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What to do about the dogs?

67 replies

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 17:45

Please be gentle with me.

Earlier this year we temporarily took on 2 dogs for a friend. I've named changed as this outing.

Dogs belonged to friends mum&dad. Friend has had a very, very bad time of it the last few years - still birth, multiple late term miscarriages, loss of her brother in an RTA, sister emigrated, dad diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, mum died of a sudden brain haemorrhage and shortly after her dad was taken to hospital and died of his cancer. In between all this she had 2 living children as well, currently 8 months and 2.5. You couldn't make it up, so much shit happening to one lovely person.

When her mum died, her dad couldn't manage the dogs and my friend took them in until a new home could be found. After her dad died she had a breakdown and her husband couldn't manage her support, two kids, a FT job and 2 dogs. We agreed to temporarily look after the dogs. They've been with us 6months. Both my friend, her husband and myself have tried to find them alternative homes. They're very bonded (mum and pup) and need a home together which is making it harder. We've been turned down by breed specific rescues (1 agreed to try and find a home whilst we 'fostered' but nothing has come of it), dogs trust and local charities. Mainly because they're trying to force our hand to keep them. RSPCA have said we can surrender when they aren't full but as mum dog has a health condition (manageable with medication) she'll likely be euthanised unless they re-home her or find a no kill shelter within 2 weeks. Local vets have also been approached but nothing has come of it.

We need to re-home them/ move them from our house. DH doesn't want a dog. Has never wanted a dog. I like dogs and would probably keep them if he were on board but I work FT out of the home, DH WFH so most care really falls to him. We also have 2 kids, 2&4. Plus extra cleaning they create and the money. We can't afford doggy day care or a dog walker for the two (well maybe we could, but don't want to, it isn't a priority for us and we're far from rich do it would be at the expense of other things). Thankfully the insurers have been amazing and transferred the existing insurance to us otherwise we'd be paying in full for the medication, but I don't think they'd transfer it again.

Friend and husband have said they absolutely won't have them back, even if that means they're euthanised - they just can't cope (fair enough). They've asked friends, relatives and neighbors, as have we.

The rehoming shelters are all basically saying they are full with lockdown puppies and puppy farm breeding dogs and cannot take more dogs right now.

Does anyone have any suggestions? My next port of call is to sell them but I'm just so so wary of that as you hear the horror stories of bait dogs etc. But is selling them better than having them PTS?

Please help, any suggestions? Not a begging thread and PMs requesting details will be ignored.

OP posts:
wetotter · 14/11/2021 18:29

Another thing to try is talking to local professional dog walkers especially those who also offer home boarding (as they will be licensed and insured - ie more likely to be reputable). They will know so many doggy people local to you, and might know who has good personal links to rescues (maybe fostering/assessing) and might know of smaller ones with good standards.

Ditto proprietors of grooming parlours and registered/qualified trainers and behaviourists.

Prattypitel · 14/11/2021 18:31

Have a look at website Pets4homes.I got both of my dogs from this site.an other site is Preloved(dog section).I wish you all the best and holefully you find a lovely new home for those adorable dogs.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:33

@Gwrach

I know in our area people have been surrendering their dog to the dog warden by saying "they have found them straying" and they just leave them with the dog warden. Lots of lock down puppies.

I have to be honest I think after 7 days they are PTS, even though they say "they move them on after 7 days to be re-homed out of area if possible" but I'd say they PTS.

I suppose this is what it has come to with rescues full.

Yes, I spoken to several charities/ shelters at length and they're all saying the same sort of thing. Just over run with lockdown puppies and puppy farm bitches that are no longer profitable. Dogs being put down by the minute.

I'm worried about behavioural issues of mum if we rehomed the younger one, I think it'd send DH over the edge. Plus it doesn't really reduce any stress on us.

The cut off is Christmas as we're going away whilst we have a new kitchen and boiler installed. So they'll be in kennels then anyway.

Both are neutered. Mum is a beagle, 'pup' (is 7!) Is beagle cross.

I'll try the rescues mentioned. Thanks.

OP posts:

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JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:34

wetotter thanks, good suggestions.

OP posts:
mayblossominapril · 14/11/2021 18:39

Have you asked at your vets and other local vets? There are people who can’t necessarily afford to buy a dog but can afford to keep them.
Local college that does anima management or any small animal courses will have contacts

icedcoffees · 14/11/2021 18:43

Have you spoken to Beagle Welfare?

TedMullins · 14/11/2021 18:46

Sorry but I’ve got to agree with the other poster too. She doesn’t have cancer so it really isn’t comparable. I’ve got severe mental health issues and a dog and I’d never do this - at the very least I would be paying for the dog’s care/treatments if I did have to temporarily find him alternative accommodation which it doesn’t sound like she’s doing. You can’t just abandon your dog because life gets tough. If you like and are willing to keep the dogs why does your H’s opinion take precedence? Surely it’s preferable to get a dog walker (and they’re really not expensive) than seeing them PTS.

NorthSouthcatlady · 14/11/2021 18:52

Your friend sounds like a total dick. Why has your friend dumped them on you. Poor dogs. Everyone has a sob story but you can’t just absolve yourself of responsibilities

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 18:53

@icedcoffees

Have you spoken to Beagle Welfare?
Yes. They were lovely and tried to be helpful.
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FFSFFSFFS · 14/11/2021 18:57

Def try many tears - abs emphasise that they’re a bonded pair - if they’re house trained with no beehavioural issues they might be too hard to place

icedcoffees · 14/11/2021 18:57

@JunoMcDuff I'm glad you've spoken to them (I'm a beagle owner myself).

I would second (or third) speaking to Many Tears - they have a huge network of fosterers and may be able to help you.

As a temporary solution, can your friend afford to pay to put the dogs into kennels or with a local home boarder to give you some reprieve?

I would also join the group "Beagle Banter But Better" on Facebook and ask on there. There are lots of experienced fosterers and re-homers on that group who specialise in beagles and may be able to direct you to a smaller rescue.

I post on there regularly and they're a fantastic group who will do anything to help a fellow beagle owner or fosterer :)

FFSFFSFFS · 14/11/2021 18:58

Please don’t sell them online - def dog bait risk. But also please don’t kill them - I get that your husband finds them annoying - but could you really kill them because he doesn’t like them?

FFSFFSFFS · 14/11/2021 18:59

Sorry meant that they might NOT be too hard to place because they’re house trained with no behavioural issues!!!!

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 19:01

@TedMullins

Sorry but I’ve got to agree with the other poster too. She doesn’t have cancer so it really isn’t comparable. I’ve got severe mental health issues and a dog and I’d never do this - at the very least I would be paying for the dog’s care/treatments if I did have to temporarily find him alternative accommodation which it doesn’t sound like she’s doing. You can’t just abandon your dog because life gets tough. If you like and are willing to keep the dogs why does your H’s opinion take precedence? Surely it’s preferable to get a dog walker (and they’re really not expensive) than seeing them PTS.
But they aren't and never were her dogs! Her father was rushed to hospital, she took the dogs over night, contacted rescues the next day. She never intended to keep the dogs.

She isn't to blame here.

A dog walker everyday would cost us around £300 a month as we've looked in to it, it would be pretty much all our spare money which I think is a family decision. I would probably keep them because I can't imagine putting them to sleep but it wouldn't be my choice to have a dog and the restrictions it puts on our life. If I was the one WFH it might be different.

OP posts:
JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 19:05

@FFSFFSFFS

Please don’t sell them online - def dog bait risk. But also please don’t kill them - I get that your husband finds them annoying - but could you really kill them because he doesn’t like them?
It's cost, time and the restrictions it puts on our life.

We can't visit family as much as we'd like or go away on holiday, or weekends away etc like we would because we have to factor in the cost of kennels etc. Currently friends are giving us a little money but they can't afford to keep doing it.

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Cornishclio · 14/11/2021 19:10

What a situation and it was very kind of you to step in and help your friend. They were not her responsibility really as they were her parents dog so I think it is a bit unkind to say it is up to her to sort it out but I don't suppose you thought it would be such a long term thing. Unfortunately I think you need to set a time limit and unless you can find a home/rescue centre or your husband gets on board with keeping them then PTS may be the only option left. It is sad that all those people who got puppies over lockdown are now cluttering up rescue centres so that genuine cases like your friends parents dogs cannot be helped.

SweetBabyCheeses99 · 14/11/2021 19:11

You agreed to look after the dogs TEMPORARILY. Not to re-home them and take on all responsibility indefinitely. I’m sure your friend is still suffering but she has a husband too and he is being a CFer.

I’m surprised to hear this about shelters though - I’ve had three separate friends adopt from overseas recently (Spain/Cyprus/Romania) because that’s all they could find?

NoSquirrels · 14/11/2021 19:11

How old is the mum - 9?

Realistically you have a pair of old dogs, of a fair size, of a breed that can be a bit Marmite.

I’d really hope Many Tears could help you - they definitely get a lot of beagles through - but if not them PTS is a realistic and kinder option than rehoming them via private sale.

hiredandsqueak · 14/11/2021 19:17

Try JLP Trust on Facebook they are Rotherham based. It's where we rehomed our lovely dog from and each one of the people, who run the rescue, we met were lovely.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 19:23

@SweetBabyCheeses99

You agreed to look after the dogs TEMPORARILY. Not to re-home them and take on all responsibility indefinitely. I’m sure your friend is still suffering but she has a husband too and he is being a CFer.

I’m surprised to hear this about shelters though - I’ve had three separate friends adopt from overseas recently (Spain/Cyprus/Romania) because that’s all they could find?

I think that's because those rescues are less fussy about people's circumstances. I know people in the past (pre this situation) who've done that because they worked FT or had young kids or cats etc and the 'normal' rescues wouldn't re-home to them.
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FazedNotPhased · 14/11/2021 19:24

I think your friend is to blame here. I wouldn't dream of dumping my parents' dogs on a friend and then absolving myself of all responsibility.

I think you should ask her to find a solution, and if you want to you could offer to help her. It shouldn't be your decision to put them to sleep because that's such a difficult call - why should it fall to you? You sound like such a good friend but I'm pretty shocked that it's all been left to you.

JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 19:28

SweetBabyCheeses99 we agreed to take them until they were rehomed. But we didn't expect it to take so long and neither did my friend. They aren't cheeky fuckers at all. Initially we (friend and I) were in very regular contact with 2 rescues who really did try to re-home them whilst we fostered them but as another poster says we've 2 older dogs, one with health issues, they were never going to be easy to re-home. They are cat and child friendly which we assumed would make it easier but almost every rehoming centre we spoke with has an almost blanket ban on rehoming with toddlers.

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JunoMcDuff · 14/11/2021 19:29

FazedNotPhased her solution is for them to be PTS. I'm doing a last ditch attempt to get them a home before that happens. As others have advised. It'll be PTS before I go to pets4homes etc.

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CMOTDibbler · 14/11/2021 19:31

She might not be able to help, but try phoning Pip at EGLR - they are lurcher specialists but do also take some other breeds as needed. No kennels, they only have fosterers and never PTS unless it is in the dogs best interests

Daisy4569 · 14/11/2021 19:33

I have a beagle and am part of a couple of groups on FB made up of numerous members who often rehome or temporarily home beagles in need. With some checks I’d far rather mine was rehomed than pts. There are plenty of kind people out there, they aren’t all looking to hurt dogs just because they’re individuals and not a charity

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