ADHD - anyone got any hints and tips for coping with life

[Gingernaut]

I have a magic marker in the kitchen, which I use to write the use by or best before dates on jars and packages

I use clear containers and jars so I can see what's in them and what state they're in

I don't have one cupboard for all the cleaning gear. I keep things I use to clean, close to where I use them - bathroom and toilet cleaners in the bathroom, laundry detergents close to the washing machine and shoe care stuff close to my shoes.

I have magnetic boards, lots of magnets and clips and even have magnetic sheets which I can cut and stick to items so that they can go on the boards - phone, frequently used screwdrivers and pen pots are all stuck up on IKEA metal boards

I keep a letter opener handy so that when mail come in, it's opened straight away. I decide whether it needs to be filed or whether something needs to be done and clip it up, ready to be dealt with.

I have lots of mirrors and dry wipe pens - If I need to remember something, I write it on one or more mirrors, so that when I look in the mirror, I'll see the note.

If I need to remember to post a letter or bring something out with me, I place it on the floor, in front of a door I have to pass through to leave the house.

I have magnetic note pads stuck about the place, so that I can write notes to myself wherever I am.

II have a whiteboard in my bedroom - the first and last thing I see when I wake up is what I've written on the board.

New job uses Microsoft Teams - I have my shifts to hand whenever I open the app.

Anyone got anything else?

Apps? Practices?

Nothing? No one? Really?

You are way ahead of me!!!

Everything has its place where it lives.

I also have a DH that is a minimalist yet tolerate of my mess and helps me keep "stuff" under control. That really helps but you can't have him.

Medication . But also doing stuff the night before as much as possible, especially for toddler DS.

I also "pay the ADHD" tax a lot, so buy as much pre-prepared stuff as possible. Mainly thins like pre-cut fruit and veg, but also whole roast chicken and pre-marinated meat. Otherwise the food prep gets overwhelming.

I have one hardback notebook for everything. If i go to a meeting, class or any appointment any notes or just the date i need to go back goes in the notebook. I use a highlight to mark the first page of any notes - so the page will have note from hospital appt with highlighted title and I don’t have to look for where the next thing starts, just flip to the next highlight.

I buy a brand new notebook every year, in a different colour, even if the old one isn’t finished.

You do all the little things I do. I kept losing my kitchen marker, so I wrapped velcro around the lid and put the other bit on the fridge. It lives there now and it's easy to distinguish 'fridge sharpie' since it's the only one in the house with velcro on it. I use a roll of masking tape to label things (very handy for plugs!) and I use Alexa to work out use by dates so I'll ask 'What's the date six weeks from today?' and then write it immediately.

For apps, I use a bullet journal one. I'll attach an image because there's a few different ones. I love the idea of a bullet journal but inevitably I'd lose my paper one, or forget it exists. I'm always on my phone so it made sense to try, and it's made a huge difference.

Oh, and my Instant Pot changed my life, once I got brave enough to take it out of the box.

Also, if I’m doing something but need to stop at a set time to get to an appt or catch a train, I set an alarm on my phone for a few mins before. The alarm app I have makes you press three buttons to stop it and the volume increases until you dl.

I would say you are doing pretty well OP, you’ve got systems in place to keep you focused and organised.
I am no way near organised. Just try to note things in my notebook straightaway, add appointments to the calendar straightaway. Take a picture of important letters and send to my husband.

That’s really organised Op, significantly more so than lots of people without ADHD. Everyone forgets things so don’t worry too much.

Keeping the stuff where you use it is a great one. I bought a second set of bathroom cleaning stuff and stashed it upstairs which makes it so much easier to get started on the bathroom up there.

I have a vibrate alarm set on my Fitbit type watch for ten mins before I need to go to work. Then one for the time I need to leave the house. Has helped me focus on getting out the door without faffing

I write everything down. In fact I think I'm going to go back to a paper diary as I found a phone based calendar doesn't look right to me and nothing leaps out at me.

I photograph letters for the school kids, or clubs messages.

I'm awaiting an assessment.

@Sunnysidegold how did you go about getting an assessment? I've been reading about adult adhd and it's like a revelation!

Speaking for my young adult DD, definitely medication.

She would be lost - literally - without it.

Setting timers for short periods.
I went round the house spending 4 minutes tidying each room with a 40s rest to change room. It's enough to make a difference and not get into that overwhelmed, loss of interest when you can't focus any more

Well, this is depressing.

Yup to meds.

Yup to timers, both digital and an app that counts down.

Will have a go at a bullet journal, but it seems very complicated for a glorified to do list.

Shoe holder tidy things hung over door with face masks, tissues, money etc in for when I leave the house.
Hate to say it but Amazon Subscribe really helps for making sure i have the essentials in.
INTTT allows me to connect my Alexa shopping list to my Tesco basket
Alexa reminders
To be honest Amazon is my best friend.
An app called Tiny Decisions which helps me choose when I am going round in circles
Podcasts to help me get things done around the house
Trying to keep Sunday as a get things done day
Setting 1pm to 3pm aside for 'should-free' time when my brain can do what it wants
Caffeine
Walks in nature
Stitch Fix for buying clothes
Monzo account to organise finances - automate as much of my finances as possible

If I had to choose one thing it would be Alexa in every room. It means you can ask questions without getting distracted, add to lists, set timers, even read your emails

An app called Obedience where you get points for doing habits. It is designed as an S&M app with one person a dom and the other a sub but it's a great accountability tool. You build up points and get rewards.

I don't have ADHD but problems with my working memory. Your list is great @Gingernaut and I'm stealing some others too like the Velcro pen!

One of the best things I have done is get an Echo Dot so when my hands are full but a thought comes into my mind which will slide right out again without being written down I just ask Alexa to remind me (for example if I am cooking and realise we need butter...if I stop cooking to write that down, I'll forget about the cooking and burn it. If I don't stop cooking I will forget about the butter!)

So I add everything to Alexa and then check the reminders in the app. It's literally been life changing. I did learn the hard way to be explicit with my reminders, I have one on my phone that says "chair" and have no clue what it means!

I take a photo of everything like hospital appointment letters/bills that come in the post/email and save them to different albums on my phone. If I need to tell DH or the DCs something, I text them as well, more as a reminder for me than for them!

My phone is amazing, like an efficient PA. At the beginning and end of every day, I sit with a cup of tea and go through the days reminders/texts/photos/emails and make sure things are on the shopping list/calendar/paid in the bank app/on the To Do list etc.

On the note above we have also had to change from gas cooker to electric so it's less risky. I have post it notes up above cooker/on kitchen door etc reminding me to turn stuff off. My neurologist gave me the tip to move the notes' positions every few days so they are "new" for my brain to notice them, not just part of the scenery. My biggest issue is actually the loss of independence and reliance on others.

Actually another big issue is sometimes I can't remember my correct SPaG and absolutely hate MN twats pedants that correct me, I stopped using MN for a while after a particularly horrible poster mocked me. Slightly off topic but just in case anyone else has suffered with a similar thing!

Ooh cross posted with others! Maybe I'm not the only one who read this last night and "watched" it to remind me to come back and post this morning!

Can I add the bookmark/watch/TIO function on MN as being invaluable (I also like the new quote facility too)

Also @tellmetologoffIamaMNaddict I am so thrilled to see someone else who does multiple posts in a "oh I should have said that too" way - it's not just me!

I’m currently in chaos, can’t seem to get to the pharmacy to get my meds so I’ve given up on them. Tile app was really helpful until the batteries ran out, not managed to replace them for a year.

I allow myself a lot of downtime to plan and organise, i only work 3 days a week, I’m doing a part time MSc as well. I have an amazing husband.

Meal planning is something I find essential. Once a week plan all the meals, write them down and do a big shop.

@WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles

Also *@tellmetologoffIamaMNaddict* I am so thrilled to see someone else who does multiple posts in a "oh I should have said that too" way - it's not just me!

Haha. I felt embarrassed about it but then thought, "sod it, it's an ADHD thread". Love being with my tribe!

I don't 'offically' have ADHD but I am not NT and I have huge problems with executive function. I also find that if I can't see things then they don't exist. I have a cupboard where my handbag is supposed to live - I opened it the other day and found all sorts of exciting things I had forgotten about!
I keep the bathroom cleaning supplies in the bathrooms because then I can clean a bit of the bathroom if I'm in there and the impulse takes me!
I meal plan and have the meal plan and shopping list on the kitchen door so I see it all the time.
I tried having a list of what was in the freezer but I never updated it because whenever I took stuff out of the freezer I was in the middle of meal prep and by the time I had time I had forgotten.
I tried using a bullet journal but got really stressed that I was 'doing it wrong' because mine never looked pretty. I did then go over to just writing a 'to do' list but if I don't open the book I don't see it - maybe I just need to leave it open?
I have a plastic wallet stuck to the end of our shoe cupboard thing and all school letters go in there - I walk past it many times and see the letters which triggers my brain to do something with them.
Timers are my friend - if I come home from work at lunchtime to prep the evening meal then I set a very loud mechanical kitchen timer to remind me to go back! I also use them if I need to to a task but will get overwhelmed - I clean in 30 minute blocks which I can just about cope with!
When I need to do something I tell myself that when I have counted to 100 I will get up and do that thing.
At work (am a TA so part of my day is directed and part I am doing interventions) I have a notebook where my class teacher writes down jobs I need to do at the start of the day - this lives in my 'zone' where my pens etc are and is the first thing I look at when I go in the classroom. I have a rough timetable of my interventions that lives in the folder so as soon as I open it I see what I 'should' be doing.
I do find routine helps - its like auto pilot sometimes.
I'm better in the morning - once I've done a day at work my spoons are gone and I become a wibbling mess with no energy or motivation

I've just decided that my to do notebook needs to live in the kitchen by the microwave and it needs to stay open.

I've taken some great ideas from here so thank you OP

Only have one handbag, full of all the shite you normally lose on a daily basis. Also makes you look super-organised when you always have tissues, paracetamol, spare pen etc at work.

Just don't go clubbing with it as you'll have to explain why you have a bottle of lighter fluid, a sharpie, some string and a pair of pliers in your bag.