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Original poster

Tonight I waited an hour for an ambulance

114 replies

bloodywhitecat · 21/11/2021 00:15

My lovely husband who has fought through so much in the last 18 months had a stroke. He can't speak. He has lost the use of his right hand side. He already has terminal cancer. I am scared this stroke isn't a stroke but is a brain met. Two weeks ago he was investigated for a DVT as his D-dimer was raised and he had calf pain. I am so scared and I am so angry at how he has been failed time and time again since he was first taken ill last spring. There is no point to this post. I just wanted to let it out somewhere.

OP posts:
Knownbyanothername · 22/11/2021 14:46

One member of my family was told at least an hour’s wait for an ambulance while suffering chest pains. His wife took him in the car as they couldn’t wait any longer . Blood clots on his lungs. 🙁 He’s ok thankfully.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 22/11/2021 14:48

@bloodywhitecat what a diabolical situation all round.
Are you able to visit him and get an update that way?

Knownbyanothername · 22/11/2021 14:50

Posted too soon- sorry to hear about your DH, OP. You could try phoning the main switchboard of the hospital and ask to be put through that way, if no reply still, maybe explain the situation and ask the visiting policy for someone in your situation.

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Malibuismysecrethome · 22/11/2021 14:51

Mumdiva99 they may not get involved with politics, I don’t, but we pay our taxes and indirect taxation, and are entitled to an NHS that looks after and cares for sick people, especially terminally ill ones.

Op I’m sorry this has happened and incensed that your husband had a fall on top of everything else. Were the sides up on the bed, bless him.

Mumdiva99 · 22/11/2021 14:51

How worrying for you. I hope you get an update soon.

Mischance · 22/11/2021 14:58

Do you have a hospice nearby? - they are able to provide expert palliative care in a gentler setting than a busy NHS ward. You will be able to be with him in peace, and communication is usually better and easier.

I speak from experience with my OH.

I am very sorry to hear of the sad circumstances in which you find yourself. Flowers

Mummyoply · 22/11/2021 15:05

Does the hospital he is in have a Macmillan Information and Support Centre? If they do, call them and they will contact the ward for you Thanks

Malibuismysecrethome · 22/11/2021 15:06

Please contact PALS they can ring the ward and call you back. I have always found them really helpful.

PussyCatEatingPigsInBlankets · 22/11/2021 15:13

@Malibuismysecrethome

Please contact PALS they can ring the ward and call you back. I have always found them really helpful.
^This I was just going to suggest PALS. I'm sure they'll help.
Thewiseoneincognito · 22/11/2021 15:14

OP so sorry to read this, do look after yourself though. That was the best piece of advice I was given as I watched my DM slowly succumb to brain mets and Ovarian.

It’s when you realise ‘hell on earth’ actually exists. Hope you get answers soon.

updownandaroundd · 22/11/2021 15:14

I'm so sorry
Ive just posted my own thread and this is a bit of a reality check
I hope your husband gets better soon

Original poster
bloodywhitecat · 22/11/2021 15:23

I need to moan on MN more often, I have just managed to speak to the doctor who apologised for not calling me to update. He can now eat and drink, still no speech at all but it is an upward step. The scan shows the stroke now on the left side of his brain and they are doing an echo of his heart to check it is working as well as it should.

OP posts:
Silvercatowner · 22/11/2021 15:24

OP is there a chaplaincy service at the hospital? I was in a similar position with an elderly relative a couple of months ago - couldn't get through to the ward at all. A person from the chaplaincy visited and was great. It's non-denominational if you want it to be.

PussyCatEatingPigsInBlankets · 22/11/2021 15:30

Moan as much as you want!
That's good, that he's eating. Hopefully you'll get further positive news from the doc later/tomorrow.

OnyxOryx · 22/11/2021 15:30

they may not get involved with politics, I don’t, but we pay our taxes and indirect taxation, and are entitled to an NHS that looks after and cares for sick people, especially terminally ill ones.

You seem to be missing the point. You're not entitled to anything unless the government says you are. If you want something from the government then you need to form some sort of opinion on who to vote for. This is why not being involved/interested in politics, yet still wanting/expecting stuff from the government, doesn't work.

Fingers crossed for your DH OP.

Hoolahupsaresquare · 22/11/2021 15:40

We had a situation the other week with a 5 hour wait for a family member which had us Googling to see if we could pay for a private emergency ambulance.

It wasn’t as time critical as a stroke but he was in significant pain that required morphine.

Hoolahupsaresquare · 22/11/2021 15:41

I think I’ve posted on your threads under another name(s) therefore it occurred to me you won’t remember me but I too lost someone to pancreatic cancer. I’m wishing you and your husband many more happier days in the near future.

RB68 · 22/11/2021 16:00

The reason for the ambulance waits are as ambulances are tied up as no room at the inn to get people into hospital so even if you go privately and arrive at hospital you are still in a queue that is the same queue, at least on the ambulance there are two trained paramedics. Not recent but we had a 10 hr wait for an ambulance following stroke and fall (and broken back) a 9 hr in ambulance wait and other unacceptable wait times in the hospital for scans and xrays supposedly booked in but really a turn up and wait situation. Bed blocking is the key issue here because there are not the facilities for elderly sick folks outside of the hospital when all they need is really end of life medical care

MintMatchmaker · 22/11/2021 16:21

I'm so sorry to read this, you and your husband have been through so much Flowers

countrygirl99 · 22/11/2021 16:23

@RB68 so true about the bed blocking. My dad was in hospital for just over 3 weeks in September. He was ready to be discharged to a temp bed in a care home after 10 days but it took longer to find one than he actually needed to be in hospital for. Then he came home with a 4 week care to assess package that we now need to change to a permanent arrangement but can't find an agency to pick it up from.the current agency who are meant to only deal with discharges. So someone else will still be stuck in hospital or a temp care home placement.

DebbieBustamove · 22/11/2021 16:24

So sorry to hear this op - my father recently had a stroke during a critical incident at the only county hospital - he waited 2.5 hours for the paramedics and then spent 16 hours in the ambulance outside the hospital itself. People were dying in ambulances around him. It was very traumatic Once admitted however the stroke team were amazing and everything happened very efficiently. I do hope your husband is now getting the care he needs, it is so frightening how the NHS has been butchered by this fucking government.

BeyondShrinks · 22/11/2021 16:31

My grandad was in church a few weeks back and keeled over, there was a nurse in the congregation who couldn't find a pulse or any resps. They rang 999 and there was a four hour wait for an ambulance. Luckily the nurse was able to give CPR along enough that she found pulse and got him breathing again. And also luckily, my mum had my spare wheelchair in the boot of her car. So they were able to get him into my chair, into the car, and to A&E.

Three weeks later and he's back in with the same issue. He did manage to get an ambulance this time.

BeyondShrinks · 22/11/2021 16:32

God I'm so sorry, I was so busy being annoyed then that I forgot to wish your husband well. Flowers

FlowerArranger · 22/11/2021 16:38

There are two issues here

  • the dire state of the NHS in general and emergency services in particular;
  • the difficulty of deciding about what's best for your DH.

I'm not going to comment on #1, but I am a long time compaigner for the NHS.

@bloodywhitecat - I know you want the best for him, and you cannot bear the thought of losing him. But might it not be worth considering palliative care at this point and let nature take its course?

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but I'm just wondering about his likely quality of life if he does recover from the stroke Flowers

RB68 · 22/11/2021 16:49

@countrygirl99 are you in touch with social services and have they passed the care needs to the council - they then have a list of agencies they use. It is really poor and so many gaps and holes for people to fall through. He will need an at home assessment by the new folks. Also if you speak to the GP (with his permission) you can ask them who co-ordinates this kind of care - its often the District Nursing team and people don't often understand that either and they can co-ordinate between a whole range of folk for assessments that need to take place or kit and equipment that needs delivering etc. I dealt with a London based elderly relative and also one in Wales so have a bit of a feel for what goes on. Its really important to understand who does what and who is responsible for co-ordinating things so you know where to apply pressure and what key words are for making things happen...

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