Need new life and new friends, can you help me be positive?

[TurnStone]

I am married and retired. When first retired, DH and I lived the dream of our lives, until lockdown. Now moved to an area close to one family member but so far, no friends (COVID curtailed many social opportunities).

Not possible to resume living our dream life, for several reasons incl increasing age-related physical condition (DH).

I am aware that my life is enormously privileged compared to some, yet my days feel grey and pointless. Have applied for voluntary work but nothing yet. Help ....
( Not getting a pet)

Are you looking for new hobbies/interests?

I joined the WI and have met loads of new friends 😊 Would you enjoy a walking group? An art/craft related class or meet up?

Thanks, the WI might be worth investigating. Also enjoy walking, but haven't found a group , nor a class for arts/crafts nearby.

Have looked on local meetup.com but there's not much of interest in the vicinity ....

Join the wild women wanderers group on Facebook, and then find and join your local branch. You'll have lots to do and lots of potential new friends to do it with in no time.

Thanks for the wild women wanderers suggestion. I'm not on Facebook could someone kindly let me know if there are any wild women wanderers in Wales or are they specific to another UK country?
TIA

Where did you apply for voluntary work? I remember seeing an advert for a brilliant website for volunteering for the over 50s and I wish I could remember the name of it. Life after 50 or something similar? Anyway it covered loads of different options in different sectors so there would be no difficulty in finding something to suit your specific skill set or areas of interest.

Are you very politically engaged? I imagine a really great way to meet potential friends would be to join the local branch of your party of choice, volunteering to do leaflet drops or whatever. I imagine there could potentially be a social life on the back of that - at least you'll know that they are like minded people!

A rambling group would be good, there's bound to be one - keep looking. Lots of time to chat as you walk.

I just googled: wildwandererswomen.com/

www.livingstreets.org.uk/products-and-services/projects/walking-friends-wales

Might be useful depending where in Wales you are ..

@YouJustFoldItIn

Where did you apply for voluntary work? I remember seeing an advert for a brilliant website for volunteering for the over 50s and I wish I could remember the name of it. Life after 50 or something similar? Anyway it covered loads of different options in different sectors so there would be no difficulty in finding something to suit your specific skill set or areas of interest.

Are you very politically engaged? I imagine a really great way to meet potential friends would be to join the local branch of your party of choice, volunteering to do leaflet drops or whatever. I imagine there could potentially be a social life on the back of that - at least you'll know that they are like minded people!

A rambling group would be good, there's bound to be one - keep looking. Lots of time to chat as you walk.

Some great ideas, thanks YouJustFoldItIn I have applied specifically for a vacancy to arise in the local Trussell Trust sponsored outfit.

As for political support, really not my thing ( cynical from former life in close contact with politics) but great suggestion !

Have been out with Ramblers (politics again) their ethos is a bit full-on for my liking but grateful for your consideration.

This was the one I was thinking of, I think. Lots of options on here, not just volunteering but studying and hobbies and work too.

restless.co.uk/career-advice/job-ideas/10-volunteering-opportunities-for-over-50s/

Some others:

volunteeringjourneys.com/over-50s-volunteering/

volunteeringmatters.org.uk/pillars/older-people/

Do you like gardening? There may be a local community garden you could help at. That would be a great way to meet people.

I always make friends when I join gyms. I only join for the swimming but each time seem to gain a new friend. Is this an option? I find the aqua classes really friendly.
How about volunteering with the National Trust?

Do you know if there is a local facebook page for your village or neighbourhood? If you can find one then join it. Maybe ask if there are any local retired people interested in coming along to a community coffee morning or something.

Do you play cards? Bridge? Mahjong? Do you think you'd enjoy learning?

Church? Offer to join the Parish council just to take minutes or whatever? Even if you are not churchy it's a good way to get to meet local people, throwing yourself into church fetes, harvest suppers and quiz nights etc.

Obviously WI has been mentioned. What about a choir? Doesn't have to be the church choir - it could be a rock choir even!

Local health and leisure centre will have classes like Aquafit for mature ladies, then you can sit and drink coffee and eat cake afterwards.

haha crossed posts with DampSquid!

Awesome, thanks @YouJustFoldItIn and @DampSquidGames
So much to explore

tho' maybe not the gardening (used to have a biggish garden whose upkeep exceeded my enthusiasm) ...

Sorry but, I only swim in the sea and when the sun is hot enough not to need a towel to get dry again. Hate indoor pools , sorry

Am Dram? Helping in the local school with reading, or mentoring struggling teenagers? Although that would be rewarding and keep you busy it wouldn't necessarily open doors to a social life.

Stitch and bitch group? Evening classes? Belly Dancing? Creative writing group, photography group, book group?

Actually a book group is a great one. I still have loads of friends from my book group. Ask in the library or ask on your neighbourhood FB page.

Sorry but, I only swim in the sea and when the sun is hot enough not to need a towel to get dry again. Hate indoor pools , sorry

Doesn't have to be Aquafit, it could just be keep fit.

Had considered the church route but am fundamentally opposed to organised religion and would find it uncomfortable to pretend otherwise

I am difficult and picky, I quite understand. Rock choir? Was in a community choir some years ago, not keen enough to do again.

Am truly appreciative of all the wonderful ideas for avenues I had so far overlooked

Used to go to keep fit, yoga and book groups but IME they didn't really result in friendships outside of the activity per se. It must be my insular vibe.

A dear friend of mine joined the University for 3rd age and has enjoyed it greatly

I think if it was me I’d join/do lots of things and hope it leads to one or two friendships. It’s like the school gates, where there are a hundred parents buy you only need to click with one or two and then you have your little group. Until you find your people the activities will be social and something to do.

@prampushingdownthehighst

A dear friend of mine joined the University for 3rd age and has enjoyed it greatly

Thanks, the U3A is quite active round here but I don't feel ready to commit to it as yet.

If you like animals but don't want to get a pet, could you volunteer at your local rescue? Or the Cinnamon Trust? I've done some dog walking for our nearest one, and a couple of others close by have recently put out appeals for help with certain things / on certain days (the most recent one was help bathing 50 dogs that had been taken in from hoarding conditions). I've found animal people are generally pretty chatty and inclusive