How much money did you save before trying for a baby?

[somegirlontheinter]

I know there’s no set answer, but I’m curious to know how much we realistically need to save. My SO and I are both 29, and I feel like I constantly have baby fever. We both have a decent joint income of >130k which I think means that we could afford the day to day cost of parenting but I wonder if we need to have enough saved for a few years (e.g. 5 years) of education, extra-curriculars and childcare or is it enough to just cover all the expenses of the first year + maternity leave? My SO and I cannot seem to agree on this. We are getting on a bit now, but the reality of being a mum is a bit worrying and almost frightening…(all of my disposable income will no longer be available for me to buy/do silly and pointless things, no more me-time, can’t just decide to go abroad on a whim). But the money issue is the first hurdle to figure out…

Not a penny and we were renting. You're massively over thinking it when you have that income!!

I think you’re getting some uncalled for comments here, and I think more women need to think about their finances prior to children. It’s important to plan for the long term- childcare and school fees, take into account drops in income when you’re on maternity, going PT etc. Its very very hard to pay childcare and school fees from monthly income even on huge salaries esp if you’re in the SE/London. You need to plan ahead. Get investments in place, benefit from compound interest etc. this all takes forward planning years and years before the money is required. I don’t know how old you are and when you want to have DC, but you need to financially plan for your future. Don’t just look at your current household income and think it’s high enough and you’ll be fine.

@HelloBunny

None. Sounds like you have plenty of money to me! Nothing to worry about...

Ditto this. You should have plenty of monthly money for your expenses if you're sensible.

There's no right time- you might as well do it while you've got youth on your side.

Combined my husband and I earn just over 50k - don't sweat it! You will get by and manage, it's completely worth every minute. Best of luck

None. We haven't ever been in a position where we can save money, either before or after children. It comes in it goes out ok food and bills.

@WhoAre

We saved £7k but didn't use it as I went back to work a bit earlier than expected.

You earn £130k, just actually read that number and ask yourself the affordability question again remember that some people on here raise families on income less than £18k. You sound slightly detached from reality. And you're not getting on at 29. Jesus. You must be surrounded by very wealthy people to even ask this question.

I’m not detached from reality nor am I surrounded by very wealthy people, but uh thanks for your input I guess.

Nothing. Surprise teen pregnancy with a combined household income of about 21k in 2003. We managed 🤷🏼‍♀️

I agree, you do need to think sensibly about how much raising children costs. I had my first at 30, we both worked full time and had a very affordable mortgage on a 2 bed house. Within 5 years we had 2 children in nursery, I'd dropped to 3 days a week and we'd a much bigger mortgage on a 3 bed house.
But we'd planned for it and had savings to help so it wasn't too much of a shock.
Then again, our evening out in nice restaurants didn't happen as often, so there are some savings!

If you have a good household income, why not start living on whatever your household income will be while you are on maternity leave and save the rest. That way you can both get used to the adjusted lifestyle and quickly build up some savings simultaneously.

Zero. And I was at college when I fell pregnant with DD1, still living with my parents and only working a few hours part time.

What maternity package will you get from work?

If it's just standard SMP then after a few weeks you'll be down to about £500 a month income.

You will need to ensure you can cover your fixed essential outgoings using your partners wages or savings. I assume your outgoings are high as you are on a high wage so will have upped your mortgage, car choices etc in accordance with that, so £500 a month will likely not cover it.

@Fretfulmum

I think you’re getting some uncalled for comments here, and I think more women need to think about their finances prior to children. It’s important to plan for the long term- childcare and school fees, take into account drops in income when you’re on maternity, going PT etc. Its very very hard to pay childcare and school fees from monthly income even on huge salaries esp if you’re in the SE/London. You need to plan ahead. Get investments in place, benefit from compound interest etc. this all takes forward planning years and years before the money is required. I don’t know how old you are and when you want to have DC, but you need to financially plan for your future. Don’t just look at your current household income and think it’s high enough and you’ll be fine.

Thank you for your reply, it’s super helpful. We are in London and have just managed to buy a place hence we haven’t got much at all in savings at the moment. We don’t have enough to cover an emergency fund at the moment which I believe is around 2-3 months worth of income.

I earn a lot more than my partner so we’ll have a big drop when I’m on mat leave. Childcare would take up at least 50% of our disposable. I need to budget for a salary drop if I cannot manage full time and it would be great if we had enough to cover school fees in advance, but not sure how many years worth is ideal.

Not a single penny

@somegirlontheinter as many years school fees as possible is ideal. People seem to think it’s a luxury to have fees saved up in advance. But it shouldn’t be if more people planned for their financial future. We have one DC fees saved up in our investment portfolio to take them to 21yo. None of that was saved from our income- all interest from stocks which took 14 years. We are working on the next DCs fees currently.
Sorry to be brutal but your current salaries are not high enough for London school fees, extra curriculars, holidays, days out etc to pay as you go along monthly. You need to supplemental your income using compound interest you have accrued over time to pay for the additional expenses. It also takes a lot of pressure off you knowing you have high savings. Get yourself SS ISAs and financially educate yourselves if you don’t already have these skills. Even little amounts of money will go a long way over time. Work on reducing your outgoings from now and consider DH going PT with DC if he’s a lower earner. Look at other roles you can laterally move into to improve your salary in the future

Also 29 and 30 with combined income pre tax about 80k. Fell pregnant (planned) in Oct but miscarried. Had nothing saved however wasn't particularly concerned as we jointly have about 2k disposable income between us. Also banked on the fact that husband works overseas a lot so we would have maybe saved about 7k by the time my due date would've rolled around.

It's true what pp's have said, people are often more than happy to offer hand me down bits and pieces, and I love an up cycle or a bargain so would have also been on the look out for them.

Currently thinking about trying again but again with no particular savings goal.

£0. I was still at university.

Also look at the partners shared parental leave policy, it may make more financial sense for you to take the first 3 months then for him to take the rest. It definitely sounds like it would make more sense for him to go part time than you if that becomes necessary.

In London you'll be looking at at least £100 a day for nursery so around £2000 a month

I didn't know this was a thing.
I've just been winging it

You have far more money than most! What you need to do is seriously talk about money and lifestyle - too many posters here have Dp's who don't contribute to the household pot to cover the woman's maternity leave. Your lifestyle will take a hit with a kid, saving a few months salary helps a lot when your income drops

I saved enough to cover 7 months of mortgage payments as I knew I would only get stat maternity pay which would only cover about 25% of my outgoings. I also knew that I could just about cover childcare costs out of my 'disposal' income when I returned to work.
havent worked out how to pay for the second (theoretical) one yet but I really am getting on (38) so just going to wing it!

Haven't actually saved any money
17 weeks pregnant

We ploughed it all into;
Getting married (because I wanted the legal protection that brings, I'm the lower earner & would like to reduce to 4 days/week once baby is here)
Buying a house & making some essential improvements (new roof, boiler, windows etc)
Upgraded car from ancient 3 door to a newer 5 door

I also moved from a charity employer to a public sector employer with better maternity pay & family friendly policies before TTC, meaning I should be able to go to 4 days/week.

[quote Fretfulmum]@somegirlontheinter as many years school fees as possible is ideal. People seem to think it’s a luxury to have fees saved up in advance. But it shouldn’t be if more people planned for their financial future. We have one DC fees saved up in our investment portfolio to take them to 21yo. None of that was saved from our income- all interest from stocks which took 14 years. We are working on the next DCs fees currently.
Sorry to be brutal but your current salaries are not high enough for London school fees, extra curriculars, holidays, days out etc to pay as you go along monthly. You need to supplemental your income using compound interest you have accrued over time to pay for the additional expenses. It also takes a lot of pressure off you knowing you have high savings. Get yourself SS ISAs and financially educate yourselves if you don’t already have these skills. Even little amounts of money will go a long way over time. Work on reducing your outgoings from now and consider DH going PT with DC if he’s a lower earner. Look at other roles you can laterally move into to improve your salary in the future[/quote]
Thank you so much for being so helpful!!

Nothing.