What do you do when you make new friends and they just don’t ‘get you’.
I’m not working out to look better only. It’s a general lifestyle I’ve always been into fitness and play tennis and swim and run as part of ‘stuff I do’. Makes me so happy. I also don’t mind a lot of alone time.
But I get the same conversation every morning from my friend at the school gates - trying to take me to the coffee shop to chat.
Last year ( when we met) it went from both of us walking down to the gym and I’d say good bye to her there, or walking down the riverside, walking elsewhere…(with a coffee) because I was actually running in the evenings and playing tennis - and when I did some damage to my shoulder I did end up going to sit at the coffee shop, instead of going to the gym.
She LOVED this. Quite how much I had not realised.
But now, my shoulder has been fixed. I am back at the gym.
I understand we became close. She felt great. I usually felt like I’d wasted my day if I’d spent half the morning at a coffee shop, though still a little good that I had been there for her, and listened to her, helped her, advised her. She often said it’s like having a therapist / big sister.
I’ve advised her to actually book an appointment with a real therapist because she may need that for deeper rooted problems.
Since this January and my back and shoulder had been fixed, I’ve gone back to the gym. How to resume my old life?
Every morning she’s upset or trying hard to convince me I can go to the coffee shop first before the gym. I have not once caved. But she doesn’t know how pissed off I am by this constant manipulation.
She will send me pictures and messages of her having a coffee alone !
Also meeting up at other times does not seem to work…
I hate feeling guilty and selfish for not being there for someone. She enjoys my company and has taken it really hard and constantly comments that she feels dumped.