm surprised anyone has 'a lot of respect for the police force' these days honestly.

Felix125 · 22/02/2022 18:33

You are only suppose to move over when its safe to do so. The blue lights are basically asking you to "allow them through - if you can"

If its not safe to do so at the time, driving to the next roundabout seems fair enough to me.

Its up to the police to find a lane of least resistance and make progress when they can, the shouldn't be bullying you or berating you for this.

22 years driving blues & twos - and i would never have done this to you!

August1980 · 22/02/2022 18:39

Hey OP, I once drove onto oncoming traffic to let a fire engine pass - in France…. They were ALL telling me off! Husband in the passenger seat, kids,, my dog, Drivers, pedestrians, shop keepers, fire fighters, dog walkers 😬. I just panicked…brain freeze.. so I totally understand how you feel. I then had to drive to my destination shaking and in my state of nerves made so many errors people kept honking at me… I flat out refused to drive for the rest of the trip! I was so nervous.. it happens. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You know some people are just quicker than others coping in an emergency situation. It bloody irritates me how my husband calmly manages to make space for emergency services on the road.. it’s like a space just opens up for him…

Footgoose · 22/02/2022 18:41

Been in a similar situation, single lane carriage way, grass verge either side. In my instance, the police car was coming towards me down the middle of both lanes. I breakers heavily and swerved into the verge to let them through. The car behind me didn’t do the same and hit me hard from behind. You can’t win .

Bebethany · 22/02/2022 18:43

@ilovelamp2 I’m emergency services, we are use to people panicking so please do not worry too much, you really have scolded yourself too harshly. It’s our job to weave around you, the officer should of turned off the blues and sounded an air horn or siren on a short blast. just pull over if it ever happens again.

Swipe left for the next trending thread