If you don't work, what are your reasons for living? What do you strive for?

[Turnitupto11]

Just that really. If you don't work and I guess don't bring up children, what do you make your purpose in life? Do you aim for something? What gives your life meaning?

I'm unable to work due to poor health. I'm currently taking a course because it interests me but I'm unsure if I can use it careerwise in the future, due to said ill health.

I'm doing very little with my life apart from that. I don't have the financial means or good health to travel. I read a lot of fiction. I guess I'm looking for something to make my life meaningful. Something to aim towards or a "raison d'etre". My mental health is poor and I thought maybe I need a goal or something.

I'm interested to hear what other people do, what you do that makes your existence worthwhile if you don't work or bring up children.

Sorry if I've phrased this badly, struggling to get across what I mean. I definitely don't want to offend anybody.

@AlexaShutUp

One of my inspirations in life is a 95 year old lady that I know. She had a very hard childhood and wasn't brought up by her parents, so she has no extended family. She lost her husband young, and her only child died from cancer as a young adult. She has been without any family for the last 40 years. I first met her when she was in her late seventies, and she spent most of her time volunteering in the community.

Her health is now declining somewhat and she needs a carer to come in and assist with the housework. She can't do all of the volunteering that she did previously, but even at 95, she remains active in helping others in her community. For example, she visits a blind man every other day to help him with basic everyday tasks. She is also very active in an organisation that supports education in a developing country. I love the fact that she maintains these interests still. She is so upbeat and cheerful, despite all the losses that she has experienced.

I knew another elderly lady when I was growing up. I remember chatting to her when she was around 80 and she had decided that it was finally time to get to grips with her phobia of maths so she was going off on some residential maths course. My mind was totally blown.

I think the key thing, OP, is not to focus on what is lacking from your life or on the things that you cannot do, but to focus on the stuff that you can do, whether it's for yourself or for other people. What do you really enjoy? What do you want to learn? How could you help someone? What one thing could you do today that would make you feel like you had done something worthwhile?

Strangely I've just done a maths course! I knew I could do it but was hopeless at exams in school.

The problem is on a good day I'll feel like I can do anything, but then the next day could be terrible and I've signed up for something I can't even contemplate doing

Just take each day as it comes, OP. You can do more on the good days and cut yourself some slack on the bad ones.

Just don't commit yourself to anything too expensive that you might not be able to follow through on!

Have you looked at the £10 a day thread on here? It is possible to make money online from home. I do matched betting and a few surveys and only mention this because I saw you did a maths course (I did GSCE maths a couple of years ago online using bbc bitesize). Therefore I love the numbers and stats doing matched betting and it earns me some tax free cash. What courses have you done? I’ve just completed a Tudor course which I really enjoyed.

@AlexaShutUp

Maybe the purpose of life doesn't lie in doing but rather in being. It isn't about what you achieve or how you spend your time, it's about who you are, how you develop to be the best version of yourself and what you mean to the people around you - whether that's family, friends or wider community etc. You don't have to do anything at all. Your life is inherently valuable.

This. So beautifully put.

@Hunsnroses

Have you looked at the £10 a day thread on here? It is possible to make money online from home. I do matched betting and a few surveys and only mention this because I saw you did a maths course (I did GSCE maths a couple of years ago online using bbc bitesize). Therefore I love the numbers and stats doing matched betting and it earns me some tax free cash. What courses have you done? I’ve just completed a Tudor course which I really enjoyed.

As I'm on benefits I'm not allowed to have any income.

My maths isn't that good!

I've been studying courses about mental health up to now. I'm also trying to improve my French on an app and geography, also with an app.

Read Sue Stuart-smith’s lovely life-affirming book ‘the well gardened mind’ and then plant some stuff and watch it grow.

I love having a little herb garden - from March to October I can go out with an empty mug at bedtime and pick myself a cuppa: lavender and mint and lemon balm.

And growing stuff really does create meaning - you’re providing for pollinators who are providing for us, which is about as essential as it gets.

For me it would be writing. I love writing and have written novels but am currently too busy with work and children and the mundane to find enough time to write. If I had no work or children I would probably try to connect to others in that format and if I got published I could leave a bit of myself in the world even after I died.

@Verbena87

Read Sue Stuart-smith’s lovely life-affirming book ‘the well gardened mind’ and then plant some stuff and watch it grow.

I love having a little herb garden - from March to October I can go out with an empty mug at bedtime and pick myself a cuppa: lavender and mint and lemon balm.

And growing stuff really does create meaning - you’re providing for pollinators who are providing for us, which is about as essential as it gets.

I'll look for the book, thanks. I do have a garden, I don't have a lot of herbs, but the bees love the fuchsias and borage I like the thought of picking my own cuppa, so I'll try and plant those.

@Tumbleweed101

For me it would be writing. I love writing and have written novels but am currently too busy with work and children and the mundane to find enough time to write. If I had no work or children I would probably try to connect to others in that format and if I got published I could leave a bit of myself in the world even after I died.

I always wanted to be a writer, but when I've tried, I just don't have a book in me. But maybe I need to let go of that and just write sh!t down!