How can I explain to my dc that Christmas will be different this year - presents.

[bluebellYellow]

Me and dp are struggling. I was the biggest earner and last month lost my job. Dp earns just enough for most of our bills. His wage doesn't cover them all. I've applied to 4 jobs so far and had an interview for one. I was a nervous wreck as I know how much we need the money. I haven't heard back from them and I think they have employed someone since.
Two of our large kitchen appliances have just broke and needed replacing and our car needed a lot of repairs. It's all happened at once and the small bit of savings we had have dwindled.

Anyway, how can I prepare my dc for a Christmas with minimal presents/treats?
They've never had mountains of presents, but some from Santa and a few from us.

Eldest is 10 and I think this year they will really question things. Youngest is old enough to be excited about Santa coming and friends are already discussing what they are going to ask Santa for.

I cannot share with them our money worries and it's not fair they learn about Santa because of this.

What can I say/do so they can be prepared and not disappointed come Christmas Day?

Oh yes and Aldi middle aisle is great for gifts. Good quality as well.

I think I would say you are trying to be more environmentally conscious this year and so more presents will be second hand/home made.

You could get the DC into it as well (eg, making something for grandma, giving their old toys to the charity shop) and then although Christmas might feel different it will be in a nice "we're helping the planet" way.

The Christmas Bargain threads might have some useful ideas.

Could you look into getting a job in a supermarket OP to tide you over the Christmas period? You’d probably get lots of hours and you’d get staff discount too.

What about wrapping up little vouchers for special treats e.g. choosing a movie for movie night at home, going on a trip to the seaside?

Sell the things they don't play with I do this every year so its not going to landfill. Buy second hand toys/ games ect again I do this every year things are crazy prices brand new you can get things for a fraction of the cost second hand in good condition.

I’ve only read about half the thread so someone has probably already suggested second hand from eBay. Both my children’s main birthday presents have been from there this year

Maybe Santa could leave vouchers for things they'd never be allowed do otherwise? Mine love things like having breakfast in bed, dinner in the bath, toasting hotdogs over the fire, sleeping in the sitting room, and being allowed to climb out their bedroom windows (only on their birthdays, and it's a bungalow!). All completely free but very memorable

I'm so sorry things are tough .

I wouldn't say anything at all to them, except perhaps to 10 year old if they have their heart set on something expensive.

I think you can pull this off because, for kids (especially younger ones), bigger is often better regardless of the actual cost. So I'd go for relatively cheap, big gifts (of things that will actually be used). Like a cheap children's baking set with some new colourful mixing bowls - you could wrap the bowls in a cardboard box for bigger impact. Or a box of fancy ice-cream cones, some sundae dishes and sprinkles to make ice-cream sundaes. Could you get one of those huge colour-in playhouse things (Aldi have one for £9.99) or would that be too expensive? Also, look second-hand - ebay, gumtree, FB etc. For impact, you could also blow up lots of Christmas balloons and rig up something above the door so they fall on your DC when they enter the room. We've done that for birthdays before and our DC loves it - they talk about it more than the gifts!

I also agree that they're most likely to remember the experiences and things you do with them in the lead-up to Christmas - so Christmas lights walks, Christmas baking, carol concert, meet Santa if you can find an affordable one locally, Christmas movie night, making decorations, that sort of thing. As a child, I always loved the run-up to Christmas but found Christmas day itself a bit stressful.

Out of interest, what is your total budget per child? If money wasn't an issue, what would you be buying for them this Christmas? This might make it easier to suggest things.

I think many people will be reading this thread right now whilst wondering the very same thing OP.

You could turn this situation to your advantage though because whilst it’s clearly a shit time for you financially you might be able to give them their best ever Christmas by making the whole event magical for them by doing more than simply wrapping a mountain of toys.

They won’t be the only ones in their class who don’t get the latest gadgets and gizmos this year but if they have a great time and the home feels festive and happy that’s all that matters and will be far more exciting than some of the kids opening iPhones but having a really unhappy day.

Get a few bulky inexpensive gifts wrapped up, the Christmas movies on and have a great day, if you’re smiling and happy they will be too, don’t let this ruin YOUR Christmas OP 🎅🏼

The Works is a good place for bulky wrap ups often on offer too, their books can be good stocking fillers too.

Charity shops are an excellent place to get things that are new or look new. Toys, puzzles, clothes and books can be really good and kids don't notice if an item isn't in pristine condition. I work in a charity shop and I'm often amazed at what good quality things people donate. Honestly not all charity shops smell of wee and are dirty and ours certainly isn't. Stock tends to sell or rotate quickly in popular shops but give it a go.
I feel for your predicament OP as I've been where you are with 3 children under 11 and we survived ok. One year I bought a bag of those soft indoor snowballs and put them in the stockings so we had an indoor snowball fights all Christmas. I bought small things like chocolate, small games, sweets, socks, gloves & collectable cards (like matchattaks or Yu-Gi-Oh) for stockings. They wrote a list each and I made sure that they had one item off it for their main present. Most importantly we spent Christmas watching films and playing games but spread present opening out across the day so that it seemed like a filled day of fun.

Give the charity shops a go as ours gets a lot of brand new stuff from other retailers or bankrupt stock but it will be much, much cheaper - we've been selling items from a certain accessories shop at a fraction of the price (think Hello Kitty soft toy that retails at £19.99 being sold for £2.99). Plus you're helping a good cause!

As others said don't tell the kids. Buy bits when you can, ask family if they can help out. Look an Facebook etc, loads people give away or sell toys very cheap. Especially in the run up to Christmas when they want to make space for all the new stuff.
Also look in charity shop, I always see toys in very good condition for a pound or two

Also 4 applications isn't many. I think you would be better to apply for every job you could do (even if its not your preferred job, money coming in is better than struggling, and you can continue to look for your preferred job whilst working)

I would be very careful about suggesting you're doing it for environmental reasons.
Firstly because if you then don't do the same the next year, they will question it.
Secondly because it isn't true, and if they pick up that they will lose trust, and worry whenever you say that you're doing something new, it's for a different reason.

Under 10 you should be able to get away with smaller presents. Work out how much you can have to spend, and buy in one lot and don't get more. Wilcos do things like fancy pens in packets of 3, divide the packet up and give one each. Rather than give them a packet of chocolate money, do a trail with a couple of coins at the end. Books from charity shops are cheap etc.

My dc are teens and half the presents they get are second hand, never had a complaint-they understand they get better and more presents. Then put in things they need. Toothbrush, pants, socks, new school bag-I had a talk with my teens a few years ago and asked if they would rather get them when they need them, or have them in the stocking. They all wanted them in their stocking.

As a child, one year our main present was a home made hotwater bottle cover each. I'm trying to remember how old I was, I know I was at primary and my sister was secondary, and there's 3 years apart, I think I was 10, but I might have been 9. I just remember loving it. My sister remembers thinking that finances must be tight and worrying. So if you think they'll notice, better to have a quick chat and let them know it's tight, but you'll be okay. But if they're primary age there's a good chance they won't notice.

A good friend who had a similar Christmas said they explained to their DCs that the budget this year was minute, eg £100 between the three of them and what do they think they should do. The DCs agreed to pool the money and got something like a hamster/gerbils. They look back at it now as one of their favourite Christmases.

As a kid my Christmas presents pretty much all came from charity shops (parents were eco friendly way before it was mainstream!). I think my parents probably spent £100 tops on the whole of Christmas inc food and it was always a magical time of year, I really don't think spending more would have improved anything. They put loads of thought into it and I was always overwhelmed by my stack of presents (all with recycled wrapping paper from previous Xmases - they probably still now have paper from 10 years ago). We weren't poor by any means, this was a choice and Nov-Dec were full of warmth, light and excitement. My friends did get a lot more stuff but I never saw it that way. I think (and this is my one practical suggestion, others have been much more helpful!) this was down to my parents' attitude - they were just as excited as me and took huge pleasure in giving me things they'd sought out or made.

You know your kids and what they like, whereas advertisers don't have the faintest clue about your kids and so have to manipulate them to shape them into little consumers. We can resist this!

OP don't be scared to let people know you are short.

Many many years ago a relative's husband left her in December and told his 5 year old Santa was dead. He then cleared out the bank account.

Presents for the children came from everywhere, lots of people just bought 'a bit of something' from neighbours, I think one of the kids teachers, all sorts of places.

Also try to see things from your children's point of view. I went to buy felt tips in a £1 shop (I was teaching) the cheapest had frozen characters on them, I had an almost riot with the 17 year olds who wanted them.

I got some light up balloons for a friend's child, they had to be shared out between several children as they were apparently a really cool present.

Things that are not toys have also gone down with children I have bought from, a few years ago Tesco were getting rid of their camping gear, I got a tent and a wind up torch for £5.

To adults a torch is just something we use when there is a power cut but to children it is a toy, and then you can add some acetate sheets to make a magic lantern / projector.

Old tech is fascinating to children, think about an old cassette recorder and tapes or a typewriter or overhead projector.

Books with projects / crafts to make things can go down well, at 10 I had an electronics kit and I also made a pin hole camera - really easy to do and you don't need to do it on the day.

Your children WILL have a fab Christmas.

Make it more of an event rather than about the presents.

Unless it was something big, I could never remember from one year to another what I had bought my kids the previous year. Just wrap anything you can even if it's useful boring stuff.

We used to hide presents in the past and make a treasure hunt - unwrapping each present after they had found it (of course you need to write a list to remind you where you hid it).

One year, once they started wanting money rather than gifts, my husband did a game of Deal or No Deal in order to dish the money out

I think that you should tell the DC that things will be different this year.

When I was about 10, our Christmas gifts were of a much less quality than I'd remembered in previous years and I was a bit upset about it. What I didn't know at the time was that my DPs were about to lose their business and had barely two pennies to rub together at that point.

When I found out, I was so ashamed of myself that I'd been so unappreciative (internally, I said nothing to my folks about it ever). I'd have gladly not had any gifts, or just a few token ones, to spare them the worry of it all.