If MN were in government, what do you think policies would be?

[BobbieT1999]

Just that really...what do you think the country would look like if MNetters ran it?

[ErrolTheDragon]

The MN government and civil service will at least, unlike the current administration, include plenty of qualified scientists. There would however need to be a ban on posters who think 'research' means 'reading and partially understanding random shit off the Internet'.

[LynetteScavo]

No body will ever be allowed to reference anything without providing concrete proof that it happened.

"Jim up the road doesn't like dogs" won't be acceptable without providing either video of Jim saying he doesn't like dogs or getting a written statement from him.

Your casual observation of Jim flinching every time he sees a dog will not be sufficient.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

@ErrolTheDragon

I don't know, but I expect they could manage a coherent speech featuring Peppa Pig.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

@KurtWildesChristmasNamechange

No men allowed anywhere ever for any reason.

Anyone lower than middle class to be sterilised.

Single parents to be sterilised.

Anyone on benefits/overweight to be euthanised.

Trans people to be put on reservations.

Children will be banned from having any screen time ever. Also no sugar ever and no fun unless it's educational.

Free gin for life for anyone on a 6 figure income.

Women like me (who oppose all the above) to be thrown to the lions.

Gin??

How crass.

[FindingMeno]

Whether you should stay with your husband will be subject to public anonymous vote.

Anyone who refers to a noo noo/ minnie/ front bottom instead of vulva/ vagina will be sent on a womens biology awareness course.

It will be compulsory to inform the school of anything and everything, even if a friend of a friend of your cousin thinks that so and so's mum might be leaving her 16 year old for 5 minutes to put the bins out.

[VeganCheesePlease]

Any woman who ever stands up for or agrees with a man has to walk around with 'cool girl' tattooed on her forehead.

[HotPenguin]

All tradesmen to be fitted with colostomy bags.

Government approved list of baby names to include Ballonz.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

Leave any relationship when you are unhappy of abused.

Put your children first. They didn't ask for or deserve any messy adult relationships you have created.

Work hard, play hard. If you have tried really hard and fall or are knocked down, good friends will catch you.

If you make no effort with your life then moan about it constantly then people have little sympathy.

Mumsnet has some weird corners but I've made fantastic friends here and the common sense of most posters hugely outweighs all of the strangeness/ trolls/ nutters as they are easy to slog.. It is a very good place with many intelligent posters and I am SO glad that I found it.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

@HotPenguin

All tradesmen to be fitted with colostomy bags.

Government approved list of baby names to include Ballonz.

Huh?

Been drinking tonight?

[ErrolTheDragon]

Yeah, it's Balonz. Don't start with the 'unique' spellings.

[AdaColeman]

Ballonz with that double LL spelling is trying too hard.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

It wasn't the "Ballonz" that confused me, it was the "tradesmen and colstomy bags"!!

[BobbieT1999]

Balonz is definitely what's confusing me!!

The colostomy thing i think is because they don't want them using the loo!!

[IWasHotInTheNineties]

For a snack you must eat naice ham and Pom Bears.

[makelovenotpetrol]

MN itself though would do absolutely nothing, and definitely no actual moderating of their own states policies or rules. They would gleefully allow all trolls and would continue to start their own threads provoking the people into public unrest and outrage.

[littlemissmagic]

Shoes off in all houses

[WhatsMyNameGonnaBeNow]

All economic concerns would be fixed by cancelling Netflix.

Little boys would be required by law to wear sparkly fairy princess dresses. Little girls would be banned from wearing such clothing.

Anyone spending more than £20 on their child at Christmas would be sent on a parenting course to learn what’s really important.

All mince dishes would be 50% lentils. It would be illegal to notice any difference.

[peboh]

As soon as your DH asks you to do something for him, LTB.

[WayneKorr]

If you are not using your driveway/garden for a few minutes your neighbour and their friends can use it at will because its a kind thing to do
When you pass on your old childrens clothes to someone who needs them , you MUST ask for them back 35 years later because you need them for your grandchildren and they should have known this
You must absolutely never be nice and do things for your partner because you will be a doormat forever

[Ellmau]

Child maintenance payments to be enforced, and men deliberately giving up a good job to avoid paying to be treated as deliberate deprivation of assets (well, income). Also to continue until any DC have finished uni.

[Ronacorona]

All private car parking spaces/areas are clearly marked.

[ThousandsOfTulips]

@Ronacorona

All private car parking spaces/areas are clearly marked.

With penguin bollards! 🐧