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Original poster

My daughter just told me she thinks the alexa is listening to her and plug holes are watching her and i have no idea if im supposed to react

71 replies

Adogisonmypillow · 03/01/2022 00:35

I have an 11 year old daughter who we have been told is autistic and possibly adhd although no one really seems to know other than she behaves unusually.

We have been trying to get her a school place (all our other children are home ed) but its been months and no school will have her even though its already been to a fair access panel.

She just walked in to my bedroom and told me that she thinks the alexa is listening to her all the time and she wont speak around alexa and that she has been staring at the plugs in case they are watching her.
She said she is paranoid (her words) and said she was a 10 on the paranoid scale. Then she smiled and left.

I have no idea at all what i should do. There is 0 point in trying to talk to her about it - she just doesn’t have conversations like that but i feel like thats not a normal thing to say.

I dare not bring it up because she will latch on to it and it will become a huge deal but i dont want to ignore it and risk her developing some kind of problem!

Has anyone else had anything like this?

OP posts:
LikeALeadBalloon · 03/01/2022 00:38

That level of paranoia is worrying but is it possible she's seen this on YouTube or something? Have you noticed she avoids talking around the Alexa or has been staring at plugs?

Original poster
Adogisonmypillow · 03/01/2022 00:41

I honestly dont know. I haven’t noticed her staring at plugs or anything tbh she does wait for alexas light ti go off before talking if someone activates it but tbh i just thought she was being awkward.

OP posts:
HoppingPavlova · 03/01/2022 00:44

Paed psych consult

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

11 year olds Families
BingoLingFucker · 03/01/2022 00:46

How much access does she have to the internet?

Potatodrivers · 03/01/2022 00:47

I removed all of our alexas because I seen news articles saying that they were listening.
Maybe she has read similar and is now a bit concerned about it.

Quietly remove Alexa and see what she says when she notices it has gone, if anything. If she asks why, just explain that you knew it was making her uncomfortable so the easy solution was to remove it.

Alexa has recently told a child to put a plug part way in the socket and to touch the pins with a penny. I'll never plug mine back in lol

SallyAnn32 · 03/01/2022 00:47

From experience of working with young people who feel similar things - with varying levels of MH needs (not saying your dd has - I'm no dr) I would just ask what she would like you to do to help. Be open and chat, she will appreciate the conversion about it x

Kpo58 · 03/01/2022 00:48

TBF, the Alexa is listening in all the time or it wouldn't hear when you talk to it. There have been cases when some crimes have been solved due to recordings that Alexa has made.

The plug socket thing is concerning though.

SallyAnn32 · 03/01/2022 00:48

..and then take it from there depending on the outcome of your chat

DukeofEarlGrey · 03/01/2022 00:49

Yes, the Alexa thing is not that strange depending on what's inspired it - Alexa probably IS listening.

Original poster
Adogisonmypillow · 03/01/2022 00:51

Bingo she has an ipad but she is limited what she can access my dh is a web developer and so he is pretty good and limiting the devices!

OP posts:
Lessofallthisunpleasantness · 03/01/2022 00:52

Alexa is listening. Not sure about plug holes.....

Original poster
Adogisonmypillow · 03/01/2022 00:54

I think she meant alexa was listening in a dangerous way not in a listening out way its hard to describe her tone - but i will ask her if she wants to unplug them tomorrow.

OP posts:
hayley013 · 03/01/2022 00:57

There's tons of videos on you tube that would make up a big story such as the ones your daughters mentioning, things like what if...? The language too, rating out of 10 is common on these videos

JanglyBeads · 03/01/2022 00:58

Have a look at the OCD-UK website, that sounds a bit like intrusive thoughts. There is quite an overlap between ASD and OCD sufferers. Loads of info for parents and children on the website

LikeALeadBalloon · 03/01/2022 01:07

Very hard if you think talking about it specifically could make her latch on but if you could get her to open up generally about her feelings and see what comes up then? In an ideal world you would want to gain her trust without indulging her beliefs but that is extremely hard. Could you get her counselling?

Extreme paranoia is a symptom of many mental health conditions/disorders and I know from a family member that it is a pretty miserable and exhausting way to live. I could be projecting but I just felt like this was something my family member would say so more unhealthy paranoia than that Alexa is on standby etc

StaplesCorner · 03/01/2022 01:11

@JanglyBeads

Have a look at the OCD-UK website, that sounds a bit like intrusive thoughts. There is quite an overlap between ASD and OCD sufferers. Loads of info for parents and children on the website
I was going to say OCD, my DD18 has severe OCD and she has episodes where she might say something similar. Both OCD Uk and OCD Action have helplines probably be open next week or you can e-mail them. Is she under CAMHS or a private psych at the moment?

I also back the poster earlier who said ask her what she would like to do, i.e., is this bothering her, and then take it from there dependent on her reply. She might actually say oh no I don't really believe it or something like that?

SleepingStandingUp · 03/01/2022 01:16

In addition to all this, I think you need to try and see what she's watching. Agree the rating herself put of 10 thing sounds like something she's seen. Now it might be that it resonates and is how she feels but even so I t would be useful to know what else she's seen

Do you have a link for that @Potatodrivers?

Potatodrivers · 03/01/2022 01:18

@SleepingStandingUp

In addition to all this, I think you need to try and see what she's watching. Agree the rating herself put of 10 thing sounds like something she's seen. Now it might be that it resonates and is how she feels but even so I t would be useful to know what else she's seen

Do you have a link for that @Potatodrivers?

www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-59810383
SleepingStandingUp · 03/01/2022 01:22

Thank you

scoobydoo1971 · 03/01/2022 01:23

My daughter, similar age, has autism. Higher functioning. Behaviour and paranoia vastly improved when there was a technology cull in my household. She now thrives without sensory overload from tech devices, media and so on. She writes and draws, and plays on her scooter. Much happier child. She doesn't hear voices or see things anymore. I don't allow gaming or non-school related computer use, and she is much more relaxed. I think atypical children who are exposed to too much of the sights and sounds of modern technological life are prone to this sort of thing.

AliceMcK · 03/01/2022 01:33

Definitely check what she’s watching. There are so many weird fucked up things that kids end up watching. We have completely stopped YouTube for our 7yo after she wrote a note in school saying she wanted to die. It turned out to be something she’d been watching on YouTube about dying. Both DH and I completely missed it even though we regularly check what our DCs are watching.

I fully believe Alexa is listening, lots of people do and post about it.

When reading your post about being watched from plug holes, it made me think of a fear I have of people living in walls after a scary movie I watched when I was younger.

You definitely need a better conversation with her. Maybe ask her if you want to remove or switch Alexa off at the walls. Also suggest putting baby proof plugs in the plug holes to cover them if she is serious.

Barbarantia · 03/01/2022 01:46

My dad did this all the time: drop a grain of truth into conspiracy theories to make them credible. to make them real.

Alexa is listening but importantly no human is listening on the other side. Yet.
But this now gives credence to the plugs having sight. Especially if she's heard of the Korean craze of upskirting.

She's either being fed bollocks off the Internet or she's really clever and putting 2 and 2 together and realising the world isn't perfectly safe or predictable. And importantly she doesn't know how to handle it.

I'd second finding out what she wants you to do about it plus tell her how you find comfort or manage to exist in the real world. I think she's just looking for coping mechanisms.

Changechangychange · 03/01/2022 01:51

The Alexa is listening. Most likely nobody is listening in on your daughter specifically, but that is how the Alexa works when it’s switched on. How else would it response to voice instructions?

Can’t help with the plug hole thing.

boomboomshakalakalakaboom · 03/01/2022 01:55

@HoppingPavlova

Paed psych consult
This plus a good chat and unplug Alexa to chill her out a bit
Potatodrivers · 03/01/2022 01:55

@Barbarantia

My dad did this all the time: drop a grain of truth into conspiracy theories to make them credible. to make them real.

Alexa is listening but importantly no human is listening on the other side. Yet.
But this now gives credence to the plugs having sight. Especially if she's heard of the Korean craze of upskirting.

She's either being fed bollocks off the Internet or she's really clever and putting 2 and 2 together and realising the world isn't perfectly safe or predictable. And importantly she doesn't know how to handle it.

I'd second finding out what she wants you to do about it plus tell her how you find comfort or manage to exist in the real world. I think she's just looking for coping mechanisms.

There can be people listening. edition.cnn.com/2019/04/11/tech/amazon-alexa-listening/index.html