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Original poster

What did you do for your 40th birthday?

98 replies

partyplanner82 · 20/10/2021 20:24

Just that really...

I simply can't decide whether to spend my budget on a classic party in pub function room (early March) with DJ, buffet and welcome drink, then pay bar.

Or to spend the money on getting something cosmetic done (composite teeth bonding) or something with just a few friends like meal or spa.

What did you do? Please help!

OP posts:
hotmeatymilk · 21/10/2021 07:56

Cake and a walk and a play in the garden with DD and her little friends – a party for her, really. Dinner at home. Too knackered for partying and can’t get a babysitter.

ISpyCobraKai · 21/10/2021 07:56

Lunch at The Kitchin in Edinburgh and a Harry Styles gig.
Exactly what I wanted.

FrankTurner · 21/10/2021 08:03

Went to NY, just me and my closest friend who turned 40 the same year. Stayed a week, she flew home, I went on to Canada to stay with friends for a further week. Left DH and teens at home in UK. Best time ever, once in a lifetime trip!

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Events & celebrations
Kione · 21/10/2021 08:07

I had a party, buffet, etc. I love people and socializing, and could not wait to see and have fun with family and friends, pampering does not do anything for me.

coodawoodashooda · 21/10/2021 08:12

Realised my h was a bastard and got divorced. Best decision ever.

Groovee · 21/10/2021 08:14

As it's the week before Christmas. My Dd worked out where Elf the musical was and booked tickets. We did a media city tour and went to the Christmas markets. Was a great weekend.

NearLifeExperience · 21/10/2021 08:14

DH took me for a surprise weekend away, didn't tell me where until we were at airport. It was Amsterdam, in super posh hotel and it was lovely.
Best present arrived nine months after that weekend! (Youngest DD)

niki26 · 21/10/2021 08:17

Mine is next year - my daughter turns 7 five days before my 40th at the beginning of December so we are planning to go to New York for it! It's been planned for a while and we always said 7 was a good age for her to be for New York at Christmas - but we've actually had another baby since and she'll be 2 then so not as convenient but it is what it is eh!

Doomscrolling · 21/10/2021 08:40

Ice skating at the Rockefeller Center, which was like living in a film. I loved it.

We had 4 days in New York and 3 in Washington. It was amazing. The kids stayed with the grandparents.

nolongersad2021 · 21/10/2021 08:49

I am going to be 40 in December.

This time last year I said to myself if nothing changes I'll drown myself in alcohol... I was so low...I was single, childless, isolated and lonely (covid and ore-covid). I really saw no point in continuing with life. My family isn't nearby and I have a couple of good friends but they had their own lives to be getting on with.

Aged 39 I underwent reproductive assistance with a sperm donor and am now 35 weeks pregnant. I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present and a new chapter to begin!

reluctantbrit · 21/10/2021 09:04

Joined party in a pub/bar with a friend whose birthday is 3 days after mine.

Nice but looking back not really my thing so when I turn 50 next year a party won't be on.

RhubarbFairy · 21/10/2021 09:12

Both DH and I turn 40 next year too.

Plan is to be in Riga without the DC on his (April, already booked) and mine falls in the summer holidays around when we'd normally be on holiday anyway, so I get to pick the location and we've asked MIL and my parents to join us.

Neither of us want a party. In your position I'd do something with a few close friends. Doesn't have to be a meal if you don't like eating out and talking at the same time.

Enko · 21/10/2021 09:50

Almost nothing I can recall feeling very disappointed dhs idea of giving me a good birthday was to take me out for lunch him and I. For his 40th we had a meal out with 12 friends. I learned and for my 50th I invited friends for a meal.

maudmadrigal · 21/10/2021 10:09

I had a party. We had it at home, though spilled over onto the rec. across the street a bit (we have a large and scruffy house). About 60 people, including children. It was great fun, a proper old school house party for us, and the kids loved staying up late and playing football in the dark/watching a film with their friends way after bedtime. I'm 45, and they still talk about it now.

DH and I had a night away and dinner in my favourite restaurant too. And we did a local sea-swim challenge that we'd agreed to do for our 40ths years before.

StColumbofNavron · 21/10/2021 10:12

I had various small breakfasts/lunches with different groups of people and a BBQ with family. I am a party person and I did this because of Covid etc (I had wanted to invite people overseas to my family’s house) but actually found I preferred this and don’t feel I missed out or anything. Each one was really special because of where we went or what we ate etc.

PeterPomegranate · 21/10/2021 10:15

I went out with family for a meal and to the viewing platform at the top of the Shard. Had a great day. I was pregnant at the time so a big boozy party was out of the running.

Christmasbird · 21/10/2021 10:16

Went to dubai with dp, he organised the lot bless him. Stayed in the burj khalifa and atlantis, absolutely could not top that experience, everything about it was so special.

VienneseWhirligig · 21/10/2021 10:17

I celebrated 40 twice - once at 39 with terminally ill DH who knew he likely wouldn't be around, and then on the day itself.

First celebration - went to London for the weekend, afternoon tea at the Shard, did cheesy tourist things like the changing of the guards and Tower of London, walking in St James Park (slowly but still lovely).

Second celebration - went to a quiz night at a newly opened gay bar with my family (sister and her partner, son, parents, grandma) then on for food at a really nice gin bar. The same weekend I had a bbq with my family.

Sprostongreen21 · 21/10/2021 10:18

If you can afford it do what makes you happy. Life is short! Though I do like the idea of celebrating with friends/family you could just arrange a meal out rather than a big party?

We don’t have children and both turned 40 the same year pre covid so had a great time celebrating. I had a family party at home, friends night out and a holiday to America.

I appreciate every year I get to live and be healthy after what the alternatives can be. So I tend to celebrate all my birthdays ( which some on here think adults shouldn’t)

Gonnagetgoing · 21/10/2021 10:18

I had two 'celebrations'. One was a glam bar in South London and the other was a tapas restaurant.

The only thing I'd say, is just because it's a landmark birthday don't expect everyone to see it that way, I had a couple of people cancel, one whom I'd made or did make the effort for her landmark birthday and I wouldn't bother with her now!

ginslinger · 21/10/2021 10:19

I had a house party - paid for everything, booze and food. Went out for lunch the following day with a few people who had stayed over. That was over 20 years ago - in retrospect I wish I'd just spent the money on a super deluxe dinner for the people who had stayed over and spent the weekend with them. It would have been less hectic than organising the party

Marelle · 21/10/2021 10:20

Spend the money on yourself. Not on a load of randoms who probably wouldn’t bother with you except you’re paying for a free night out. It’s supposed to be a treat for you, not a treat for your friends and family. I didn’t celebrate my 40th with anyone - I spent all the money on a diamond ring for myself.

Fundays12 · 21/10/2021 10:21

I was meant to go away with DH for the first night away on our own in years but covid put a stop on that. DH took me for lunch on my own, friends stopped by for a garden visit and then I went out with my friend to the pub for lunch and drinks. It was a great weekend (until crazy neighbour started balling and started swearing at me that I was a drunk as I dared to leave my kids with there dad while I had fun with my friend but I digress).

berlinbabylon · 21/10/2021 10:24

I had lunch with some friends in a local pub (cost £300 - how on earth can you spend £1500!) and went to Edinburgh for my actual birthday and had afternoon tea at the Balmoral hotel.

Thinking about going to Berlin for my 50th if the Germans do away with vaccine passports in time (I am vaccinated, I just don't want to have to prove it everywhere I go). If not, maybe Belfast as I have never been there.

DennisSkinnersMolotov · 21/10/2021 10:25

Saw my favourite band play a very tiny venue (they were playing to tens of thousands the week before, then a 200 cap venue on my birthday) with DH and some really good friends. Had drinks with the band completely by chance before the gig. Best. Day. Ever.

DH's 50th was the week after so we're heading to Berlin next month for 4 days of child free touristing.