What's the weirdest job someone you know does?

[BowerOfBramble]

I mean the ones that you'd never heard of until someone you met/a friend of a friend said "oh yes I run a bat sanctuary/teach maths to prisoners/paint portraits of dead hamsters".

@HarrietSchulenberg

Or rather, cow inseminator and bull sperm extractor.

Ohhh my dad’s friend does that and I didn’t even stop to think that was weird

My friend used to be William Shakespeare in Stratford Upon Avon. He's on the local Monopoly box too. And has a life sized cardboard cutout of himself (dressed as WS) on his landing. Scared the fuck out of me when I came out the bathroom and thought he was stood outside the door listening to me

@Hawkins001

Reading with intrigue

I reckon I'd be good at that - do you know if one needs any special training or qualifications?

Coolest job - makes the trailers for blockbuster Hollywood movies and mixes in those circles.

Weirdest job, this was years and years ago - knew an old couple who were chicken sexers and got paid a fortune for it! Apparently it’s a real skill to tell the difference between male and female chickens and they were in very high demand.

Trains people who have to go into dangerous territory (NGOs etc) how to respond in hostage situations by recreating the hostage situation, like having them lined up with guns etc and shouting at them.

Oh I know loads! Love this thread!!!

1. Master forger - think along the lines of Catch me if you can. She’s is an amazing artist and can replicate anything paper. She works on movie sets. She also did special assignments with the law enforcement.

1. Batman. He is responsible for bat’s conservation. He tracks species, numbers, locations etc.

1. Someone who specialises in increasing the sugar I. Sugar beet. He comes and takes sample of your beet. He then says what amount of which chemicals to use to increase the sugar level.

I could go all night. Lol

I know a voice actor who does lots of character voices for video games, a traditional wooden boat-builder and a Humanist Celebrant.

First thing I thought when I saw thread title is my SIL looks after bat conservation she goes into woods and does this clicky thing to count them.

My friend’s mother teaches maths to prisoners

DH is a newsreader, he's telling me about the man that turns up to set each day to stand in each of the presenter's spots so that the camera guys can check the lighting. And then he disappears until the next broadcast. I think he's winding me up.

I knew someone who mapped sand dunes for military defence. They'd wake her in the night sometimes with satellite pictures after a sandstorm and she'd map them. I was hugely impressed.

I also met a woman who was an eco spy. She posed as a tourist who wanted to buy ivory and got the names and addresses of illegal ivory dealers, then handed them to the police in the local areas. I thought she was an absolute hero.

The person responsible for the contract manufacture of Viagra.

In the navy, checks fish for bombs.

Trades in human bones.

@FelicityBeedle

I know a blacksmith, she gets real joy of making people guess her job. They never get it

My sisters bil was a blacksmith.

@Clevs Now I have ‘My Lovely Horse’ running through my head 😃

@Hellocatshome

I have a friend who counts turtles in the Carribean

That's the job I want from this thread

I’m jealous of all the people who get to work with bats!

I know a guy who designs the fake rocks for places like themed swimming pools and mini golf courses.

My daughter analyses the gas in (animal) poo in order to make biofuel.

Well, it's pretty obvious someone must do this job, but I'd never thought about it. I had a number of discussions with the chap employed by my council to work out exactly where the markings on the road should be painted.

This came about because I had observed that drivers were confused on the approach to a roundabout near my home. I regularly saw them swerve into a different lane as they suddenly (incorrectly) thought they were in the wrong lane, and then discover they'd been in the correct lane originally and swerve back again. It was very dangerous.

So I phoned the council and was put through to this guy. And he LOVED his job. He was very interested and excited when I explained the issue. He phoned me up several times subsequently to give me a detailed explanation of his thinking on the matter . I did try assuring him that I knew he could sort it out and I was content knowing he was aware of the problem and would deal with it appropriately, but he called me two more times before the lines were repainted and order was restored.

How wonderful to meet someone who has such a passion for a job which others might have found tedious!

@hivemindneeded two very cool women but agree the latter is a hero

Sandwich designer

Antarctic base manager

Sheep castrator

Japanese tea ceremony leader

Someone who works nationally and puts up all the town centre Christmas decorations on lamp posts etc. Then comes back to take them all down again.

🎄🎄🎄

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

Not someone I know personally but I have come across them doing the job for other people - horse "bean" remover.

Is that a euphemism for 'makes stallions into geldings'?!

No it isn’t…. Males get a hard lump of smegma that builds up inside their penises into like a giant baked bean that needs to be removed or it would get horribly infected 🤮 geldings get this mostly as stallions use their penis so it gets rubbed clean! Geldings often are lazy and don't unsheath their penis to urinate which contributes to developing the bean.

Embalmer, a friend of the family.