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What to do about the dogs?

67 replies

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 17:45

Please be gentle with me.

Earlier this year we temporarily took on 2 dogs for a friend. I've named changed as this outing.

Dogs belonged to friends mum&dad. Friend has had a very, very bad time of it the last few years - still birth, multiple late term miscarriages, loss of her brother in an RTA, sister emigrated, dad diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, mum died of a sudden brain haemorrhage and shortly after her dad was taken to hospital and died of his cancer. In between all this she had 2 living children as well, currently 8 months and 2.5. You couldn't make it up, so much shit happening to one lovely person.

When her mum died, her dad couldn't manage the dogs and my friend took them in until a new home could be found. After her dad died she had a breakdown and her husband couldn't manage her support, two kids, a FT job and 2 dogs. We agreed to temporarily look after the dogs. They've been with us 6months. Both my friend, her husband and myself have tried to find them alternative homes. They're very bonded (mum and pup) and need a home together which is making it harder. We've been turned down by breed specific rescues (1 agreed to try and find a home whilst we 'fostered' but nothing has come of it), dogs trust and local charities. Mainly because they're trying to force our hand to keep them. RSPCA have said we can surrender when they aren't full but as mum dog has a health condition (manageable with medication) she'll likely be euthanised unless they re-home her or find a no kill shelter within 2 weeks. Local vets have also been approached but nothing has come of it.

We need to re-home them/ move them from our house. DH doesn't want a dog. Has never wanted a dog. I like dogs and would probably keep them if he were on board but I work FT out of the home, DH WFH so most care really falls to him. We also have 2 kids, 2&4. Plus extra cleaning they create and the money. We can't afford doggy day care or a dog walker for the two (well maybe we could, but don't want to, it isn't a priority for us and we're far from rich do it would be at the expense of other things). Thankfully the insurers have been amazing and transferred the existing insurance to us otherwise we'd be paying in full for the medication, but I don't think they'd transfer it again.

Friend and husband have said they absolutely won't have them back, even if that means they're euthanised - they just can't cope (fair enough). They've asked friends, relatives and neighbors, as have we.

The rehoming shelters are all basically saying they are full with lockdown puppies and puppy farm breeding dogs and cannot take more dogs right now.

Does anyone have any suggestions? My next port of call is to sell them but I'm just so so wary of that as you hear the horror stories of bait dogs etc. But is selling them better than having them PTS?

Please help, any suggestions? Not a begging thread and PMs requesting details will be ignored.

OP posts:
Chichichiwawa · 14/11/2021 17:50

Pts is by far not the worst thing that can happen to an unwanted dog. I think it should be a very serious consideration. You've tried to do the right thing and rehome them, and you can't. Selling them is a really bad idea. They could end up anywhere. At least if they're pts, then you and friend will know there's no chance of the dogs being separated or mistreated in the future. It's sad, but it's a certain end.

MrsWooster · 14/11/2021 17:53

Have you tried Blue Cross rehome-from-home service?

wetotter · 14/11/2021 17:54

You're doing a really good thing with these dogs

All I can think of is to keep contacting more rescues - not just breed specific.

One that might be worth calling is www.manytearsrescue.org/FAQ.php

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Bellie99 · 14/11/2021 17:56

Where in the country are you? Between us we may know smaller local centres that could help?

Summersnake · 14/11/2021 17:58

Reading the comment above mine
My dog was very ill ,and the vet refused to put him him down ,when I was begging him to ,vet wanted to keep trying,when to me it was clear he was in pain and needed to be let go.
Not sure how easy it will be to get a vet to put them both down ,just because no other home .
Your friend should take them back ,she’s not really a friend though is she ,to leave you in this situation
Yes she has had a shit time ,but the dogs are here responsibly not yours .she should take them back and sort it out herself

Pumpkinsonparade · 14/11/2021 17:58

I took on a relatives ddog a few years ago. A kind mner got him a place in Jerry Green's at Thirsk.. Sadly he was imo badly rehomed and ended up pts.
Rehoming yourself via unknown routes won't end well - ime.
Better you take the dm yourself to be pts - so she is with someone she knows.
The dd could have a great future if she is rehomed by' professionals '.
What an awful pickle op
.

Summersnake · 14/11/2021 17:58

Top comment ,other comments appeared as I was typing

heathspeedwell · 14/11/2021 18:00

If your friend is in agreement, could you contact the local paper and see if they can be re-homed that way? It's such a sad story that I think the paper and local people may well want to do their best to help.

AwkwardPaws27 · 14/11/2021 18:01

Have you tried smaller rescues like All Animals Rescue (on Facebook) or Pro Dogs Direct?

Agree with above comments that euthanasia is a kinder choice for an older dog with longterm health issues than selling them on, where they could well be passed from home to home & not receive the correct medical care.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:02

We've tried several rescues, not just breed specific, including blue cross but not many tears, I'll give them a try thanks.

They need to go before Christmas. When we took them on we had absolutely no idea they'd still be here mid November!

We're north midlands.

OP posts:
longtompot · 14/11/2021 18:02

Are they a specific breed? There are lots of breed specific rehomimg charities that might be able to help.

Your poor friend though. That's so much for one person to have to deal with in one life let alone in a few months Flowers

Okki · 14/11/2021 18:03

Try Yappy Ever After Dog Rescue. They're based in the Derby area and take on all sorts needing rescue. They're brilliant.

Pumpkinsonparade · 14/11/2021 18:04

I was contacted via someone when I tried rehoming ddog to remind me people buy ddogs off some sites for ddog baiting... Please don't advertise the ddogs..

Daisy4569 · 14/11/2021 18:05

Definitely look at smaller rescues. Also if you’re on Facebook try joining any local groups specific to the breed(s) they quite often have people willing to foster or to take in another one or two if the only other option is pts.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:06

@Summersnake

Reading the comment above mine My dog was very ill ,and the vet refused to put him him down ,when I was begging him to ,vet wanted to keep trying,when to me it was clear he was in pain and needed to be let go. Not sure how easy it will be to get a vet to put them both down ,just because no other home . Your friend should take them back ,she’s not really a friend though is she ,to leave you in this situation Yes she has had a shit time ,but the dogs are here responsibly not yours .she should take them back and sort it out herself
She's a really good friend. And she feels awful about it but she's really really unwell and absolutely cannot have them back. If she had cancer would you be saying the same thing?
OP posts:
ThesecondLEM · 14/11/2021 18:06

Thank you for stepping in and helping these dogs. It's a big deal and not one to be taken lightly so no criticism from me (vet nurse) for you finding it too much.

One suggestion, given the background, might be the cinammon trust. I do think you kind of have to pre register but it's worth a try. It's a charity that aids people with terminal or age related illness if their pets need rehoming.

I have to agree that PTS isn't always a terrible option and would certainly be favourable to further disruption if a forever home cannot be found and the anxiety caused if the Dogs are separated after already losing their family.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:08

Yes, I've joined FB groups but only had individuals offer to take them which I'm just really wary of.

I'll try all rescues mentioned that we have already. Thanks.

OP posts:
Words · 14/11/2021 18:09

Try Cinnamon Trust OP. They may well be able to help, particularly given the circumstances.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:10

Friend tried the cinnamon trust before she (and we) took them but worth another go I guess.

OP posts:
Halloweenadoodle · 14/11/2021 18:15

Animals in need in Wellingborough. They are a no kill shelter.

caringcarer · 14/11/2021 18:17

If a family offers to home one dog but can't take two, surely that will make life easier for you until second fog can be re-homed. If a personal offers to take dog, check them out. Do they have any other dogs? Not huge fierce ones but family pets? If so I would give them a go. Even if older sick dog has to be pts it seems unfair on the young and fit dog. Dogs adapt, why can't they be separated?

mangocoveredlamb · 14/11/2021 18:17

Could you and the individuals who’ve offered to take them approach a “full” rescue and see if they would do the due diligence on the potential new home?

ThesecondLEM · 14/11/2021 18:18

It does look like PTS may be the only option. Not what you would choose but favourable to the alternatives. Please avoid gumtree and pets4homes at all cost.

If it is in the dogs best interests and homes cannot be found then a vet absolutely will euthanize if there are no options. It may be worth contacting local practices as its not unheard of for animals to be presented for PTS and practices to get them signed over for rehoming. They will only do so if they can garuntee an appropriate home or rescue so its a rare occurance but does happen. Obviously two dogs is more difficult

Nearthelooplease · 14/11/2021 18:21

She's a really good friend. And she feels awful about it but she's really really unwell and absolutely cannot have them back. If she had cancer would you be saying the same thing?

You sound absolutely lovely but I’m afraid I agree with the poster you were replying to. Yes, if your friend had cancer I would expect her to take back the dogs that you agreed to temporarily look after 6 months after you agreed to look after them. They should at the very least be paying for the dogs that they have effectively dumped on you.

Are you feel comfortable sharing the breed? Perhaps someone will be able to suggest a rescue that will be able to help.

Please don’t sell the older dog with the health conditions. Nobody is going to buy her as a pet (it might be hard enough to get her rehomed through a rescue) but she might end up being used for dog fighting or breeding if she’s not been spayed.

Gwrach · 14/11/2021 18:25

I know in our area people have been surrendering their dog to the dog warden by saying "they have found them straying" and they just leave them with the dog warden. Lots of lock down puppies.

I have to be honest I think after 7 days they are PTS, even though they say "they move them on after 7 days to be re-homed out of area if possible" but I'd say they PTS.

I suppose this is what it has come to with rescues full.

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