Please tell me other people like their spouse to wear pyjamas as well...

[Because789]

How can I be less OCD about this. I feel bad for my poor husband 🙈

I sleep in pyjamas. My husband sleeps naked. I'm sooo bothered that he doesn't wear any pyjamas or even just pants in bed. It really shouldn't be a big deal... Like I know I don't have any reason to dislike this. Why does this bother me so much?! 😱😂

I know sleeping naked is nice. I'd like to do it once in a while, but I don't get my body to myself if I do as he (lovingly) sees it as an invitation for initiating sex or to turn over and touch/grope me through the night when he's half asleep - I hate that. I don't feel the need to touch him when he's sleeping - in fact, I'm less likely to snuggle up to him when he's naked because it doesn't feel right. I also slightly over-focus the on fact that the 'below the waist' area isn't really a clean area and knowing my (hairy) husband like I do, it can be sweaty and possibly not 'totally' clean by the time bedtime rolls around 😬 Oh God I need to get a life and stop over-thinking this 🤦

His body, his choice.

Mine normally wears pj bottoms but now and again will fall asleep naked, I can't say it really bothers me. If anything it's me who can't keep my hands off his bum.

We all sleep naked, this is probably your worst nightmare!

Eww. No problem with naked sleeping but the picture painted of a hairy slightly unclean sex pest isn’t pleasant.

He shouldn't be touching you without your consent so you certainly shouldn't feel like you have to wear clothes to stop him.

Please don't use 'OCD' in this way @Because789. OCD is a condition that can have a devastating impact on people's lives. I suspect you just like things clean. This is not OCD.

I told DH if he wants to sleep naked it’s his responsibility to change bedding every few days, funnily enough he wears pants now.
I get it’s nice etc but to me it just doesn’t sit right,
I wouldn’t wear the same pj bottoms more than once so why would I not want a sheet change more regularly.

@Cannyshite

I told DH if he wants to sleep naked it’s his responsibility to change bedding every few days, funnily enough he wears pants now. I get it’s nice etc but to me it just doesn’t sit right, I wouldn’t wear the same pj bottoms more than once so why would I not want a sheet change more regularly.

I’d feel like this too.

DH used to sleep naked but now wears PJs. He gets very hot (and therefore sweaty) at night and weirdly he feels cooler wearing a thin layer of cotton than sleeping naked. I'm pleased, as whilst it was lovely falling asleep naked I always hated waking up an hour later and having to extricate myself from a clammy hug...

You've just described your husband as a sweaty, grubby sex pest.

What's good about him?

You have the right to wear what you want to bed without being groped. Tell him to stop it.

Also agree about not using OCD casually like that.

The worrying this long hidden halfway down your post is that he’s touching you without your consent when you’ve said you don’t want it. Have you told him clearly that you don’t want it? You know that’s assault, right?

Honestly, the issue sounds like you have a husband who 'can't' keep his hands off you.

Also if anyone isn't clean, a quick bedtime shower can fix that.

No, my DH doesn't wear pyjamas and I wouldn't want him to. I like to feel his warm skin against mine. We don;t wear anything in bed.
I don't understand how any adult can wear pyjamas - all that material wrapped around me and button up top etc - just why?

See both keep naked 🤷‍♀️
I love cuddling upto a naked bum

Ew. Yes I'd feel the same. Alot of people do sweat at night and men fart and it just isn't pleasant when you share a bed with someone. To do all that naked is 10x worse. DH sleeps in a separate room for various reasons and honestly I love having the bed to myself. It's ace! I think we're still together BECAUSE we sleep separately. However I understand that's not for everyone. In your position I'd have a word and explain that you don't like it, ask he wear boxers at the very least, or shower before bed, or do what PP does about him changing the bedding more often.

don't get my body to myself if I do as he (lovingly) sees it as an invitation for initiating sex or to turn over and touch/grope me through the night when he's half asleep - I hate that

Ugh.

That's dreadful. It needs to stop regardless of what you are wearing.

I almost always sleep naked. If I start off wearing clothes I will have thrown them off somehow by the time I wake up again.

Having someone touch/grope me through the night is just.not.ok. You need to have a proper conversation to ask him WFAF he thinks he is doing. It needs to stop.

We do separate duvets. Might that work for you ?

@Cannyshite

I told DH if he wants to sleep naked it’s his responsibility to change bedding every few days, funnily enough he wears pants now. I get it’s nice etc but to me it just doesn’t sit right, I wouldn’t wear the same pj bottoms more than once so why would I not want a sheet change more regularly.

You wear clean pyjamas every night? Why not just wear a clean pair of knickers at bedtime?

Yeah I would hate that too! My husband always wears at least boxers in bed, or PJ's if it's cold.

@thetinsoldier

You've just described your husband as a sweaty, grubby sex pest.

What's good about him?

You have the right to wear what you want to bed without being groped. Tell him to stop it.

Also agree about not using OCD casually like that.

This.

Honestly? I'm with you OP. Doesn't he get cold? My dh wears a vest and pyjamas to bed though!

I don’t understand the wearing of clothes in bed either. None of my partners have ever worn anything, no problem with hairy sweatiness. We aren’t dirty when we get in either. We have a warm duvet so don’t need clothes. I don’t understand how the sex aspect works, do you take everything off, have sex, then get redressed? Do you change the bedding straight after - as it must be dirty then? Wish you had done AIBU so we could get a proper vote 😆

I wouldn’t tolerate it unless he washed/changed bedding daily. As it stands we both wear pj’s and our bedding walks itself into the laundry after god knows how long.

I’m not into the whole bum washing after a loo visit thing, but part of this relies on the fact there are bodies between my bum/nether regions and my outer clothes and bedding. I’m sure oh’s cut down on skin flakes etc in bed as well - again all contributing to extending g the time between bedding wash/change. It’s easier to pop ph’s in the wash but washing and changing a bed is a right kerfuffle.

It was one of the things which gave me the ick about my ex husband. Never owned a pair of pj's, refused to wear anything to bed. Even when our children were at the age of getting into bed with us in the mornings, he still flatly refused to cover up. One memorable morning , our DD tapped me on the arm and lifted the sheets to show me Daddy's morning erection - I had to explain to a 2 year old why Daddy's penis was doing that ! Yikes !

I always found it very sexual - he was a sex pest at the best of times, and the knowledge that he was lying there naked just made me want to move far, far away.

It's one of the many reasons that he is my ex.

I can’t sleep naked, it feels awful to me. I buy cheap XXL men’s tshirts from Tesco and wear one with pants and socks to sleep in. DH also wears a tshirt, pants and socks so we both look like Winnie the Pooh when getting ready for bed

Divisive subject clearly. Mine wears pants I wouldn't like him being naked unless he had a shower before bed. Can't think of anything worse than being naked myself. I'd roll over onto my breasts and wake myself up.

@Cannyshite

I told DH if he wants to sleep naked it’s his responsibility to change bedding every few days, funnily enough he wears pants now. I get it’s nice etc but to me it just doesn’t sit right, I wouldn’t wear the same pj bottoms more than once so why would I not want a sheet change more regularly.

Agree with this