Catholic squirrels aka funny things kids say

[CatholicSquirrels]

Named changed as I've told this story in real life.

I was at mass with the DC. The priest has a regional accent that pronounces schools as scoo-ills. He was saying a prayer for Catholic education and a puzzled DD2 turns to me and asks 'what are Catholic squirrels?'

I just 😂😂

Tell me your laugh out loud 'kids say the funniest things' moments!

My DDad passed away a couple of years ago and was known as Grandad to my DCs. MIL has recently remarried following a divorce and her new husband wants to be known as Grandad to the DGC. To distinguish them, DS has started referring to my late father as 'Dead Grandad' .

@lollipoprainbow

My mum was walking my dd home from nursery and my dd kept saying there's Cyril, my mum thought it must be a neighbour or suchlike, it transpired that 'Cyril' was in fact Squirrel!! They will will always be cyrils to us now ! Along with cubumbumbumer for cucumber !

As a child, my brother used to call our great uncle, 'Uncle Squirrel'.

We had a hot holiday with a hire car that had a dangly air freshener on the mirror once. Somehow air conditioning ( which we used a lot) and the fascinating air freshener got mixed in ds2's mind. Air conditioning has always been 'air confreshener" every since.

I once offered DD3 some almonds as a snack. She replied, "what, you mean what you say after a prayer?".

Eldest ds always called dh's stubble "grubble". The kids are teens and they still say grubble.

DD used to call chocolate fingers 'chocolate fish fingers'.

Just remembered this one, Ds5 once asked if we could have "orangutans" for pudding. That took all of us to work out he wanted something with meringues.

My son thought suitcases were soup cases.

We visited my parents' house abroad for the first time and they had a blue cleaning block in their toilet. DS 2 had never seen that before and said " Who has blue wee?!? I bet it was Grandad!".

My then 7yr old ds was asked by a friend of mine if he was looking forward to an activity he was going to later in the day (he wasn’t). After a pause when he was obviously searching for a nice way to say no, he came up with “well, you can’t always hope for the best”, which is still a family saying now!

@hennybeans

We visited my parents' house abroad for the first time and they had a blue cleaning block in their toilet. DS 2 had never seen that before and said " Who has blue wee?!? I bet it was Grandad!".

Rumbled Grandad 😂

Comfort Pure fabric softener is called 'baby milk' by DD1. If you know the packaging you'll know why! Freaks the Sainsbury's delivery guys out when she cheers and says 'yay baby milk!'

For the benefit of worriers we have made it absolutely clear it is not a drink.

Also my smaller one used to call toothpaste ‘poopaste’. He’s 2

We were talking to DS (3) about his forehead, when he suddenly put his hand on the top of his head and asked "what number is this head?"

My son is 4 and has some speech delay. We were looking at a book about farms. There was a picture of a man shearing a sheep "he's taking its fluff off" Then there was a picture of a woolly sheep "he's got his furry on"
He used to call birds "hoots"

I used to call birds ditties (from dicky birds) I used to call out "Be Piet Dittie birds! (Be quiet Dickey birds). After the song "Oats, peas, beans and Barley Grows" My middle brother always asked if mum was going to put 'barley grows' in the soup. My little brother used to go on about "Buckle's Gike" (next door neighbour Michael's bike!).

My 2.5yo DD tickled me yesterday saying “Me not a person… me a WOMAN”

@Deathraystare I used to call my Nana's ndn son Steven's pigeons "Steeans peegees"

I mentioned this recently in another thread but my DD9 stayed at her nans for tea the other night and I asked her if she had any pudding and she said yes she had 'Ghetto'.

I questioned it and her response cracked me up like she was some sort of gangster
"Yes, you know that Ghetto thing..."

She meant Gateau 😂😂

My DS used to call lasagne Sonia.

Dd6 now calls Shiba Inu dogs Doge.

When it was dark outside DD would declare it 'Peach Black'.

When I was a kid our elderly next door neighbour suddenly disappeared, he was lovely and always chatted to us. I overheard the grown ups saying he’s ‘gone of his rocker’…I told the entire village and everyone we saw that week that mr smithson had fallen off his rockery.

DD says "night night, sleep tight, don't let the bunk beds bite" and DS at 9 still says "hostibal".

Croissants are now known as cross monsters in our house!

My niece has recently moved on from singing "old Hock Donald had a farm" which I loved.
Youngest nephew says 'why' when he means yes which can be confusing!
And eldest nephew hates to be reminded that he used to say "bye, see you yesterday" instead of tomorrow and once told me he wanted 'cousins' for breakfast. Took a while to work out he meant croissants 😂

My dh and I were getting our granddaughter ready for school when my dh commented on the rain and that she wouldn't be able to play out.
' Course we will grandad. They have a roof to keep us dry......And a big fence....to keep us in !'
It made me laugh all day thinking of a class of 5 year olds trying to escape.

When DD1 was little she couldn't say 'Grandad' and called him 'DadDad' instead.

Which would have been fitting except he was my Dad so it should have been 'MumDad' 😀