How can I explain to my dc that Christmas will be different this year - presents.

[bluebellYellow]

Me and dp are struggling. I was the biggest earner and last month lost my job. Dp earns just enough for most of our bills. His wage doesn't cover them all. I've applied to 4 jobs so far and had an interview for one. I was a nervous wreck as I know how much we need the money. I haven't heard back from them and I think they have employed someone since.
Two of our large kitchen appliances have just broke and needed replacing and our car needed a lot of repairs. It's all happened at once and the small bit of savings we had have dwindled.

Anyway, how can I prepare my dc for a Christmas with minimal presents/treats?
They've never had mountains of presents, but some from Santa and a few from us.

Eldest is 10 and I think this year they will really question things. Youngest is old enough to be excited about Santa coming and friends are already discussing what they are going to ask Santa for.

I cannot share with them our money worries and it's not fair they learn about Santa because of this.

What can I say/do so they can be prepared and not disappointed come Christmas Day?

Don’t say anything. Christmas will be what it is. Just remember to do the little exciting things like putting a mince pie and glass of milk out on Xmas Eve, and reading an Xmas story together before bed. Look in the library if you’ve not got one.
Try and get hold of some coloured paper and glue, and have fun making paper chains to hang up. This can be left over wrapping paper or white paper that they colour in.
There’s loads of cheap/free things you can do together to make it fun, not about presents.
And, if you’re really struggling, maybe ask grandparents if they could buy an extra gift that you can put under the tree from Father Xmas.

Hi, I would firstly try and see what I can do to replace the presents they would've got to lessen the blow so to speak.

1. Churches often give gifts to chikdren whose parents are struggling

1. Freecycle, Gumtree or freegle often have childrens clothes and toys for free, you can also request toys

1. Water companies such as Thames water, have charity grants to buy white goods

1. Look at local charities in your area and see if anything is available to you

With regards to finding work have you looked at apprenticeships? I got qualified as a childcare assistant through this route.

Don't worry, the 10 year old knows. At that age they're just playing along and enjoying it from that perspective.
In our house Santa has always only bought the stocking, I would say santander only does stockings, so any requests need to fit in it. They're only allowed to request one thing.
Almost half of the presents under the tree are secondhand, we couldn't afford all new. Some of the new things include a colouring book, selection box, cheap consumables that you can't buy secondhand anyway.

Obviously I did not mean santander, phone autocorrected

Tell them Santa's elves had Covid so they couldn't produce so much this year?

Are u able to get any presents - home bargains/ b&m for
Santa and nothing from you guys? I would put Santa before myself giving presents

Treats/activities. Look for the free stuff, walks locally, light switch on etc. Take flasks of hot chocolate with you to share.
Christmas carol service at church is always lovely and Christmassy too.

Ask at local charities for help. I help out at a toy appeal and help get presents to children who wouldn't otherwise get anything.

Go to the library and get a lovely Christmas chapter book. (My DD loves Christmasaurus). We read a couple of chapters every evening in December.

I have found some great toys in charity shops and on Facebook market place. I pop them in an old cardboard box wrapped in Christmas paper to disguise the fact that they're not new. I have found some real bargains.
Especially around this time of year as people are starting to have a bit of a clear out.

I’m sorry times are tough. Fingers crossed you get a new job soon.

Don’t stress about Christmas now, really. Plenty of time. Pick up little bits along the way as you can e.g. selection boxes have started appearing in supermarkets and they discount them, or things like bath fizzers and novelty/fun toiletries and practical stuff bulk out a stocking so pick up what you can when you can.

Experience gifts are free - a ticket to exchange for a pamper day out with Mum for your 10-yr-old (or whatever she’d enjoy) - then you can plan it around vouchers/cheap or free things to do and for a time you’ve been able to save a bit.

Have you applied for benefits and checked your entitlement? Called up companies to see if there’s a bit of breathing room on bills?

Don't assume the 10 yo knows about Santa My DS didn't, though my dd did. However, rather than running ragged round charity shops and trying to make it the same, maybe take this opportunity to say this has been a really tough year and Christmas is about being together, appreciating what you get, thinking about what you give etc. Write a letter from santa saying something similar if you like. Make this one memorable and special by making it different, not cos they got X under the tree.

For children age 10 and younger I actually think it's easier as they don't have a good understanding of which things cost more and can be delighted with cheap gifts. This isn't usually true for teens!

For example, you know those huge long tubes of Jaffa cakes the supermarkets stock close to Christmas? My kids LOVE those as they look so impressive. Agree about toys in charity shops too. Lots of people had a clear out over lockdown so you may find some good stuff. You'll be far more aware than the kids that it isn't new!

You can go eco friendly, a 10 year old will understand that I think, doing it for the planet. Dont waste money on wrapping paper etc use clothes/blankets/old magazines for wrapping its much better. Use old magazines for making paper chains with the kids in the days leading up to christmas it will be really nice for them.
yes do all the free stuff like church carols etc. use only charity shops for presents.
Also agree you can say post pandemic is not a time for extravagance etc, a time for family and peaceful being together very important etc.bringing it back to the true meaning of christmas type thing rather than about lots of presents.

We’ve been in this situation before. Look for other ways of making Christmas special - we have done things like a chocolate hunt where we’ve hidden little chocolates around the house and made a hunt with clues (from Santa!) with a little charity shop present at the end. One of our dds wanted a Pandora bracelet and luckily wasn’t old enough to realise whether it was really pandora or not so we found one on Amazon for about £5 with loads of little charms and got a little fake Christmas tree and decorated it with all the fake charms for her to come down and find from Santa (she’s 18 now and still says it was one of her favourite Christmases)!

Go for a special Christmas walk. Make stuff together. Get loads of board games and puzzles from charity shops.

It will be okay. The children won’t miss things as much as you think they will. I think a lot of people are struggling this year so they’ll probably find Santa isn’t as generous as most years for most people anyway!

Thank you everyone. I will definitely try these ideas.
Some of them seem so obvious, but it's difficult to think when under so much stress. So thank you all.

When we’ve had frugal Christmases, like the year DH was made redundant in November when I was on Mat leave, I did stockings of things the dc would need anyway, but maybe a bit nicer. Star Wars toothbrush, cartoon socks/pants , water bottle and cheap sweets from £1 shop.

Try local NCT and children's toy/ clothes

Sales that should say

B&M have got their Xmas stuff out already.
They had a smaller selection box for 89p yesterday and that would bulk out the present pile when wrapped up.
A cheap fluffy ‘throw’ type blanket for their bed would bulk it out too, and most kids like them.
Fluffy socks were cheap as well.
Have a look in Poundland too. It’s all about making the pile look more than it is.

My kids always liked those flannels that were tightly packed into a small shape, but then grew into a flannel. They got one every year in their stocking.
Very often it’s the little things they like more.

We also said Santa bought stockings. V handy indeed if for fluctuating incomes and also when they ask for something you can't get! Maybe just reframe it. I agree 10 year old probably knows. May be worth broaching it with them and bringing them into the magic of being a Christmas maker? God that does sound a bit Disney!

When my DS was small we made a point of going to the lights switching on, seeing Santa and his sleigh go through the streets, going to the Cathedral, walking in the snow, putting bits out for Santa.

Does your place do a Christmas tree competition so you can see them all? You could maybe drive to other places to see all the lights being switched on?

On the day itself could they have a stocking just with bits and one present? A tree and Christmas lunch.

The amount of stuff I bought my DS makes me feel queasy. He uses to say it was too much. I'm sure you will have a lovely time!

I cannot share with them our money worries

Why not? I don't meant sharing the full extent but DP lost his job just before last Christmas and our 9 year old knew this meant money was tight. Given his sector was heavily hit by Covid, we'd also told DS that DP's job was at risk. In an age acceptable way and obviously with a lot of 'there's nothing you need to be worried about' thrown in but better that than him overhearing things / picking up on stress and not understanding at all.

On Christmas, I've always insisted that big presents come from us not Santa so I didn't have that worry but I'm sure I've seen guidance online of what you can say to kids about Santa presents. At 10, is he doesn't know about Santa it's because he's choosing he wants to believe and so will probably accept some fairs unbelievable reasoning!

In the meantime between jobs may be consider joining an app like Task Rabbit. They have office admin and pay by the hour. Hope you find something soon.

Really good suggestions on here.

I also did a clear out before Christmas last year where I asked DC (4) to select some toys he no longer played with to go to charity. Is that something you could do but sell them on Facebook market place or eBay instead to raise some funds? Or maybe you have some stuff you don't use anymore to sell.

I have a few items I'm going to try and sell. This money is for our left over bills though.
If dp didn't need the car for his job, I would happily sell that too.