If you were a nervous driver who "got over it"...

[AwkwardPaws27]

How? What worked?

I feel like a complete failure of a person. I have a driving licence, passed first time & did Pass Plus, drove about three times and then didn't have a car for a while.

Its now been about 5 years and I've still not got behind the wheel because I am fucking terrified that I will hurt someone.

Just talking about the idea of having refresher lessons or going somewhere quiet to practice makes me feel sick.

How do I get over it?

You drive. End of.

This ^^

Practice, practice, practice, then practice some more.

I refreshed by driving around industrial estates. Had some CBT over the phone and online. I agree drive as much as possible. Good luck.

I became extremely anxious about driving a few years ago. I picked up a speeding ticket and for some reason it triggered a huge lack of confidence about everything from being judged by other drivers for minor things to catastrophic fears about accidents I could cause and going somewhere busy but getting lost/being unable to find parking, etc.

Obviously, it probably wasn't just about the speeding ticket but at it's worst every journey was a thought and I would worry all day (or day before) about any drives I had to do. I would try and get out of driving as much as I could. It's fluctuated quite a lot over the last few years and of course lockdowns haven't helped.

I only learned to drive in my late 20s and didn't get my own car till a few years later and I never really felt like ' a driver' (a kind of impostor syndrome, I suppose).

Like lots of others have said, the best advice is just to drive. I used to go to an evening class somewhere really awkward (and busy) to get to and part of the reason I did it was it kept me used to city driving.

Start small but do it regularly and vary/extend your routes when and where you can. I really feel for you OP. My driving anxiety wasn't good last summer but because I've had to do some driving in other towns and cities since (same places regularly) it's built my confidence and made all my local journeys seem minimal in comparison and I've got back to a stage where I can jump in the car without dreading it.

I’ve gD terrible driving anxiety, took me 9 tests as well. I would literally shake with fear every time I got in the car. ThingsI found helped was always having a passenger, doing familiar routes. Always having the sat nav on. Sat nav had a reassuring voice. In the beginning I would talk out loud to myself what I was doing. This drove my husband mad though!

I just had to drive. I got used to short distances, then felt more confident going on and off the motorway. Until finally I had to do a 1hr drive on my own with kids in the car and had to negotiate busy and scary junctions and roundabouts. It was fine. I mean, I had a wee cry once I got in my house after, but I did it.

And then I just kept doing the scary drives. Last year I had to do a 500 mile journey on my own with the kids, including driving on and off a ferry. I had no choice, had tk be done. Felt proud that I did it.

It took many years not to feel sick and anxious behind the wheel. But I couldn't let it lapse and let myself be scared. I just kept doing it.

To add: i passed 3rd time when I was about 26. I didn't drive regularly till I was 32. And that was only short local drives. My first scary journey was when I was 35, about 5 years ago. The 500 mile one last year.

I half wish I'd been braver but I also really like walking short distances and I love getting the train for longer ones. But it was also easy to not drive and I just couldn't stay in that comfort zone any more

@AwkwardPaws27 I don’t suppose you’re around for an update? As this is now me 😖

I’m 31 years old and passed when I was 19, took me a good year or so to get the courage to drive but when I did I was unstoppable. Drove daily to and from work, different places for days out, even a 5 hour journey to Wales and various other places for mini weekends away etc.

I got really ill with something when I was 26 and I had to give up my job meaning I couldn’t afford my car anymore, I was also bedbound so couldn’t drive anyway. I basically haven’t properly driven since and now life is very different. I’m healthy again and have two sons. I have a brand new, shiny, beautiful car on my drive since May this year and I’ve driven it maybe a handful of times because I am SO SO nervous. The nerves make me feel like throwing up.

Please say this got easier for you? Did you overcome it? 😩