My life is not your life

[Builtthiscityonsausagerolls]

I'm single and child free. Both by choice.
Part of that choice is a lifestyle that is maybe quite self indulgent. But a few things have peed me off this week:

1. Friend is at mine having a drink. Asks me to go with her to a (family) event. I say: 'not sure I can afford it'. She gestures to a perfume I've just bought and says 'I'd believe you if I hadn't seen this haha'
2. sibling is going through a rough patch. I say 'come round for lunch and we'll talk it through' sibling says they will turn up at 8 on Sunday morning after picking kids up from sleep over. I say I won't be up at 8 - sibling 'will wake you up then lazy haha' - I'm out Saturday and don't expect to get in till 2ish
3. A small comment but rankles. Collegue on Monday 'I can't belive you have a cleaner. In the time it takes me to get the kids ready you could clean up after yourself

I know all 3 examples are a bit me being winey, but I chose this life because I don't like domestic chores and don't want children! Yet it seems to mean that my choosing life style is second to everyone else's.

Want to sleep in - ill wake you. Buy perfume instead of coming to my kids Christmas thing- your prioritis are wrong. Spend money on a cleaner - you are single you have nothing better to do!

I'm a bit but it's seemingly incessant at the moment.

You sound like you have a lovely life! Women can't have it all and I think it's great that so many women are actively pursuing lives that bring them purpose and joy.

Enjoy your lie ins op!! I remember my older sister used to make me feel bad pre kids as i slept so much! I am so so so glad I did asI went on to hqve 3 kids who didnt sleep for years and years.. At 37 my dcs are older im back to sleeping loads again and ny dh swap lie ins and go runnings and go away on our own etc ( we have no family support so hve to swap over)

And I still have had comments about how much time we seem to have. In fact we dont but v much give each other a break after years of burn out and sleep deprivation. Its just begrudery op

I sat in bed until 11 yesterday. Because I felt like it.

You need to start responding differently.

Family event - I'm already busy that day.

Sibling - Come over at 1pm as I need to do a few things first thing (i.e. sleep but they don't need to know that).

Cleaner - Don't even mention that one!

@Malteser71

Completely agree, Cheeky fuckers, jealous too.

Curious that you’d spend time on a parenting website though.

🙄 not this old chestnut again.

You do realise, don’t you, that the vast majority of topics and threads here have precisely nothing to do with parenting?

Start telling the truth about why you don't want to go somewhere, e.g. it's not my thing, I'm not interested etc.

I fell out with a friend partly because she would constantly tell me she was too skint to go out, then I'd find out she'd been out with other people instead. It was the lying that was the problem.

And as a pp said, "I can't spend that money at the moment" isn't quite the same thing as "I can't afford it".