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Friend stopped talking to me

4 replies

jellycustardcream · 23/10/2021 14:09

Known friend for a couple of years through gym class we both went to, always got on really well. Got quite close especially over lockdown and both wanted to get fit so would go out on walks together and chat. This year we've both moved house and had tough times at work, and it's been great to have mutual support. Often met up for coffee or a meal or just takeaway night.

Few weeks before I moved she started to get a bit distant, but hadn't long moved so I just thought probably busy with that and work. I messaged to say I miss chatting and would love to see you before I move a few weeks later. She replied back and thought I wanted some space (I didn't and never said I did). But she came over, we had a lovely evening, started contacting each other lots. I moved and when I got to the house already in post a lovely card saying how happy she was for me and couldn't want to see house. All lovely.

Then distance again. I messaged saying if she wants to talk I'm all ears and miss her. I've moved about an hour away so always happy to meet up, just maybe a little more planning. She said yeah thanks really appreciate it and then... nothing. This was few weeks ago.

I'm a little bit upset but more confused and afaik I haven't done anything. I'm trying to just give some space and probably she has something going on in her life doesn't want to talk to me about, but just seems a bit off we've been so close and now nothing.

Don't have any mutual friends to ask and the gym class stopped with covid and we weren't friends with any of the others. Neither of us does social media really either and wouldn't want to be weird and stalkery anyway.

Should I leave it? Or try again?

OP posts:
Row1n · 23/10/2021 14:16

It sounds like for her the friendship was convenient and now that its not so easy to meet up without forward planning she isn't so bothered. Sorry OP. Id be looking to make connections with other people and leave the ball in this friends court, see if she is interested. But personally Id bot be bothering with someone who isnt bothered with me

ElleStartingOver · 23/10/2021 14:17

Could you ask her straight what’s going on? Just that you’ve noticed she’s been a bit quiet and you’re worried you might have unintentionally upset her?

If she doesn’t respond or is vague after that then I wouldn’t try again.

Holly60 · 23/10/2021 14:23

It just sounds like she liked having a friend close by, and now you are further she isn’t so bothered. I think she likes you, just wants an easy time

jellycustardcream · 23/10/2021 14:24

I did think maybe me moving away has caused it, but she had known this for a long time given how long the process took. And kept saying how much she can't wait to come and visit and hit the town. So I'd be surprised if it was that, but I'm only guessing and sometimes people just say things and don't always mean it.

OP posts:
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