Things you thought you'd invented, but you didn't

[PupInAPram]

I'll start. The disposable toilet brush. Anti spot face masks. Tinting mascara. One day I'll be ahead of the game 😂

I worked at a bank in the 80's and pondered out loud how useful it would be to be able to use your hole-in-the-walk card directly in shops... and was then convinced I'd been overheard and my idea stolen when debit cards were introduced a few months later!

@Lorddenning1

I don't think my invention has been made yet, when I was younger I was obsessed with matching nail polish to outfits, I thought wouldn't it be great if you could pop into Superdrug with your top or dress and scan it and a machine would make that colour nail polish, basically the BnQ paint thing but for nail polish. You could even go further with lipstick and eyeshadow

Oooh I’d love this

I invented taggies, those cloths with all the shiny tags on for babies. When DS1 was a baby (he's now 22) he was obsessed with the tag on the muslin he used to have, and he'd rub it between his fingers. I used to say to DH that we sew loads of tags on to a muslin.

What is this app?
@linmanuel it used to be called iConcertCal - dunno if it still exists or is supported...

Video phones.

I remember saying to my mate aged about 15 (we had older boyfriends who were cheats but we were obsessed and had no self worth ) that if our phones could show us them on camera we'd know when they were lying and they wouldn't be able to sleep with other girls.

Yes I was very naive and also, that would be considered super controlling now!

Glow in the dark dummies, so you don't have to turn a light on when stumbling round round in the night to find baby's dummy. Thought it was genius until I realised they already make them.

In the early 60s, my parents said how handy a gadget to plug in plug sockets would be to stop my brother trying to stick things in them.....he grew up to be an electrician!

Saucy sauce/mayo chup
That ketchup & mayo combo! I swear I invented it as a teenager!

I invented a lazy dauphinoise tonight. Creamy mashed potato topped with sliced potato drizzled with cream. It went down a treat. I think I’m the first person to have thought of this but on the other hand I’m sure I can’t be!!

The phrase' sounds good on paper '

Apparently not

😔

I worked in a dental surgery many years ago and we had to spend ages folding appointment letters and putting them in envelopes - I always used to dream of a contraception which would do all of that for you and one day I would invent it. Later got a crappy temp job in an office where they had a machine that did exactly that! It was shit though because I spent more time removing mangled paper than it would have taken to do by hand!

As a child, I thought I had invented the brilliant hack of resting your swimming goggles on your forehead when not using them...

The plot to fight club. I’m still not sure tbh.

I made a gin with ginger ale and thought I invented a new, amazing cocktail. It was last year

When I was a kid I distinctly remember making up the joke

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Dr
Dr Who?
You just said it

I was devastated when someone in school said it and then informed me it was a joke already

My DH is convinced he invented mustard mayonnaise at uni 30yrs ago

When dd1 was a few weeks old I thought I had invented a sort of overnight sleeping room. I longed to stay in one overnight to have some sleep. Turns out I was so tired I forgot that hotels existed.

The knicker twist

Sex - back in the day

Screw on water bottle lids that are actually children’s teats. Was gutted to find out I wasn’t the first.

@Discwriter

I made a gin with ginger ale and thought I invented a new, amazing cocktail. It was last year

I thought I’d invented this when I stuttered whilst ordering a ginger ale when very sleep deprived. It was my go to drink for many years! In hindsight I should have realised when the barmaid didn’t bat an eyelid…

@Wren77

Mini indoor frisbees. I was going to call them frizbits - inspired by chucking the top of a pringles tube around!

Pringles lids fit snuggly onto some pint glasses ( mainly bitter pots ) tight enough for you to be able to upend the glass without spilling any . I thought they would be great to prevent drinks been spiked and local takeaways and cab companies could advertise on them . Unfortunately they don't fit enough glasses to make it viable.

@minipie

When I was a teenager I invented a new insult, by mixing together the words Twit and Prat.

Turns out it already existed

@minipie I thought the same. I was so pleased with coming up with a new insult that I playfully called my Dad a Twat and was shocked when I got a bollocking!

🥺 adding salt to mash potato it's the secret ingredient 🥺
Also a semi solid especially adapted tent for people who have disabilities and love camping 2010 I remember my mum and ex laughing at me about it.... Something similar is available now.

@DanteThunderstone imagine the royalties if you had invented masturbation 😂
@minipie I also thought as a child I had made a clever new 'not swear word' by combining twit and prat. Used it quite a bit until someone clued me in!
@NarcissistsEyebrows I will be making your invention later, you need to patent it.

@puddlesofmothers

Brown and tomato sauce on a bacon sandwich.

Yep @puddlesofmothers please uninvent this. Brown OR red. Both together is very, very wrong 🤢